Эпизод с грантом Росса
Описание
Росс подает заявку на грант по палеонтологии и узнает, что бывший парень Чарли, Бенджамин Хобарт (Грег Киннер), рассматривает заявки. Росс и Чарли ужинают с ним, и становится очевидно, что Бенджамин все еще испытывает к ней чувства. Во время собеседования Бенджамин саботирует заявку Росса, не задавая ему никаких палеонтологических вопросов. Росс расстроен и сообщает об этом Чарли. Бенджамин признается Чарли в своих чувствах и рассказывает о своем плане вернуть ее. Чарли признается, что все еще испытывает чувства к Бенджамину, и возобновляет с ним отношения, что приводит к разрыву ее отношений с Россом. Фиби избавляется от вещей, чтобы Майк мог переехать к ней, но ей грустно расставаться со своей тревожной работой, Глэдис. Моника делает вид, что ей нравится работа, но втайне ненавидит ее. Фиби отдает ее ей, но Моника и Рейчел спорят, кому она должна достаться, поскольку Фиби считает, что обе хотят ее получить. Она создает еще одну, еще более тревожную работу, Глиннис, которую Моника оставляет себе, а Рейчел – Глэдис. Джоуи хочет, чтобы Чендлер устроил его на работу в рекламный ролик, над которым тот работает, но Чендлер считает, что он не подходит на эту роль. Чендлер лжет Джоуи, но Джоуи понимает это, когда Чендлер не комментирует странную рекламу японской мужской помады из его прослушивания. Чендлер заглаживает свою вину перед Джоуи, накрасив губы помадой из этой рекламы.
Субтитры
- 00:00:05,630 --> 00:00:07,715 - Mm, hey. RACHEL: Hi.
- 00:00:07,924 --> 00:00:09,425 Pheebs, what's wrong?
- 00:00:09,592 --> 00:00:13,137 Ah, I'm just so exhausted from dragging around this huge engagement ring.
- 00:00:13,304 --> 00:00:14,847 Oh, my God.
- 00:00:15,015 --> 00:00:16,056 - Congratulations. - Wow.
- 00:00:16,266 --> 00:00:19,143 So did he get on one knee? Did he have a speech prepared?
- 00:00:19,310 --> 00:00:21,186 Oh, did he cry?
- 00:00:23,398 --> 00:00:26,483 Yeah, big surprise, I like proposals.
- 00:00:27,235 --> 00:00:31,530 Well, it was really sweet, and, like, the most romantic thing ever.
- 00:00:31,698 --> 00:00:34,992 Here's to Phoebe, who's found the greatest guy in the world.
- 00:00:35,160 --> 00:00:36,285 To Phoebe and...
- 00:00:36,453 --> 00:00:37,953 I want to say "Mike"?
- 00:00:39,289 --> 00:00:41,707 - To Phoebe and Mike. RACHEL: Hey.
- 00:00:41,875 --> 00:00:42,916 - Thank you. RACHEL: Oh.
- 00:00:43,084 --> 00:00:44,710 - Oh, and I have something for you. - Hmm.
- 00:00:44,878 --> 00:00:48,380 It's my little black book. It's got the numbers of all the guys I've dated.
- 00:00:48,548 --> 00:00:52,509 Oh, ha, ha. Phoebe, that's nice, but you know what? I think I'm okay.
- 00:00:52,677 --> 00:00:55,262 Give it to one of your other single girlfriends.
- 00:00:55,430 --> 00:00:57,639 I would, but you're the last one.
- 00:00:59,642 --> 00:01:01,351 Give me the book!
- 00:01:02,645 --> 00:01:04,396 "Pablo Diaz.
- 00:01:04,564 --> 00:01:06,982 Brady Smith." Ha.
- 00:01:07,317 --> 00:01:09,026 "Guy in Van"?
- 00:01:09,194 --> 00:01:11,028 Oh, my first love.
- 00:01:11,237 --> 00:01:12,404 Ah.
- 00:01:12,572 --> 00:01:15,741 What does the red X next to Bob Gremore's name mean?
- 00:01:15,909 --> 00:01:17,785 Dead.
- 00:01:19,162 --> 00:01:22,539 Oh, it's okay. No, he was old. Yeah.
- 00:01:22,707 --> 00:01:26,543 And he lived a full life. He was in the first wave at Omaha Beach.
- 00:01:27,504 --> 00:01:30,798 I should've given you guys my black book when I got married.
- 00:01:30,965 --> 00:01:33,258 Although, it wasn't so much a book as a napkin.
- 00:01:34,636 --> 00:01:36,887 With Janice's phone number on it.
- 00:01:38,014 --> 00:01:40,724 Phoebe, isn't Jethro Tull a band?
- 00:01:45,105 --> 00:01:46,522 Oh, yes, they are.
- 00:02:27,939 --> 00:02:29,523 Hey, honey.
- 00:02:30,316 --> 00:02:31,859 Hey, sweetie.
- 00:02:32,485 --> 00:02:34,069 - Is Monica not here? - No.
- 00:02:34,237 --> 00:02:35,279 Oh, then I'll tell you.
- 00:02:35,446 --> 00:02:37,990 My agency was bidding for a big account, and they got it.
- 00:02:38,158 --> 00:02:40,659 - It's my first national commercial. - Cool.
- 00:02:40,827 --> 00:02:43,871 And I don't want to brag, but a lot of the ideas were mine.
- 00:02:44,038 --> 00:02:47,374 Hell, you weren't there. All the ideas were mine.
- 00:02:47,542 --> 00:02:50,752 That's great. Hey, can you cast me in it?
- 00:02:51,504 --> 00:02:54,006 Oh, I really don't think you're right for the part.
- 00:02:54,174 --> 00:02:57,467 What do you mean? I can do anything. I'm a chameleon, huh?
- 00:02:59,262 --> 00:03:01,180 [IN OLD MAN'S VOICE] I'm old.
- 00:03:02,432 --> 00:03:04,641 [YAWNING] Huh, I'm tired, huh?
- 00:03:04,809 --> 00:03:09,563 [IN NORMAL VOICE] Oh, I am hot. I'm cold, huh? Come on, what can't I do?
- 00:03:10,648 --> 00:03:12,983 First of all, bravo.
- 00:03:13,651 --> 00:03:15,777 Uh, but I don't think you're right for this.
- 00:03:15,945 --> 00:03:17,863 The part's a stuffy college professor.
- 00:03:18,031 --> 00:03:19,281 I can do that.
- 00:03:19,490 --> 00:03:21,992 Hello, I'm your professor.
- 00:03:22,160 --> 00:03:26,747 When I'm not busy thinking of important things, or professing...
- 00:03:28,082 --> 00:03:30,083 ...I like to use... Oh, what's the product?
- 00:03:30,251 --> 00:03:33,879 Software that facilitates inter-business networking e-solutions.
- 00:03:38,968 --> 00:03:40,219 I'm cold.
- 00:03:43,431 --> 00:03:44,973 - Hey. - Hey.
- 00:03:45,141 --> 00:03:47,643 Guess who's a finalist for a huge research grant?
- 00:03:47,810 --> 00:03:50,520 I'll give you a hint. He's looking right at you.
- 00:03:50,688 --> 00:03:54,399 Huh, well, unless it's the creepy guy with his hand up his kilt...
- 00:03:54,567 --> 00:03:56,068 ...I'm gonna say, "Congratulations."
- 00:03:56,236 --> 00:03:58,278 Ha, ha. Uh, I'm so excited.
- 00:03:58,446 --> 00:04:01,782 Apparently, I beat out hundreds of other applicants...
- 00:04:01,950 --> 00:04:04,534 ...including five guys I went to graduate school with.
- 00:04:04,702 --> 00:04:07,746 Not that I'm keeping score, or anything. Five.
- 00:04:08,665 --> 00:04:10,040 - Wow, that's great. - Yeah.
- 00:04:10,208 --> 00:04:13,752 - So tell me about the grant. - Well, okay, it's for $25,000.
- 00:04:13,920 --> 00:04:17,089 And if I get it, I'll finally be able to complete my field research.
- 00:04:17,298 --> 00:04:21,093 And there will be an article about me in the Paleontology Review.
- 00:04:21,261 --> 00:04:23,428 It'll be the first time my name is in there...
- 00:04:23,596 --> 00:04:26,598 ...without people raising serious questions about my work.
- 00:04:27,642 --> 00:04:30,852 - Are you talking about the Dewer Grant? - Yeah. Why?
- 00:04:31,020 --> 00:04:33,188 Benjamin Hobart is administering that grant.
- 00:04:33,356 --> 00:04:35,399 - Your ex-boyfriend? - Yeah.
- 00:04:35,566 --> 00:04:39,987 So your ex-boyfriend is gonna determine if your new boyfriend gets this grant?
- 00:04:40,154 --> 00:04:42,781 Wow, your new boyfriend is screwed.
- 00:04:43,283 --> 00:04:45,575 No. No, we ended on great terms.
- 00:04:45,743 --> 00:04:48,578 If anything, I think this could help you. You know what?
- 00:04:48,746 --> 00:04:51,832 Why don't we all go out to dinner, and I can introduce you.
- 00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:54,793 - If you think it'd help. - Yeah, absolutely. I'll call him.
- 00:04:54,961 --> 00:04:57,629 Now, is there anything I could do to butter him up?
- 00:04:57,797 --> 00:05:00,674 - Anything he really likes? - Hmm.
- 00:05:00,842 --> 00:05:03,010 He does have a pretty serious latex fetish.
- 00:05:03,219 --> 00:05:05,262 We'll see how dinner goes.
- 00:05:08,057 --> 00:05:09,099 [KNOCKING ON DOOR]
- 00:05:09,309 --> 00:05:12,352 - Hey. - Hey, you want to go see a movie?
- 00:05:12,520 --> 00:05:16,148 I told you I had to spend all day clearing out stuff so Mike could move in.
- 00:05:16,316 --> 00:05:18,066 - Oh, right. - Yeah.
- 00:05:18,234 --> 00:05:22,571 Now that I'm here, I might as well help with the cleaning and organizing.
- 00:05:22,739 --> 00:05:24,781 I just happen to have my label maker.
- 00:05:24,949 --> 00:05:26,450 [CHUCKLES]
- 00:05:26,617 --> 00:05:28,994 Oh, it's so hard to get rid of stuff.
- 00:05:29,203 --> 00:05:32,497 Did you and Chandler make compromises when you moved in together?
- 00:05:32,665 --> 00:05:34,291 Huh, Chandler did.
- 00:05:35,293 --> 00:05:37,794 - What does he want you to give up? - A bunch of stuff.
- 00:05:37,962 --> 00:05:39,463 And the worst one...
- 00:05:39,630 --> 00:05:41,131 He wants me to get rid of Gladys.
- 00:05:41,632 --> 00:05:43,425 Who's Gladys?
- 00:05:44,177 --> 00:05:45,510 [GASPS]
- 00:05:46,637 --> 00:05:49,431 - Oh, what a tragic loss. - Mm-hm.
- 00:05:50,099 --> 00:05:54,436 Yeah, I really hate to give her up. Oh, I know. Oh, you should take her.
- 00:05:57,190 --> 00:06:00,400 Oh, I... I don't know.
- 00:06:00,568 --> 00:06:06,156 - Oh, what, you don't like her? - Heh, of course I do. What's not to like?
- 00:06:06,866 --> 00:06:09,201 I'd take her in a minute.
- 00:06:09,494 --> 00:06:11,536 But I think that you're giving up too easy.
- 00:06:11,704 --> 00:06:14,331 I think that you need to fight for her.
- 00:06:15,124 --> 00:06:17,334 - Really, you think? - Absolutely.
- 00:06:17,543 --> 00:06:20,462 You say to him, "I'm sorry, Mike, I can't live without her.
- 00:06:20,630 --> 00:06:22,839 She means too much to me."
- 00:06:23,049 --> 00:06:26,635 Okay, I'll fight for her. Okay.
- 00:06:26,803 --> 00:06:30,305 Oh, wait. Oh, I just realized, if I do that, that means you don't get her.
- 00:06:30,473 --> 00:06:32,391 Damn it, I did not think this through.
- 00:06:36,437 --> 00:06:38,188 - Hey, guys. - Hi.
- 00:06:38,356 --> 00:06:40,148 Oh, any word on casting yet?
- 00:06:40,316 --> 00:06:43,485 - I told you, you're not right for the part. JOEY: What do you mean?
- 00:06:43,653 --> 00:06:47,781 Rach, don't I seem like a professor you'd buy some kind of e-crap from?
- 00:06:48,866 --> 00:06:52,452 I'm sorry, this sounds like something I'm never gonna be interested in.
- 00:06:53,246 --> 00:06:57,541 Look, come on, please? It's not like I'm asking you for some crazy favor.
- 00:06:57,708 --> 00:07:00,585 This is what I do for a living. I am a professional actor.
- 00:07:00,753 --> 00:07:02,712 Oh, man, I'm two hours late for work.
- 00:07:04,632 --> 00:07:07,843 Here's my reel. It's got all the commercials that I've been in.
- 00:07:08,010 --> 00:07:09,678 - Joe... - Uh, just watch it.
- 00:07:09,846 --> 00:07:12,639 If you don't like it, don't pass it on to your bosses.
- 00:07:12,807 --> 00:07:15,434 - Fine. - Thank you.
- 00:07:19,730 --> 00:07:22,441 - Work, Joe. - Damn it.
- 00:07:25,736 --> 00:07:28,196 - What am I gonna do now? - Just pass the tape along.
- 00:07:28,364 --> 00:07:30,198 He's not right for the part.
- 00:07:30,366 --> 00:07:32,868 If I suggest him, my bosses will think I'm an idiot.
- 00:07:33,035 --> 00:07:35,662 And that's something they should learn on their own.
- 00:07:35,830 --> 00:07:37,873 Oh, just tell Joey that you watched the tape...
- 00:07:38,040 --> 00:07:40,125 ...and you liked it, but your bosses didn't.
- 00:07:40,293 --> 00:07:42,794 Then you're the good guy, and they're the bad guy.
- 00:07:42,962 --> 00:07:45,964 That's good. I liked it, they didn't.
- 00:07:47,800 --> 00:07:50,385 Joey, for God's sake, go to work.
- 00:07:50,553 --> 00:07:52,804 [INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE]
- 00:07:55,808 --> 00:07:58,643 I can't believe I'm about to meet Benjamin Hobart.
- 00:07:58,811 --> 00:08:01,271 Um, I've always thought of him as someone I'd invite...
- 00:08:01,439 --> 00:08:03,899 ...to my fantasy dinner party, ha, ha.
- 00:08:04,901 --> 00:08:08,487 Do you think there's any chance he'll bring Christie Brinkley or C-3PO?
- 00:08:10,156 --> 00:08:12,782 Sorry, it looks like it's just him.
- 00:08:13,451 --> 00:08:14,493 [SIGHS]
- 00:08:14,660 --> 00:08:16,495 Charlie.
- 00:08:18,372 --> 00:08:22,167 - My God, you look absolutely stunning. - Oh.
- 00:08:22,335 --> 00:08:25,420 Well, I am having a good hair day.
- 00:08:26,297 --> 00:08:28,798 - It's so good to see you. CHARLIE: Oh, you too.
- 00:08:28,966 --> 00:08:30,008 BENJl: Mm.
- 00:08:30,218 --> 00:08:33,428 [CLEARS THROAT]
- 00:08:33,638 --> 00:08:35,013 Ahem, I'm okay.
- 00:08:35,181 --> 00:08:38,767 Um, I'm sorry. Um, Ross Geller, Benjamin Hobart.
- 00:08:38,935 --> 00:08:42,437 Oh, it's an honor to meet you. I can't tell you how long...
- 00:08:42,605 --> 00:08:47,067 ...I've been an admirer of your work. I mean, that Nobel Prize, uh, whoo!
- 00:08:47,235 --> 00:08:48,860 - Ha, ha. - Oh.
- 00:08:49,362 --> 00:08:53,448 I mean, I have to tell you that you're one of the reasons I got into the field.
- 00:08:53,616 --> 00:08:55,492 Oh, well, uh, likewise.
- 00:08:56,035 --> 00:08:59,663 Uh, not likewise. I'd never heard of you until this morning.
- 00:08:59,830 --> 00:09:01,414 But it's nice to be nice.
- 00:09:03,125 --> 00:09:06,962 - Uh, shall we? - Yeah, ahem. Thank you. Ahem.
- 00:09:09,715 --> 00:09:13,218 I can't believe that you chose this restaurant.
- 00:09:13,386 --> 00:09:17,430 - Do you remember the night? - Oh, my God. I completely forgot.
- 00:09:17,598 --> 00:09:19,224 BENJl: Ha-ha-ha. - Oh, my God.
- 00:09:19,392 --> 00:09:22,018 I can't believe they let us back in this place.
- 00:09:22,186 --> 00:09:26,273 [ALL LAUGHING]
- 00:09:30,111 --> 00:09:32,779 - You weren't there. - Ha, ha.
- 00:09:32,947 --> 00:09:36,116 No, but, you know, it's just a funny image.
- 00:09:36,284 --> 00:09:41,746 You know, the two of you in this restaurant with the hmm...
- 00:09:43,374 --> 00:09:47,419 Why don't you tell Benji about your proposal while I go to the ladies' room.
- 00:09:50,339 --> 00:09:52,048 So tell me about it.
- 00:09:52,216 --> 00:09:56,011 Okay. Well, I would like to do a dig in the Painted Desert.
- 00:09:56,178 --> 00:09:57,387 Mm-hm.
- 00:09:57,555 --> 00:10:00,181 There are still several areas that haven't been fully excavated.
- 00:10:00,349 --> 00:10:01,516 - Break up with Charlie. - What?
- 00:10:01,684 --> 00:10:03,059 What?
- 00:10:04,228 --> 00:10:08,273 Did you just say, "Break up with Charlie"?
- 00:10:09,400 --> 00:10:14,863 Well, yes and no. Yes, I did say it. And no, I didn't not say it.
- 00:10:15,031 --> 00:10:17,449 Um, kind of inappropriate, don't you think?
- 00:10:17,617 --> 00:10:19,701 Listen, I'm sorry.
- 00:10:19,910 --> 00:10:23,496 I just haven't seen her for so long, all these feelings are rushing back.
- 00:10:23,664 --> 00:10:25,999 I'm starting to realize how much I've missed her.
- 00:10:26,167 --> 00:10:28,543 And I'm gonna need you to break up with her.
- 00:10:30,796 --> 00:10:33,298 - Are you serious? - If you say, yes, then I'm serious.
- 00:10:33,466 --> 00:10:35,842 If you say, no, then I'm joking.
- 00:10:37,261 --> 00:10:39,054 - No. - Joking it is.
- 00:10:43,351 --> 00:10:46,061 - Hi, sorry I'm late. - Hey, how'd it go with Mike?
- 00:10:46,228 --> 00:10:50,231 - Is he gonna let you keep the painting? - Huh, no, he really hates it, ugh.
- 00:10:50,399 --> 00:10:53,234 But he's gonna let me keep my box of human hair.
- 00:10:54,570 --> 00:10:59,866 So you gotta pick your battles. But the good news is, Gladys is yours.
- 00:11:01,661 --> 00:11:04,162 Wow, what's the bad news?
- 00:11:04,580 --> 00:11:07,791 - Who's Gladys? - Oh, she's that work of art I made.
- 00:11:07,958 --> 00:11:10,710 You know, with the woman coming out of the frame.
- 00:11:10,878 --> 00:11:15,423 Ah, and Monica gets to keep her?
- 00:11:15,591 --> 00:11:18,677 In her house? I am so jealous.
- 00:11:20,763 --> 00:11:24,391 - Oh, I didn't know you wanted her too. - Oh.
- 00:11:24,934 --> 00:11:28,269 Well, I mean, sure, of course.
- 00:11:28,813 --> 00:11:30,939 But you already gave that to Monica, so...
- 00:11:31,107 --> 00:11:34,901 - You know, I would give her up for you. - No, I couldn't let you do that.
- 00:11:35,069 --> 00:11:37,404 - No, but I want to. - But I don't want you to.
- 00:11:37,571 --> 00:11:41,491 - But I insist. - But I insist harder.
- 00:11:43,285 --> 00:11:45,620 Girls. Girls. Stop. Okay, we'll flip a coin.
- 00:11:45,788 --> 00:11:48,248 Heads, she's Rachel's. Tails, she's Monica's.
- 00:11:50,167 --> 00:11:51,209 [MONICA GASPS]
- 00:11:51,419 --> 00:11:52,460 - Tails. RACHEL: Oh.
- 00:11:52,628 --> 00:11:55,213 - Monica, she's yours. - No, that landed in your food.
- 00:11:56,340 --> 00:12:00,385 No, no, that's okay. You won fair and square. I'm so sad.
- 00:12:03,597 --> 00:12:05,557 - Hey, Joe? - What's up?
- 00:12:05,725 --> 00:12:08,852 Bad news. I watched the tape and passed it along to my bosses...
- 00:12:09,019 --> 00:12:11,730 ...and they weren't interested. - Oh.
- 00:12:12,398 --> 00:12:13,732 I'm sorry, man.
- 00:12:16,277 --> 00:12:20,321 - But, uh, you watched the tape? - Yeah, I... I liked it.
- 00:12:21,574 --> 00:12:27,287 But, uh, my bosses didn't go for it. Stupid sons of bitches.
- 00:12:31,709 --> 00:12:36,212 - You didn't watch the tape. - What? Of course I did.
- 00:12:36,380 --> 00:12:39,215 Look, it's one thing not to cast me, but to lie to me?
- 00:12:39,383 --> 00:12:42,510 - I'm not lying to you. I watched it. - Ah, you lied again.
- 00:12:42,678 --> 00:12:45,805 - I watched it. - Keep going, Pinocchio.
- 00:12:47,141 --> 00:12:48,892 - I did. - No, you didn't!
- 00:12:49,059 --> 00:12:51,144 I'm telling you, I watched the tape.
- 00:12:53,272 --> 00:12:55,857 - Did you watch the tape? - No.
- 00:12:59,445 --> 00:13:02,781 The selection committee has chosen the three of you as our finalists.
- 00:13:02,948 --> 00:13:06,618 The decision will be based on the answers you give to the questions I ask.
- 00:13:06,786 --> 00:13:10,914 We'll start with Dr. Li. You claim the field is too reliant...
- 00:13:11,081 --> 00:13:14,959 ...on the Linnaean taxonomic system. How do you propose to correct this?
- 00:13:15,127 --> 00:13:18,296 I believe that the answers lie in the osteological evidence.
- 00:13:18,464 --> 00:13:20,298 - I plan to begin there. - Interesting.
- 00:13:20,466 --> 00:13:22,759 I guess.
- 00:13:23,427 --> 00:13:27,305 Dr. Biely, your proposal includes some fieldwork. Where might that take place?
- 00:13:27,473 --> 00:13:30,183 Primarily in the Pierre Shale region of South Dakota.
- 00:13:30,351 --> 00:13:34,813 Certainly. Very well. And Dr. Geller, when is my birthday?
- 00:13:41,237 --> 00:13:43,029 What? I... Uh.
- 00:13:45,032 --> 00:13:47,200 Care to venture a guess?
- 00:13:49,703 --> 00:13:53,748 - May 12? - That's not even kind of close.
- 00:13:54,792 --> 00:13:57,126 Dr. Li, how many graduate students will you need?
- 00:13:57,336 --> 00:13:59,295 - Half a dozen. - I see. And Dr. Biely?
- 00:13:59,463 --> 00:14:01,798 Three for excavation, and two for analysis.
- 00:14:01,966 --> 00:14:05,802 Certainly. Dr. Geller, which 1965 Shirelles hit...
- 00:14:05,970 --> 00:14:09,180 ...was later covered by a popular British Invasion band?
- 00:14:11,225 --> 00:14:12,809 [MOUTHS] What?
- 00:14:12,977 --> 00:14:15,478 What? I need six graduate students.
- 00:14:15,688 --> 00:14:19,399 No, I'm sorry. We were looking for "Baby It's You."
- 00:14:19,817 --> 00:14:20,984 "Baby It's You."
- 00:14:22,778 --> 00:14:24,904 What? Wait just a minute.
- 00:14:25,072 --> 00:14:28,283 None of my questions have anything to do with paleontology.
- 00:14:28,450 --> 00:14:30,952 You're right, I apologize. Scratch the last question.
- 00:14:31,120 --> 00:14:33,329 Spell "Boscodictiasaur."
- 00:14:34,582 --> 00:14:38,918 Um, I've never heard of a "Boscodictiasaur."
- 00:14:39,086 --> 00:14:41,129 Yeah, I just made it up. Spell it.
- 00:14:44,300 --> 00:14:47,760 - Okay. B-O... - No, it starts with a silent M.
- 00:14:47,928 --> 00:14:50,096 Oh, come on!
- 00:14:56,812 --> 00:15:00,481 I can't believe Joey. I hate being called a liar.
- 00:15:00,691 --> 00:15:02,066 But you are a liar.
- 00:15:03,485 --> 00:15:05,361 What did I just say?
- 00:15:06,614 --> 00:15:08,072 - Are you still here? CHANDLER: Yes.
- 00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:12,702 And I'm not just hurt, I'm insulted. When I tell somebody I did something...
- 00:15:12,870 --> 00:15:17,040 Okay, hold on, let me just stop you right there, okay? First, you lied. Right?
- 00:15:17,207 --> 00:15:19,792 Then you lied about lying, okay?
- 00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:22,879 Then you lied about lying about lying, okay?
- 00:15:23,047 --> 00:15:28,593 So before you lie about lying about lying about lying about lying...
- 00:15:30,429 --> 00:15:32,347 Stop lying.
- 00:15:32,514 --> 00:15:35,141 Why are you so sure I didn't watch this tape?
- 00:15:35,309 --> 00:15:37,518 You wanna know why? You wanna know why?
- 00:15:37,937 --> 00:15:39,854 Well, this is going well.
- 00:15:41,315 --> 00:15:42,982 Here's how I know.
- 00:15:43,150 --> 00:15:48,029 If you had seen what was on this tape, believe me, you'd have some comments.
- 00:15:48,197 --> 00:15:50,990 All right, remember, I got paid a lot of money for this...
- 00:15:51,158 --> 00:15:53,576 ...and it only aired in Japan.
- 00:15:54,203 --> 00:15:55,244 Ichiban.
- 00:15:55,412 --> 00:15:57,121 [FUNKY MUSIC PLAYING ON TV]
- 00:15:57,289 --> 00:16:15,264 Ichiban, lipstick for men.
- 00:16:15,432 --> 00:16:16,933 [SPEAKS IN JAPANESE]
- 00:16:19,103 --> 00:16:21,396 And that's how I know you didn't watch the tape.
- 00:16:22,231 --> 00:16:23,815 [DOOR SLAMS]
- 00:16:24,566 --> 00:16:26,859 He really is a chameleon.
- 00:16:33,784 --> 00:16:37,996 Well, Gladys, say hello to your new home.
- 00:16:41,166 --> 00:16:43,918 - Oh, my. - Wow.
- 00:16:44,086 --> 00:16:47,880 Oh, she is so nice and big.
- 00:16:49,091 --> 00:16:55,263 Oh, Monica, where are you going to display Gladys, oh, so proudly?
- 00:16:55,681 --> 00:16:58,725 I haven't really settled on a spot yet.
- 00:16:58,934 --> 00:17:00,560 How about right above the TV?
- 00:17:00,728 --> 00:17:05,231 That way, it will be the first thing that you see when you walk in the door.
- 00:17:06,358 --> 00:17:09,944 Yeah, yeah, and you can get rid of that French poster.
- 00:17:10,112 --> 00:17:12,030 - I like that poster. PHOEBE: Really?
- 00:17:12,531 --> 00:17:14,615 It doesn't have anything coming out of it.
- 00:17:15,492 --> 00:17:18,161 Or maybe there's someplace for her in your bedroom?
- 00:17:18,328 --> 00:17:21,039 - Oh, there's nothing above your bed. - Are you still here?
- 00:17:25,711 --> 00:17:27,503 Oh, hi. Hello.
- 00:17:27,671 --> 00:17:31,424 Uh, have you come to ask me some more paleontology-related questions?
- 00:17:31,592 --> 00:17:34,218 Um, your grandmother's nickname, perhaps?
- 00:17:34,386 --> 00:17:36,137 Ann-Margret's pant size?
- 00:17:38,640 --> 00:17:43,019 I've come here to apologize. I think I may have let my feelings...
- 00:17:43,187 --> 00:17:46,064 ...for Charlie interfere with the interview process.
- 00:17:46,231 --> 00:17:48,357 No. Stop!
- 00:17:49,068 --> 00:17:51,986 Anyway, I decided to offer you the grant.
- 00:17:53,697 --> 00:17:58,159 - Really? - There is just, uh, one small stipulation.
- 00:17:58,660 --> 00:18:01,454 - I have to break up with Charlie? - Hey, you got one right.
- 00:18:04,124 --> 00:18:08,419 - You're crazy. - Crazy or romantic?
- 00:18:09,046 --> 00:18:10,254 Crazy.
- 00:18:12,841 --> 00:18:14,467 - Or? - Get out!
- 00:18:21,391 --> 00:18:22,475 Oh, my God!
- 00:18:22,643 --> 00:18:24,519 [RACHEL GASPS]
- 00:18:24,686 --> 00:18:28,940 - What? - Joey, what is this thing doing here?
- 00:18:29,108 --> 00:18:33,945 I got her from Monica. She sold it to me for a very reasonable price.
- 00:18:34,113 --> 00:18:37,740 - Joey, we're not keeping this. - But it's an original Buffay.
- 00:18:40,953 --> 00:18:43,663 All right, fine. You can keep it.
- 00:18:43,831 --> 00:18:46,207 As long as you don't mind that she's haunted.
- 00:18:46,375 --> 00:18:47,875 Hey, what? Whoa. What?
- 00:18:48,418 --> 00:18:52,839 Well, legend has it, Joey, that she comes alive when you're asleep.
- 00:18:55,217 --> 00:18:58,136 She climbs out of the frame...
- 00:18:58,303 --> 00:19:02,557 ...and then drags her half-a-body across the floor...
- 00:19:02,724 --> 00:19:04,559 ...just looking for legs to steal.
- 00:19:04,768 --> 00:19:05,893 [GASPS]
- 00:19:06,061 --> 00:19:08,354 And then with her one good hand...
- 00:19:08,522 --> 00:19:12,525 ...she slowly reaches up...
- 00:19:12,693 --> 00:19:14,944 ...and turns your doorknob.
- 00:19:15,112 --> 00:19:18,739 Get that legless witch out of here!
- 00:19:24,246 --> 00:19:27,331 - Hey, I sold that to Joey. - Yeah, well, I told him it's haunted.
- 00:19:27,499 --> 00:19:30,501 - Two can play at this game. - Too late. You can't give it back.
- 00:19:30,669 --> 00:19:32,920 - Oh, yes, I can. - No, you can't, she's yours.
- 00:19:33,088 --> 00:19:34,338 - She's yours. - She's yours.
- 00:19:34,506 --> 00:19:37,008 - She's yours. - Hey.
- 00:19:38,552 --> 00:19:42,138 - She's mine. - She's mine.
- 00:19:42,306 --> 00:19:45,433 You guys, you don't have to fight over her anymore.
- 00:19:45,934 --> 00:19:49,312 Whoever doesn't get Gladys, gets Glynnis.
- 00:19:57,404 --> 00:19:58,988 - I want Gladys. - She's mine.
- 00:19:59,156 --> 00:20:00,323 - She's mine. - She's mine.
- 00:20:00,490 --> 00:20:02,325 [MONICA SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY]
- 00:20:05,287 --> 00:20:07,955 Look, I'm sorry I didn't give them your tape.
- 00:20:08,123 --> 00:20:12,168 And I promise next time to submit you, whether I think you're right or not.
- 00:20:12,336 --> 00:20:15,296 That's not the point, Chandler. The point is that you lied.
- 00:20:15,464 --> 00:20:17,298 I know. You're right.
- 00:20:17,466 --> 00:20:20,051 Oh, what's it gonna take for you to forgive me?
- 00:20:20,260 --> 00:20:21,344 Oh, my God.
- 00:20:24,765 --> 00:20:27,642 Oh, excellent.
- 00:20:28,602 --> 00:20:31,020 Now what do you say?
- 00:20:31,188 --> 00:20:33,397 Lying is wrong.
- 00:20:33,565 --> 00:20:36,025 And? And?
- 00:20:37,819 --> 00:20:39,570 I'm a pretty little girl.
- 00:20:42,324 --> 00:20:43,699 I knew it. Ha, ha.
- 00:20:51,333 --> 00:20:53,751 Your ex-boyfriend is insane.
- 00:20:55,337 --> 00:20:57,797 - Did you get the grant? - No. And you wanna know why?
- 00:20:57,965 --> 00:21:01,342 Because your ex-boyfriend is still in love with you.
- 00:21:01,510 --> 00:21:02,551 What?
- 00:21:02,719 --> 00:21:05,096 He refused me because I wouldn't give you up.
- 00:21:05,264 --> 00:21:08,474 Benji isn't in love with me. I mean, he broke up with me.
- 00:21:08,642 --> 00:21:12,895 - And besides, he's a very ethical man. - Really?
- 00:21:13,814 --> 00:21:16,482 Is it ethical to ask someone in a grant review:
- 00:21:16,650 --> 00:21:18,526 "Who was the voice of Underdog?"
- 00:21:19,403 --> 00:21:20,861 I'm sure he was just joking.
- 00:21:21,029 --> 00:21:23,364 If you don't believe me, let's go talk to him.
- 00:21:23,532 --> 00:21:26,575 I'm telling you, he didn't ask me one paleontological question.
- 00:21:26,743 --> 00:21:29,829 - Seriously? - Oh, I'm sorry. No, he did ask me one:
- 00:21:29,997 --> 00:21:32,164 Uh, "How do you spell Boscodictiasaur?"
- 00:21:32,332 --> 00:21:35,876 Well, if it's like the Lake Mbosco in Congo, then M-B-O...
- 00:21:36,044 --> 00:21:37,211 Damn it.
- 00:21:40,882 --> 00:21:44,093 Dr. Geller. Charlie, what are you doing here?
- 00:21:44,261 --> 00:21:46,137 I want you to tell her everything.
- 00:21:46,305 --> 00:21:50,016 About the deal you tried to make with me, about the crazy questions you...
- 00:21:50,183 --> 00:21:55,479 Wally Cox. That's the voice of Underdog.
- 00:21:56,273 --> 00:21:58,357 Like I tried to tell you in the interview...
- 00:21:58,525 --> 00:22:02,611 ...this grant is not based on your knowledge of pretty useless trivia.
- 00:22:02,779 --> 00:22:07,658 No, don't do that. I want you to look her in the eyes and tell her the truth.
- 00:22:08,910 --> 00:22:09,952 Benji?
- 00:22:11,163 --> 00:22:15,916 It's true. I behaved horribly, but it's only because I still love you.
- 00:22:16,084 --> 00:22:19,086 And I would do anything to have you back in my life.
- 00:22:19,254 --> 00:22:21,881 Too little, too late, Benji.
- 00:22:23,008 --> 00:22:27,136 - I can't believe this. - I never should've broken up with you.
- 00:22:27,304 --> 00:22:32,350 I think about you all the time. Do you ever still think about me?
- 00:22:32,517 --> 00:22:34,143 No.
- 00:22:34,936 --> 00:22:37,188 - Yes. - What?
- 00:22:38,023 --> 00:22:41,901 I don't know what to say, Benji. This is all so...
- 00:22:42,069 --> 00:22:44,278 ...romantic.
- 00:22:44,738 --> 00:22:46,822 Or?
- 00:22:48,992 --> 00:22:51,202 I know I may be way out of bounds here...
- 00:22:51,370 --> 00:22:54,830 ...but is there any chance you would take me back?
- 00:22:57,459 --> 00:22:59,293 Maybe.
- 00:22:59,753 --> 00:23:03,589 Sweetie, this conversation is starting to make me a little uncomfortable.
- 00:23:05,300 --> 00:23:09,053 Oh, God. I am so sorry, but...
- 00:23:09,221 --> 00:23:14,016 I mean, there's so much history between us, you know?
- 00:23:14,184 --> 00:23:16,602 I'm sorry too.
- 00:23:24,403 --> 00:23:28,322 - I love you. - Oh, I love you too.
- 00:23:30,409 --> 00:23:33,411 Okay, that's it, we are seeing other people.
- 00:23:42,921 --> 00:23:46,590 [SCRATCHING ON DOOR]
- 00:23:53,723 --> 00:23:54,765 Gladys?
- 00:23:56,184 --> 00:23:57,893 [SCREAMS]
- 00:24:00,564 --> 00:24:01,647 [RACHEL LAUGHS]
- 00:24:01,815 --> 00:24:05,568 For the third time this week. Man, this does not get old.
- 00:24:05,735 --> 00:24:06,777 [RACHEL LAUGHS]
- 00:24:06,945 --> 00:24:10,906 - You're mean! - Oh, don't be such a baby. Please.
- 00:24:11,074 --> 00:24:13,492 [SCREAMS]
- 00:24:16,455 --> 00:24:17,621 [DOOR CLOSES]
- 00:24:17,789 --> 00:24:19,039 [LAUGHING]
- 00:24:22,711 --> 00:24:24,712 [English - US - SDH]
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