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Эпизод со сном Рэйчел
The One with Rachel's Dream
Сезон: 09Серия: 19
Описание
Увидев, как Джои репетирует, а затем снимает сцену из сериала «Дни нашей жизни», Рейчел влюбляется в него. Во сне она целует Джои. Фиби выступает с уличной музыкой в ресторане Моники, к большому неудовольствию Моники. Чендлер планирует провести выходные в Вермонте с Моникой, но вынужден взять с собой Росса, так как Моника не может этого сделать. Там Росс, объевшись сахара, предлагает украсть все ненужные вещи из отеля после того, как отель заберет у Чендлера 600 долларов. Когда они это делают и пытаются уйти, их чемодан выпадает, и все вещи рассыпаются.
Субтитры
- 00:00:03,504 --> 00:00:05,381 God, you're beautiful.
- 00:00:06,090 --> 00:00:08,384 Why are we fighting this?
- 00:00:08,718 --> 00:00:12,722 You know you want it to happen as much as I do.
- 00:00:12,888 --> 00:00:16,976 I want you. I need you.
- 00:00:19,437 --> 00:00:21,981 Let me make love to you.
- 00:00:22,148 --> 00:00:24,984 I don't wanna stand in the way of, uh, true love or anything...
- 00:00:25,151 --> 00:00:28,487 ...but I think a cantaloupe might hurt less.
- 00:00:28,654 --> 00:00:31,073 No, I'm, uh, rehearsing my lines.
- 00:00:31,240 --> 00:00:34,035 They're giving me a romantic story on Days of our Lives.
- 00:00:34,243 --> 00:00:37,955 It's the first time my character's got one. I'm nervous. I want it to be good.
- 00:00:38,122 --> 00:00:42,626 Wow, I haven't seen you this worked-up since you did that dog-food commercial...
- 00:00:42,793 --> 00:00:47,006 ...and you thought you were gonna be with a real talking dog.
- 00:00:47,173 --> 00:00:49,759 Yeah, that was a disappointment.
- 00:00:49,925 --> 00:00:53,846 Ooh, hey, you wanna, uh, come down to the set and tell me if I'm doing okay?
- 00:00:54,055 --> 00:00:55,639 - Are you serious? - Yeah.
- 00:00:55,848 --> 00:00:58,642 You just have to promise not to get thrown out again.
- 00:00:58,809 --> 00:01:01,562 - That was an honest mistake. - Right.
- 00:01:01,729 --> 00:01:06,150 "Oh, my God. Is this the men's room? I feel so foolish.
- 00:01:06,317 --> 00:01:10,154 Have you always known you wanted to be an actor?"
- 00:01:11,197 --> 00:01:14,366 Yeah, that was an awesome day.
- 00:01:52,488 --> 00:01:55,324 - Hey! ROSS <i>&</i> PHOEBE: Hey.
- 00:01:55,491 --> 00:01:58,953 You guys wanna come eat dinner at the restaurant in the next few weeks?
- 00:01:59,161 --> 00:02:00,412 - Sure! - I'd love to.
- 00:02:00,663 --> 00:02:01,872 Well, you can't.
- 00:02:03,207 --> 00:02:06,752 - We're booked solid for the next month. - Well, I can't give you a massage...
- 00:02:06,919 --> 00:02:10,381 ...because my license has been revoked again.
- 00:02:10,548 --> 00:02:14,135 - Phoebe, what happened? - Well, it was an accident, you know.
- 00:02:14,301 --> 00:02:17,721 It's a lot of oil and sometimes the hand just slips.
- 00:02:19,515 --> 00:02:22,309 Have I got a surprise for you. Pack your bags.
- 00:02:22,476 --> 00:02:26,897 Oh, no. You guys aren't supposed to get divorced for seven years.
- 00:02:28,482 --> 00:02:31,735 What? No, I'm taking Monica to a romantic inn in Vermont.
- 00:02:31,902 --> 00:02:37,491 Oh, good. Okay, good for you. Trying to recapture the magic.
- 00:02:38,868 --> 00:02:41,203 - So can you get out of work? - Honey, I can't.
- 00:02:41,370 --> 00:02:45,124 - Things are crazy at the restaurant. - You're really that busy?
- 00:02:45,332 --> 00:02:48,002 Yeah. I'm sorry, I really am.
- 00:02:48,169 --> 00:02:51,505 CHANDLER: That's okay. I'll just, uh, try and reschedule.
- 00:02:52,965 --> 00:02:56,093 Hi, this is Chandler Bing. I made a reservation there...
- 00:02:56,260 --> 00:02:58,053 ...and I need to change it.
- 00:02:58,846 --> 00:03:02,933 What do you mean it's nonrefundable? Well, can I just come some other time?
- 00:03:04,018 --> 00:03:05,603 Can't you make an exception?
- 00:03:05,811 --> 00:03:08,606 Tell them I'm a chef at a big New York restaurant.
- 00:03:08,814 --> 00:03:13,235 Tell them that in two weeks, I will once again be a masseuse in good standing.
- 00:03:14,612 --> 00:03:18,282 Look, this is ridiculous. I'm not paying for that room, okay?
- 00:03:18,449 --> 00:03:21,327 Well, thank you very much.
- 00:03:21,744 --> 00:03:24,496 Yeah, I'm going to Vermont.
- 00:03:24,663 --> 00:03:28,584 - Don't worry, use your travel insurance. - I don't have travel insurance.
- 00:03:28,792 --> 00:03:33,214 Well, this is what happens when people live on the edge.
- 00:03:33,422 --> 00:03:34,590 Why don't you take Ross?
- 00:03:34,840 --> 00:03:40,012 Heh. Don't you think that'll be a little weird? I mean, two guys in a romantic inn?
- 00:03:40,304 --> 00:03:44,099 - No, not if the room has two beds. - I guess.
- 00:03:44,266 --> 00:03:48,187 It still seems a little-- "Moonlight boat ride"?
- 00:03:52,983 --> 00:03:55,945 Joey, is this the bed where Olivia lost her virginity?
- 00:03:56,153 --> 00:03:58,864 I don't know, but one of the extras sure did.
- 00:03:59,031 --> 00:04:02,493 Listen, Rach. Thanks again for coming down to watch my scenes.
- 00:04:02,701 --> 00:04:06,205 Please, honey. Just the fact that you want me here to support you, I'm--
- 00:04:06,372 --> 00:04:11,210 Oh, my God. Is that Christian Saunders? He is so gorgeous!
- 00:04:11,418 --> 00:04:14,088 And also, so gay.
- 00:04:14,255 --> 00:04:18,175 Well, in my head, he's done some pretty not-gay stuff.
- 00:04:18,384 --> 00:04:22,763 Well, at the Christmas party, him and Santa did some definitely-gay stuff.
- 00:04:22,930 --> 00:04:24,890 Joey? Joey, we're ready for you.
- 00:04:25,057 --> 00:04:27,351 RACHEL: Oh. Ahem. JOEY: Okay. All right, wish me luck.
- 00:04:27,518 --> 00:04:31,230 Okay. Not that you need it, but good-- God! Is that Chase Lassiter?
- 00:04:31,563 --> 00:04:34,650 - He's straight, right? - Rash, if you weren't here wondering...
- 00:04:34,817 --> 00:04:38,362 ...if these guys were gay, I don't know if I could do this.
- 00:04:38,570 --> 00:04:42,825 - I'm sorry, you're right. I'm sorry. Good luck. MAN: On a bell, please.
- 00:04:42,992 --> 00:04:44,034 [BUZZER BUZZES]
- 00:04:44,201 --> 00:04:45,494 Quietly.
- 00:04:45,661 --> 00:04:47,371 And action!
- 00:04:47,538 --> 00:04:48,580 [DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS]
- 00:04:48,747 --> 00:04:50,499 OLMA: Drake, what are you doing here?
- 00:04:50,666 --> 00:04:52,710 Stopping you from marrying the wrong man...
- 00:04:52,876 --> 00:04:54,962 ...and making the biggest mistake of your life.
- 00:04:55,170 --> 00:04:57,298 - Get out. - You don't love him.
- 00:04:57,506 --> 00:04:59,049 What do you know about love?
- 00:04:59,258 --> 00:05:02,011 I know what I felt that night when we kissed under the bridge.
- 00:05:02,219 --> 00:05:05,556 OLMA: That kiss never happened. - Well, what about this one?
- 00:05:05,723 --> 00:05:07,516 [RACHEL GASPS]
- 00:05:07,975 --> 00:05:10,769 OLMA: Now, I told you to get out.
- 00:05:10,936 --> 00:05:12,896 JOEY [AS DRAKE]: Fine, I'll go.
- 00:05:13,814 --> 00:05:15,649 But let me ask you one question.
- 00:05:15,816 --> 00:05:20,070 - You look real familiar. Have we--? - Shh! He's asking her a question.
- 00:05:20,988 --> 00:05:24,992 Can you live the rest of your life never knowing what we could have been?
- 00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:28,162 - I don't have a choice. - Yes, you do.
- 00:05:28,329 --> 00:05:32,916 Yes, you do. I'm the one who doesn't have a choice because I...
- 00:05:33,083 --> 00:05:36,170 Because I can't stop loving you.
- 00:05:36,337 --> 00:05:40,215 OLMA: Don't say that. JOEY [AS DRAKE]: Tell me to stop.
- 00:05:40,507 --> 00:05:42,593 Just"
- 00:05:43,135 --> 00:05:46,263 ...tell me to stop.
- 00:05:46,472 --> 00:05:49,224 MAN: Cut! - No!
- 00:05:50,351 --> 00:05:53,854 Or, cut. You know, that's your call.
- 00:05:55,731 --> 00:05:57,733 - Everything was delicious. - Thank you.
- 00:05:57,900 --> 00:06:00,444 It was. The duck in particular was superb.
- 00:06:00,611 --> 00:06:02,946 Thank you.
- 00:06:05,657 --> 00:06:07,993 You haven't said anything.
- 00:06:08,202 --> 00:06:10,704 Actually, I do have one small complaint.
- 00:06:10,871 --> 00:06:15,501 Oh, well, please, I welcome criticism.
- 00:06:16,168 --> 00:06:19,463 The musician right outside the restaurant is kind of a mood killer.
- 00:06:19,671 --> 00:06:20,756 What musician?
- 00:06:21,006 --> 00:06:23,926 <i>[SINGING] And there's</i> a <i>country called Argentina</i>
- 00:06:24,093 --> 00:06:26,720 <i>It's a place I've never seen</i>
- 00:06:26,887 --> 00:06:33,185 <i>But I'm told for 50 pesos You can buy a human spleen</i>
- 00:06:33,352 --> 00:06:37,231 <i>Human spleen</i>
- 00:06:37,398 --> 00:06:38,607 <i>Olé!</i>
- 00:06:40,734 --> 00:06:42,152 What are you doing here?
- 00:06:42,361 --> 00:06:46,365 You said you had customers lined up in the street, so I'm here to entertain.
- 00:06:46,532 --> 00:06:49,326 - Great. - Yeah, it really has been great too.
- 00:06:49,535 --> 00:06:51,453 They must have seen me play before...
- 00:06:51,620 --> 00:06:54,081 ...because they requested a bunch of my songs.
- 00:06:54,248 --> 00:06:56,625 Yeah, "You Suck"...
- 00:06:56,792 --> 00:06:58,710 ...and, um, "Shut Up and Go Home."
- 00:07:00,546 --> 00:07:02,005 - Listen, Phoebe. - Yeah.
- 00:07:02,172 --> 00:07:05,050 You know how much I love listening to your music...
- 00:07:05,217 --> 00:07:08,095 -...but... - But what?
- 00:07:08,262 --> 00:07:13,183 Um, this is kind of a classy place.
- 00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:14,893 Okay, say no more.
- 00:07:15,102 --> 00:07:19,064 <i>[SINGING] It wasn't just that she was fat The woman smelled like garbage</i>
- 00:07:19,231 --> 00:07:20,274 [IN NORMAL VOICE] Everyone!
- 00:07:20,441 --> 00:07:25,404 <i>[SINGING] It wasn't just that she was fat The woman smelled like garbage</i>
- 00:07:25,863 --> 00:07:27,531 [IN NORMAL VOICE] Classy, huh?
- 00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:35,080 Hi, Chandler Bing. I have a reservation.
- 00:07:35,247 --> 00:07:38,125 Welcome to the Chestnut Inn. Where are you joining us from?
- 00:07:38,333 --> 00:07:41,336 - New York. - The Big Apple.
- 00:07:41,503 --> 00:07:45,549 He's wound up. We had to stop at every maple-candy stand on the way here.
- 00:07:45,716 --> 00:07:48,969 I ate all my gifts for everybody.
- 00:07:50,471 --> 00:07:53,724 I'm sorry, there's no record of your reservation in the computer.
- 00:07:53,932 --> 00:07:58,729 - That's impossible. Check again, please. - Check again, please.
- 00:07:59,688 --> 00:08:03,317 - I'm sorry, it's not here. - It's not there.
- 00:08:03,484 --> 00:08:07,029 Let me get this straight. I called to try to cancel my reservation...
- 00:08:07,196 --> 00:08:11,033 ...was told it's not refundable. We drove six hours all the way up here...
- 00:08:11,200 --> 00:08:14,369 -...and now we don't have a reservation? - I don't know what to say.
- 00:08:14,578 --> 00:08:16,788 She doesn't know what to say.
- 00:08:16,955 --> 00:08:19,082 Just give us the cheapest room you have.
- 00:08:19,291 --> 00:08:23,295 The only thing we have available is our deluxe suite. The rate is $600.
- 00:08:23,504 --> 00:08:25,923 - That's insane. - It's totally insane.
- 00:08:26,089 --> 00:08:30,135 Let's drive home. We'll hit all the maple-candy stores on the way back...
- 00:08:30,302 --> 00:08:36,350 ...and if they're closed, then maybe we'll tap a tree and make some ourselves.
- 00:08:36,517 --> 00:08:40,604 Does that room have a closet I can lock him in?
- 00:08:41,230 --> 00:08:44,316 - We'll take it. - Great.
- 00:08:44,525 --> 00:08:47,486 - They are totally ripping us off! - Dude, don't worry about it.
- 00:08:47,653 --> 00:08:51,740 I know how to make your money back. This is a nice hotel. Plenty of amenities.
- 00:08:51,907 --> 00:08:56,119 We just load up on those. Like those apples. Instead of taking one...
- 00:08:56,286 --> 00:08:59,122 ...um, I take six.
- 00:08:59,706 --> 00:09:03,418 Great. At $100 an apple, we're there.
- 00:09:03,585 --> 00:09:07,881 Come on, you get the idea. You know, we'll make our money back in no time.
- 00:09:08,090 --> 00:09:12,928 - Dude, you're shaking. - It's the sugar. Could you hold the apple?
- 00:09:17,724 --> 00:09:19,142 RACHEL: Hi. - Hey.
- 00:09:19,309 --> 00:09:24,106 Joey, I got to tell you, I have been thinking all day about that scene you did.
- 00:09:24,273 --> 00:09:26,358 - You were amazing. - Oh.
- 00:09:26,650 --> 00:09:29,903 You know, the writing was good. And the director's good.
- 00:09:30,070 --> 00:09:32,197 And my costar's good.
- 00:09:32,364 --> 00:09:34,408 But they're not as good as me!
- 00:09:35,909 --> 00:09:38,036 You have to tell me what happens tomorrow.
- 00:09:38,245 --> 00:09:41,039 I'm going over the script now. Wanna read lines with me?
- 00:09:41,206 --> 00:09:44,668 Me? Oh, I'm not an actress.
- 00:09:44,876 --> 00:09:47,296 - I can ask Monica. - Screw her! That part is mine!
- 00:09:47,504 --> 00:09:48,714 JOEY: Right.
- 00:09:48,880 --> 00:09:51,675 Okay, so, uh, just from the top of the page right here.
- 00:09:51,842 --> 00:09:53,427 Okay.
- 00:09:53,594 --> 00:09:54,636 [SIGHS]
- 00:09:56,513 --> 00:09:59,850 Hello, Drake. I'm surprised to see you here.
- 00:10:00,058 --> 00:10:03,353 - I can't believe you married him. - Well, what choice did I have?
- 00:10:03,520 --> 00:10:06,815 He was keeping my sister in a dungeon.
- 00:10:09,443 --> 00:10:12,696 So, what about us? Everything we feel for each other?
- 00:10:12,904 --> 00:10:15,365 It's over. You have to accept that.
- 00:10:15,532 --> 00:10:20,037 How can I, knowing I'll never hold you in my arms again...
- 00:10:20,203 --> 00:10:24,249 ...or touch your skin or feel your lips...
- 00:10:24,833 --> 00:10:27,961 ...knowing I'll never make love to you?
- 00:10:28,128 --> 00:10:31,131 How can I accept that I can never kiss you again...
- 00:10:31,298 --> 00:10:34,301 ...when it's all I can do not to kiss you right now?
- 00:10:37,638 --> 00:10:38,805 Kiss me.
- 00:10:40,057 --> 00:10:41,767 What?
- 00:10:42,559 --> 00:10:43,894 Kiss me.
- 00:10:44,102 --> 00:10:49,483 - Uh, Rach, it doesn't say that. - No, I'm saying it.
- 00:10:49,650 --> 00:10:52,486 - But-- - Just don't talk.
- 00:10:54,112 --> 00:10:55,697 [GASPS]
- 00:10:59,618 --> 00:11:01,578 Well, that's new.
- 00:11:10,671 --> 00:11:14,132 Hi, this is Ross Geller in suite 206.
- 00:11:14,341 --> 00:11:16,093 Um, I've forgotten a couple of things.
- 00:11:16,259 --> 00:11:20,555 Could you have some complimentary toiletries sent up to my room?
- 00:11:20,722 --> 00:11:24,518 Thank you. Okay, a toothbrush, toothpaste...
- 00:11:24,685 --> 00:11:30,732 ...razor, mouthwash, deodorant, floss, Band-Aids, shaving cream, after shave.
- 00:11:30,899 --> 00:11:32,526 And I feel like I'm forgetting something.
- 00:11:32,693 --> 00:11:37,781 Um, is there anything else you have that I haven't asked for already?
- 00:11:38,073 --> 00:11:41,284 Yeah, go ahead, send up some tampons.
- 00:11:43,704 --> 00:11:45,330 - What'd you get? - USA Today.
- 00:11:45,497 --> 00:11:47,499 Nice. Put it with the others.
- 00:11:47,749 --> 00:11:51,712 And I also got two more apples.
- 00:11:51,920 --> 00:11:53,839 We're four short of a bushel!
- 00:11:54,798 --> 00:11:58,844 God, I feel so alive. I love being in the country!
- 00:11:59,010 --> 00:12:01,346 Also, got these great salt and pepper shakers...
- 00:12:01,513 --> 00:12:03,807 -...from the restaurant. - That's not cool.
- 00:12:05,016 --> 00:12:07,728 Dude, none of this is cool.
- 00:12:08,311 --> 00:12:11,898 Look, Chandler, you have to find the line between stealing...
- 00:12:12,065 --> 00:12:14,359 ...and taking what the hotel owes you.
- 00:12:14,526 --> 00:12:17,362 For example: a hair dryer, no, no, no.
- 00:12:17,571 --> 00:12:20,657 But shampoos and conditioners, yes,yes,yes.
- 00:12:21,950 --> 00:12:25,412 Now, the salt shaker is off limits. Ah.
- 00:12:25,579 --> 00:12:29,499 But the salt...
- 00:12:29,666 --> 00:12:32,419 I wish I'd thought this through.
- 00:12:32,586 --> 00:12:36,631 I think I get what you mean, though. Like, the lamp is the hotel's...
- 00:12:36,798 --> 00:12:39,968 ...but the bulbs-- Oh, you already got that.
- 00:12:40,177 --> 00:12:43,096 Not my first time in a hotel, my friend.
- 00:12:43,263 --> 00:12:46,016 - Okay, uh, how about this? - No, no, no.
- 00:12:46,224 --> 00:12:50,687 - You can't take the remote control. - Yes, but the batteries.
- 00:12:55,776 --> 00:12:57,444 Thank you. Thank you very much.
- 00:12:57,652 --> 00:13:01,072 - Ooh! Let's celebrate with some maple candy. - No!
- 00:13:02,491 --> 00:13:05,869 At least tell me where you hid it.
- 00:13:09,498 --> 00:13:12,417 - Can I ask you a question? - Yeah.
- 00:13:12,709 --> 00:13:15,712 Have you ever had any...
- 00:13:15,879 --> 00:13:20,425 ...weird, romantic dreams?
- 00:13:21,676 --> 00:13:23,261 Hmm, let me think.
- 00:13:23,470 --> 00:13:28,725 Oh. When I was younger, I used to dream that I got married to Mayor McCheese.
- 00:13:28,892 --> 00:13:31,978 And on our wedding night, I ate his head.
- 00:13:33,605 --> 00:13:35,941 Okay.
- 00:13:36,107 --> 00:13:38,568 Well, this is like that...
- 00:13:38,735 --> 00:13:40,654 ...in no way.
- 00:13:40,821 --> 00:13:44,783 I had a dream last night that I wanted to kiss Joey.
- 00:13:44,950 --> 00:13:47,911 Wow! You mean like "kiss him" kiss him?
- 00:13:48,078 --> 00:13:51,414 Oh, yeah. I mean, it was pretty intense.
- 00:13:51,623 --> 00:13:53,750 - What brought that on? - I don't know.
- 00:13:53,959 --> 00:13:56,962 Maybe it had to do with the fact I saw him do a love scene.
- 00:13:57,170 --> 00:13:59,464 - A love scene? With who? - Olivia.
- 00:13:59,673 --> 00:14:02,968 Olivia? I thought she was marrying Connor?
- 00:14:03,134 --> 00:14:06,263 Oh, right. Real life more important.
- 00:14:06,471 --> 00:14:09,891 - You think my dream means anything? - I don't know.
- 00:14:10,100 --> 00:14:14,521 I mean, you saw him do a love scene. Maybe you don't have a thing for Joey.
- 00:14:14,688 --> 00:14:17,732 Maybe you have a thing for Drake.
- 00:14:17,941 --> 00:14:19,651 Huh...
- 00:14:20,110 --> 00:14:24,531 Well, it was Joey reading Drake's lines in the dream.
- 00:14:24,739 --> 00:14:28,493 Of course it was. Trust me, when it comes to psychology...
- 00:14:28,660 --> 00:14:31,913 ...I know what I'm talking about.
- 00:14:32,080 --> 00:14:36,251 - I took two psych classes in college. - You took the same class twice.
- 00:14:36,459 --> 00:14:39,004 - It was hard! - I know.
- 00:14:39,671 --> 00:14:42,007 - Hey. RACHEL & MONICA: Hi.
- 00:14:42,173 --> 00:14:47,137 Here, Monica, look what I got to wear when I play at your restaurant.
- 00:14:50,724 --> 00:14:53,727 Ah. Ah. Wait.
- 00:14:55,186 --> 00:15:00,025 Right? I think this might even class up "The Ballad of the Uncircumcised Man."
- 00:15:01,860 --> 00:15:04,487 Um, Phoebe...
- 00:15:04,654 --> 00:15:07,616 ...maybe I wasn't clear before.
- 00:15:07,782 --> 00:15:11,286 I really love listening to your music here.
- 00:15:11,453 --> 00:15:14,331 But my restaurant, it's sort of an upscale place.
- 00:15:14,539 --> 00:15:19,294 Right, yeah, okay. I'll ask the butler to fetch my diamonds out of the vault.
- 00:15:19,461 --> 00:15:22,339 Phoebe, it's not what you wear.
- 00:15:22,505 --> 00:15:25,675 It's sort of your songs.
- 00:15:25,842 --> 00:15:28,887 I just don't think you should play at the restaurant anymore.
- 00:15:29,930 --> 00:15:34,601 Oh. Okay. Fine, <i>I'll</i> just--
- 00:15:34,768 --> 00:15:37,520 I'll take the hat back.
- 00:15:39,397 --> 00:15:41,524 There.
- 00:15:46,821 --> 00:15:49,950 Hey, so you guys, the funniest thing happened at work the--
- 00:15:50,158 --> 00:15:52,243 My songs aren't good enough for your restaurant?
- 00:15:52,452 --> 00:15:55,038 Okay, we're still on that.
- 00:15:55,246 --> 00:15:58,750 - I didn't say they weren't good enough. - Then what's wrong with them?
- 00:15:58,917 --> 00:16:02,003 What, they don't go with your tiny portions of pretentious food?
- 00:16:02,212 --> 00:16:05,465 - Tiny portions? - Yeah, well, um, "Excuse me.
- 00:16:05,632 --> 00:16:10,845 I ordered the smoked salmon appetizer, but I can't see it. I can't see it."
- 00:16:12,973 --> 00:16:16,935 - Phoebe, it's not about quantity. - Well, it's not about quality.
- 00:16:17,227 --> 00:16:20,188 Oh, really? You wanna talk about quality?
- 00:16:20,438 --> 00:16:24,734 Have you ever heard of a "key"? It's what some people sing in.
- 00:16:24,943 --> 00:16:28,905 Well, at least all my songs don't taste like garlic.
- 00:16:29,114 --> 00:16:31,616 Yeah, there are other ingredients, Monica.
- 00:16:32,659 --> 00:16:34,244 So that's what we're doing.
- 00:16:34,411 --> 00:16:37,414 When I'm in a coffeehouse bopping along to one of your songs...
- 00:16:37,580 --> 00:16:41,292 -...I'm wearing earplugs. - Earplugs or cloves of garlic?
- 00:16:43,253 --> 00:16:45,422 You know what? I take back what I said before.
- 00:16:45,588 --> 00:16:49,342 Keep playing at the restaurant, because with your music driving people inside...
- 00:16:49,509 --> 00:16:51,386 ...my bar sales have gone up like crazy.
- 00:16:51,553 --> 00:16:54,556 What are people having, the garlic martini?
- 00:16:57,517 --> 00:16:59,811 Here's your bill. We hope you enjoyed your stay.
- 00:17:00,020 --> 00:17:03,815 Oh, we did. And you still have all your lamps.
- 00:17:05,817 --> 00:17:09,571 - I didn't factor in the room tax. - Dude, don't worry about it.
- 00:17:09,738 --> 00:17:14,826 I found an unattended maid's cart. We're way ahead of the game.
- 00:17:14,993 --> 00:17:17,287 - Oh, my God. - What?
- 00:17:17,454 --> 00:17:20,081 There's something new in the bowl.
- 00:17:20,248 --> 00:17:25,045 - Look, we have enough. Just walk away. - No, but I want the pine cones.
- 00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:29,674 - There's a forest right outside. - It's not the same.
- 00:17:29,883 --> 00:17:32,427 Okay, go quick.
- 00:17:34,262 --> 00:17:36,681 [CAWING]
- 00:17:39,350 --> 00:17:42,145 Thank you for a delightful stay.
- 00:17:50,653 --> 00:17:53,615 MY maple candy!
- 00:17:56,910 --> 00:18:00,330 <i>[SINGING] The food here at Javu Will kill you</i>
- 00:18:00,538 --> 00:18:04,084 <i>The food here at Javu Will kill you</i>
- 00:18:04,250 --> 00:18:09,130 It's just you. I thought someone was swinging a bag of cats against the wall.
- 00:18:09,464 --> 00:18:14,010 You'd better get back in that kitchen. The garlic's not gonna overuse itself.
- 00:18:14,177 --> 00:18:16,721 - Okay, you have to stop playing now. - Why?
- 00:18:16,888 --> 00:18:19,182 The only person my playing is bothering is you.
- 00:18:19,349 --> 00:18:24,562 - Oh, yeah? Let's settle this. Come on. - Get your garlic peelers off me.
- 00:18:25,230 --> 00:18:27,148 Excuse me? Excuse me?
- 00:18:27,315 --> 00:18:30,860 Hi, I'm Monica Geller. I'm the head chef here.
- 00:18:31,486 --> 00:18:35,031 Okay, I was actually expecting a little applause there, but whatever.
- 00:18:35,240 --> 00:18:37,992 Quick question. By a show of hands...
- 00:18:38,159 --> 00:18:42,372 ...how many of you were bothered by this woman's singing outside?
- 00:18:43,081 --> 00:18:46,835 Okay, okay. How many of you enjoyed the music outside?
- 00:18:48,461 --> 00:18:49,504 Ha!
- 00:18:49,671 --> 00:18:52,799 Let me ask you this question. How many thought the music was fine...
- 00:18:52,966 --> 00:18:56,261 ...but not in keeping with the tone of the restaurant?
- 00:18:56,427 --> 00:19:02,350 Who identified this restaurant's tone as "pretentious-comma-garlicky"?
- 00:19:02,517 --> 00:19:08,648 Okay, who thinks the food is delicious and a little pretension never hurt anyone?
- 00:19:09,399 --> 00:19:12,902 Okay, well, all right, who thinks the food is fine, the music was fine...
- 00:19:13,069 --> 00:19:16,573 ...but your evening was ruined by this incessant poll-taking?
- 00:19:20,243 --> 00:19:22,704 Excuse us.
- 00:19:25,206 --> 00:19:27,500 All right, here's a question.
- 00:19:27,667 --> 00:19:31,629 Uh, who was so worried about her restaurant being fancy...
- 00:19:31,796 --> 00:19:35,008 ...that she made a big deal about her friend playing her music...
- 00:19:35,175 --> 00:19:38,469 ...and feels really bad about it now?
- 00:19:39,512 --> 00:19:42,098 Well, who was so stupid and stubborn...
- 00:19:42,265 --> 00:19:44,684 ...that she lashed out against her friend's cooking...
- 00:19:44,851 --> 00:19:48,188 ...which she actually thinks is pretty great?
- 00:19:48,396 --> 00:19:51,316 - I'm sorry. - I'm sorry too.
- 00:19:51,608 --> 00:19:54,569 Hey, you wanna stick around and I'll whip you up some dinner?
- 00:19:54,777 --> 00:19:59,490 Yeah, as long as it's free. The food here is ridiculously overpr--
- 00:20:02,118 --> 00:20:06,998 Who hopes the hand-raising thing is still cute enough that you won't hate me?
- 00:20:09,459 --> 00:20:11,294 _H6Y- _H6Y-
- 00:20:12,670 --> 00:20:17,383 Joey, do you have peanut butter on the back of your head?
- 00:20:19,761 --> 00:20:23,014 Oh, man. I thought I got it all.
- 00:20:24,432 --> 00:20:25,934 How...?
- 00:20:26,100 --> 00:20:27,894 How?
- 00:20:28,144 --> 00:20:30,605 I was making a peanut butter smoothie, right?
- 00:20:30,772 --> 00:20:34,943 I couldn't find this little plastic thingy that goes in the top of the blender.
- 00:20:35,109 --> 00:20:39,280 And I thought, "Well, you know, how important can that be?" Right?
- 00:20:39,864 --> 00:20:41,616 Turns out, very.
- 00:20:43,409 --> 00:20:45,328 Wow, definitely just Drake.
- 00:20:45,954 --> 00:20:48,206 - What? - How's it going with Drake?
- 00:20:48,456 --> 00:20:51,668 - I don't think it's going very well. - What?
- 00:20:51,876 --> 00:20:53,711 That scene I saw was so good.
- 00:20:53,920 --> 00:20:58,549 Well, I'm feeling really insecure about the one we're shooting tomorrow.
- 00:20:58,841 --> 00:21:02,971 Is this that thing you do when you say you're bad so I'll give you a compliment?
- 00:21:03,304 --> 00:21:05,306 A little.
- 00:21:05,473 --> 00:21:11,854 No, I really am worried. I have to make it convincing that I'm in love with Olivia.
- 00:21:12,021 --> 00:21:15,024 - So? - So I've never played that.
- 00:21:15,233 --> 00:21:19,028 Oh, honey, it can't be that hard. I mean, you've been in love before.
- 00:21:19,737 --> 00:21:23,074 Uh, well, just once...
- 00:21:23,241 --> 00:21:25,535 ...with you.
- 00:21:27,036 --> 00:21:29,205 Okay. Well, this could be a little awkward.
- 00:21:29,372 --> 00:21:31,874 I'm just gonna blow past it.
- 00:21:32,041 --> 00:21:35,086 Well, look, can't you just use that method-actor thing...
- 00:21:35,295 --> 00:21:40,174 ...where you use your real-life memories to help you in your performance?
- 00:21:40,341 --> 00:21:42,719 What the hell are you talking about?
- 00:21:45,179 --> 00:21:51,060 All right, look, just, um, try to remember how you felt when you were in love...
- 00:21:51,227 --> 00:21:54,105 ...and think about that when you're playing the scene.
- 00:21:54,272 --> 00:21:55,815 Oh.
- 00:21:56,983 --> 00:22:00,278 Okay. Yeah, I think I can do that.
- 00:22:00,445 --> 00:22:03,323 Yeah. Okay, there's this party scene coming up.
- 00:22:03,489 --> 00:22:05,950 - Uh-huh. - And Olivia and her husband are there...
- 00:22:06,159 --> 00:22:11,331 ...and all Drake wants to do is grab her and kiss her, but he can't.
- 00:22:11,497 --> 00:22:16,044 That makes me think about those times I wanted to grab you and kiss you...
- 00:22:16,210 --> 00:22:19,505 ...but you didn't know, so I would just pretend everything was cool...
- 00:22:19,672 --> 00:22:21,716 ...but really it was killing me.
- 00:22:23,718 --> 00:22:27,722 Joey, you never talked about that before.
- 00:22:27,972 --> 00:22:29,557 Well...
- 00:22:29,849 --> 00:22:32,852 Hey, you know what else I could use?
- 00:22:33,019 --> 00:22:36,356 There's this scene where Drake sneaks into Olivia's bedroom...
- 00:22:36,522 --> 00:22:40,902 ...and she doesn't know he's there, which never happened with us.
- 00:22:42,278 --> 00:22:47,241 I mean, he knows he shouldn't be there, but he just wants to look at her.
- 00:22:48,659 --> 00:22:50,119 You know?
- 00:22:50,286 --> 00:22:55,291 And I remember all those mornings before you even put on your makeup...
- 00:22:55,458 --> 00:23:00,838 ...when I would think to myself, "My God, she is beautiful."
- 00:23:02,548 --> 00:23:07,595 And it hurt so much because I knew I could never tell you.
- 00:23:10,306 --> 00:23:15,311 But it was worth it just to be there looking at you.
- 00:23:20,942 --> 00:23:22,819 Thanks, dude. This is great!
- 00:23:33,955 --> 00:23:36,249 I got you something from Vermont.
- 00:23:36,457 --> 00:23:38,626 Besides tampons and salt?
- 00:23:40,211 --> 00:23:41,921 Oh, my God.
- 00:23:42,130 --> 00:23:45,716 Maple candy. That's so sweet of you.
- 00:23:46,759 --> 00:23:48,719 That's weird, it's empty.
- 00:23:49,095 --> 00:23:54,350 Hi, you guys. What's going on? You guys wanna hang out, or...?
- 00:24:00,690 --> 00:24:02,525 Do you guys hear a buzzing?
- 00:24:06,821 --> 00:24:08,823 [English - US - SDH]
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