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Эпизод с кузиной Росса и Моники
The One with Ross and Monica's Cousin
Сезон: 07Серия: 19
Описание
В гости приезжает очаровательная кузина Росса и Моники, Кэсси (Дениз Ричардс), и Чендлер, Росс и Фиби начинают испытывать к ней симпатию. Рейчел и Фиби устраивают Монике девичник в последний момент. Джои проходит прослушивание на роль, которая идеально ему подходит, за исключением того, что для неё требуется необрезанный актёр (а Джои обрезан). Узнав, что он солгал о своей «нижней части тела», Моника пытается исправить это, чтобы он всё-таки получил роль, используя различные методы, включая пластилин и мясные деликатесы. Примечание: Сюжетная линия, где Джои проходит прослушивание на роль необрезанного мужчины, изначально была написана для серии «Свадьба Барри и Минди», но история была изменена по совету цензоров телеканала, которые сочли её неуместной.
Субтитры
- 00:00:05,380 --> 00:00:08,257 - Oh, hey! How was your audition? - Hey.
- 00:00:08,842 --> 00:00:11,260 I'm sorry, do I know you?
- 00:00:12,762 --> 00:00:13,804 What are you doing?
- 00:00:13,972 --> 00:00:16,724 Practicing blowing you off. I'm gonna be a big movie star!
- 00:00:16,891 --> 00:00:18,892 Oh, you got it?
- 00:00:19,060 --> 00:00:22,646 - Not yet, but the audition went great! - What's it for?
- 00:00:22,814 --> 00:00:26,442 A big-budget period movie about three Italian brothers...
- 00:00:26,609 --> 00:00:30,320 ...who come to America at the turn of the century. It's classy.
- 00:00:30,488 --> 00:00:34,783 The director's supposed to be the next-next Martin Scorsese.
- 00:00:36,619 --> 00:00:37,911 The "next-next"?
- 00:00:38,079 --> 00:00:41,915 A guy from Chicago's supposed to be the next Martin Scorsese.
- 00:00:42,083 --> 00:00:44,209 This guy's right after him.
- 00:00:45,128 --> 00:00:46,795 [CELL PHONE RINGS]
- 00:00:47,547 --> 00:00:48,630 Hello?
- 00:00:48,798 --> 00:00:54,636 Joey, it's Estelle. I just talked to the casting people. They loved you!
- 00:00:54,804 --> 00:00:55,888 They loved me!
- 00:00:57,140 --> 00:00:59,641 They want to see you again tomorrow.
- 00:00:59,809 --> 00:01:01,935 - Oh, my God. ESTELLE [OVER PHONE]: Just one thing.
- 00:01:02,103 --> 00:01:05,814 Do you have a problem with full-frontal nudity?
- 00:01:07,692 --> 00:01:11,403 Are you kidding me? I never rent a movie without it!
- 00:01:12,280 --> 00:01:13,947 Oh.
- 00:01:14,449 --> 00:01:18,118 Uh, okay, let me call you back.
- 00:01:18,286 --> 00:01:21,997 - What's the matter? - They want me naked in the movie.
- 00:01:22,165 --> 00:01:23,457 - Wow. JOEY: I know.
- 00:01:23,625 --> 00:01:28,754 - My grandmother's gonna see this. - Grandma's gonna have to get in line.
- 00:02:10,839 --> 00:02:13,382 The wedding's so close. Are you nervous?
- 00:02:13,550 --> 00:02:16,510 Yeah, but I also can't wait till it's over.
- 00:02:16,678 --> 00:02:19,805 We have a pact not to have sex again until the wedding.
- 00:02:19,973 --> 00:02:22,683 A "no sex" pact, huh?
- 00:02:23,351 --> 00:02:26,979 I have one of those with every woman in America.
- 00:02:29,149 --> 00:02:32,317 Will you give me a hand making up the guest bedroom?
- 00:02:32,485 --> 00:02:34,945 Cousin Cassie's staying with us for a few days.
- 00:02:35,113 --> 00:02:38,490 Cassie? I haven't seen her in, like, forever.
- 00:02:38,658 --> 00:02:41,827 I wonder if she still carries a Barbie everywhere?
- 00:02:41,995 --> 00:02:44,454 - She's 25 years old. - So? I still...
- 00:02:44,622 --> 00:02:46,165 You're probably right.
- 00:02:48,001 --> 00:02:49,418 - Hi. MONICA & PHOEBE: Hey.
- 00:02:49,586 --> 00:02:51,587 Pheebs, can I talk to you over here for a second?
- 00:02:51,754 --> 00:02:53,088 PHOEBE: Yeah.
- 00:02:53,256 --> 00:02:55,340 Subtle, guys.
- 00:02:56,092 --> 00:02:57,176 What?
- 00:02:57,343 --> 00:03:01,263 I know you're planning my surprise bridal shower.
- 00:03:01,890 --> 00:03:06,393 Ha, okay, well, don't ruin it. Just play along, at least.
- 00:03:06,561 --> 00:03:08,645 - Okay. Sorry. RACHEL: Okay.
- 00:03:09,606 --> 00:03:12,191 Oh, my God. We have to throw her a shower?
- 00:03:17,697 --> 00:03:20,199 What'd you decide to do about the movie?
- 00:03:20,366 --> 00:03:22,743 I don't know.
- 00:03:23,119 --> 00:03:27,164 It's not like it's porn. This is a serious, legitimate movie.
- 00:03:27,332 --> 00:03:29,750 Nudity's really important to the story.
- 00:03:29,918 --> 00:03:32,085 That's what you say about porn.
- 00:03:33,004 --> 00:03:35,339 Maybe I shouldn't go on the callback.
- 00:03:35,506 --> 00:03:39,635 No, you should. A lot of major actors do nude scenes.
- 00:03:39,802 --> 00:03:42,304 The chance to star in a movie? Come on!
- 00:03:42,972 --> 00:03:48,227 That's true. And I'm only naked in one scene. It sounds really great.
- 00:03:48,394 --> 00:03:51,480 My character's Catholic. He falls in love with a Jewish girl.
- 00:03:51,648 --> 00:03:54,316 We run away and get caught in a big rainstorm.
- 00:03:54,484 --> 00:03:58,028 We go into a barn, undress each other and hold each other.
- 00:03:58,196 --> 00:04:01,240 It's really sweet and tender.
- 00:04:01,407 --> 00:04:02,991 Plus, everyone is gonna see your thing.
- 00:04:03,159 --> 00:04:04,368 [LAUGHS]
- 00:04:07,455 --> 00:04:09,539 When can we have this shower?
- 00:04:09,707 --> 00:04:13,001 She has so much going on, we have only two options.
- 00:04:13,169 --> 00:04:16,046 - We have Friday. - That's just two days away.
- 00:04:16,214 --> 00:04:19,383 - What is the other option? - Yesterday.
- 00:04:19,926 --> 00:04:22,844 Well, if we make it yesterday, woo-hoo, we're done.
- 00:04:23,388 --> 00:04:25,639 It's impossible. We can't do this by Friday.
- 00:04:25,807 --> 00:04:28,350 We have to find a place, invite people, get food.
- 00:04:28,518 --> 00:04:30,811 There's too much to do.
- 00:04:30,979 --> 00:04:33,438 - We cannot do it! - Calm down!
- 00:04:33,606 --> 00:04:36,858 Okay. I'm sorry, you're right. I'm sorry.
- 00:04:37,026 --> 00:04:38,527 Just calm down, woman!
- 00:04:41,197 --> 00:04:43,240 Phoebe, I already did.
- 00:04:43,408 --> 00:04:45,826 - All right, then I need to calm down. - Okay.
- 00:04:47,245 --> 00:04:49,621 I think we can do this if we just get organized.
- 00:04:49,789 --> 00:04:51,707 - Uh-huh. - We have two days to plan this party.
- 00:04:51,874 --> 00:04:54,668 - We just need to make fast decisions. - Mm-hm.
- 00:04:54,836 --> 00:04:56,211 Where will we have it?
- 00:04:56,379 --> 00:04:59,298 - Um, here. What time? - Four o'clock. Food?
- 00:04:59,507 --> 00:05:02,759 - Finger sandwiches and tea. - Ooh, great. Very Monica.
- 00:05:02,927 --> 00:05:05,262 - And chili. - Ah, you went one too far.
- 00:05:06,723 --> 00:05:08,849 - Uh, flowers or balloons? - Both.
- 00:05:09,017 --> 00:05:11,143 - We're paying for this. Okay. - Neither.
- 00:05:11,311 --> 00:05:17,024 - Um, what should we do for the theme? - "Lusts of the Flesh."
- 00:05:18,234 --> 00:05:21,570 - What? - I don't know. Cowboy theme?
- 00:05:23,614 --> 00:05:24,740 [DOOR OPENS]
- 00:05:24,907 --> 00:05:26,742 - Hey. - Hey.
- 00:05:26,909 --> 00:05:30,495 I'm glad we decided not to sleep together before the wedding.
- 00:05:30,705 --> 00:05:32,998 Oh, boy. Me too.
- 00:05:33,541 --> 00:05:35,751 You know, I was thinking, if we had a big fight...
- 00:05:35,918 --> 00:05:38,211 - Mm-hm. ...and, uh, we broke up for a few hours.
- 00:05:38,379 --> 00:05:42,090 - Yeah. - Technically, we could have sex again.
- 00:05:43,634 --> 00:05:46,136 What do you think, bossy and domineering?
- 00:05:46,304 --> 00:05:48,972 The wedding's off, sloppy and immature.
- 00:05:49,140 --> 00:05:50,474 - That's me. Come on. - Okay.
- 00:05:50,641 --> 00:05:54,144 Wait. Cassie's in the guest room. We're going to lunch.
- 00:05:54,312 --> 00:05:56,438 Get rid of her, obsessive and shrill!
- 00:05:57,440 --> 00:05:59,900 Shrill? The wedding is back on.
- 00:06:00,860 --> 00:06:01,943 [DOOR OPENS]
- 00:06:02,111 --> 00:06:05,447 I thought I heard voices. You must be Chandler.
- 00:06:06,074 --> 00:06:09,201 - Hi. Nice to meet you. - Nice to meet you too.
- 00:06:09,369 --> 00:06:11,912 - So, ready to go? - Yeah.
- 00:06:29,847 --> 00:06:32,641 - Chandler? - I'll be right with you.
- 00:06:35,019 --> 00:06:37,646 - Cassie needs to stay at your place. - Why?
- 00:06:37,814 --> 00:06:41,483 Because "Pervie Perverson" here can't stop staring at her.
- 00:06:41,901 --> 00:06:44,194 Chandler, she's our cousin!
- 00:06:44,362 --> 00:06:47,406 I wasn't staring. I was listening intently.
- 00:06:47,573 --> 00:06:51,076 It's called being a good conversationalist. Watch.
- 00:06:51,244 --> 00:06:52,869 Say something.
- 00:06:53,037 --> 00:06:56,331 You were staring about eight inches south of there.
- 00:06:57,250 --> 00:06:59,543 Fine. She can stay at my place.
- 00:06:59,710 --> 00:07:02,003 What does Cassie look like now?
- 00:07:02,171 --> 00:07:04,714 - She looks exactly like Aunt Marilyn. ROSS: Huh.
- 00:07:04,882 --> 00:07:07,843 So this Aunt Marilyn, is she coming to the wedding?
- 00:07:08,010 --> 00:07:09,928 Wafer-thin ice.
- 00:07:15,601 --> 00:07:16,643 Hey, I'm back.
- 00:07:16,811 --> 00:07:17,894 Hi, Joey.
- 00:07:18,062 --> 00:07:21,148 Uh, so, will I be reading the same scene again?
- 00:07:21,315 --> 00:07:24,151 I tried to call you. You didn't need to come today.
- 00:07:24,735 --> 00:07:26,486 Oh, great.
- 00:07:27,447 --> 00:07:29,781 I'd have been perfect for this part.
- 00:07:29,949 --> 00:07:33,493 You made a bad decision and ruined your movie. Good day!
- 00:07:33,661 --> 00:07:38,540 You didn't need to come, because the director saw your tape and loved it.
- 00:07:41,002 --> 00:07:43,128 And scene.
- 00:07:45,131 --> 00:07:47,382 Huh? Wasn't that fun?
- 00:07:47,550 --> 00:07:50,886 We did a little improv there. Yeah!
- 00:07:51,053 --> 00:07:52,762 So, you... You were saying?
- 00:07:52,930 --> 00:07:55,599 The director wants to meet you tomorrow.
- 00:07:55,766 --> 00:07:57,934 Wow. Sure. That's great.
- 00:07:58,102 --> 00:08:00,395 Your agent said you're okay with nudity.
- 00:08:00,563 --> 00:08:03,523 Yeah, sure. As long as it's handled tastefully.
- 00:08:03,691 --> 00:08:06,276 And that barn is not too cold.
- 00:08:09,363 --> 00:08:11,615 Terrific. Well, uh, there's one more thing.
- 00:08:11,782 --> 00:08:17,037 Uh... Uh, it's important to the director that everything in the movie is authentic.
- 00:08:17,955 --> 00:08:20,540 In your love scene with Sarah...
- 00:08:20,708 --> 00:08:24,878 ...she talks about how she's never seen a naked man who wasn't Jewish.
- 00:08:25,046 --> 00:08:26,087 So...
- 00:08:26,255 --> 00:08:27,589 [CHUCKLES]
- 00:08:29,008 --> 00:08:30,884 So, what?
- 00:08:31,052 --> 00:08:35,847 So, uh, well, the director is insisting that whoever play that part...
- 00:08:36,015 --> 00:08:39,893 ...be authentically, uh, anatomically...
- 00:08:40,061 --> 00:08:42,812 ...not Jewish. You know what I'm saying?
- 00:08:42,980 --> 00:08:44,397 Yes!
- 00:08:45,024 --> 00:08:46,900 No. What?
- 00:08:48,903 --> 00:08:53,365 An Italian Catholic immigrant at this time would not be...
- 00:08:53,533 --> 00:08:54,783 Bar mitzvah-ed?
- 00:08:59,997 --> 00:09:02,666 - To get this part, you can't be... - No.
- 00:09:02,833 --> 00:09:03,875 - But you are? - Yep.
- 00:09:04,043 --> 00:09:06,545 - You told them you weren't? - That's right.
- 00:09:07,547 --> 00:09:09,130 Wow. Wow.
- 00:09:09,507 --> 00:09:12,551 It's definitely all gone? There's nothing there to work with?
- 00:09:16,931 --> 00:09:20,642 - What were you thinking? - I don't know. I just want this part.
- 00:09:20,810 --> 00:09:25,063 They say no matter what you're asked during an audition, say yes.
- 00:09:25,231 --> 00:09:27,899 They want you to ride a horse, say you can.
- 00:09:28,067 --> 00:09:30,235 You figure out how to do it later.
- 00:09:30,403 --> 00:09:36,575 This is not like learning to ride a horse. This is like learning to...
- 00:09:36,742 --> 00:09:38,827 ...grow a turtleneck.
- 00:09:44,041 --> 00:09:50,088 I know, okay? Tomorrow, when I go meet the director...
- 00:09:50,256 --> 00:09:53,758 ...I have to take my clothes off so they can see what my body looks like.
- 00:09:53,926 --> 00:09:56,595 Oh, my God. What are you gonna do?
- 00:09:57,221 --> 00:10:00,807 I have to call my agent and tell her I can't do the part.
- 00:10:00,975 --> 00:10:02,225 [JOEY SIGHS]
- 00:10:02,393 --> 00:10:03,727 Unless...
- 00:10:05,563 --> 00:10:06,605 Unless what?
- 00:10:06,772 --> 00:10:11,026 This may sound crazy, but there may be something we could...
- 00:10:11,193 --> 00:10:12,402 ...fashion.
- 00:10:16,407 --> 00:10:19,576 - Like what? - Well, I'm not sure yet, but, um...
- 00:10:19,744 --> 00:10:22,120 ...off the top of my head, I'm thinking...
- 00:10:22,288 --> 00:10:26,791 ...double-sided tape and some sort of luncheon meat.
- 00:10:33,549 --> 00:10:37,469 I've got a great idea for party favors for the shower.
- 00:10:37,637 --> 00:10:41,473 We get mahogany boxes and carve everyone's names in them.
- 00:10:41,641 --> 00:10:45,226 Then inside is each person's individual birthstone.
- 00:10:47,104 --> 00:10:50,190 Okay. Okay.
- 00:10:50,983 --> 00:10:53,109 - All right, you take care of that. - Okay.
- 00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:58,823 Meanwhile, the party's tomorrow and we don't have a guest list.
- 00:10:58,991 --> 00:11:03,620 Okay. Who do we know that's coming? Me. Are you?
- 00:11:06,957 --> 00:11:08,458 - Hey. - Hey, what's up?
- 00:11:08,626 --> 00:11:12,337 I'm making something for Joey. Can I raid your fridge?
- 00:11:12,505 --> 00:11:14,339 Have at it.
- 00:11:15,299 --> 00:11:19,469 All right. Turkey? Mm, that won't work.
- 00:11:19,637 --> 00:11:22,138 Cheese? That won't work.
- 00:11:22,306 --> 00:11:26,059 Olive loaf? I hope that won't work.
- 00:11:28,270 --> 00:11:29,771 Are you making him a sandwich?
- 00:11:30,856 --> 00:11:33,441 No, it's, um, more like a wrap.
- 00:11:35,861 --> 00:11:37,862 Okay, so, um, I'm gonna go, guys.
- 00:11:38,030 --> 00:11:41,741 So you can get back to deciding on what to get me for a present!
- 00:11:41,909 --> 00:11:43,118 [GIGGLES]
- 00:11:43,285 --> 00:11:44,411 [PHOEBE AND RACHEL CHUCKLE]
- 00:11:44,578 --> 00:11:45,620 [DOOR CLOSES]
- 00:11:45,788 --> 00:11:48,289 We have to get her a present?
- 00:11:49,041 --> 00:11:52,210 Okay, but look. Look at what I got.
- 00:11:52,378 --> 00:11:54,504 It's her address book. We have a guest list.
- 00:11:54,672 --> 00:11:56,339 Ah.
- 00:11:57,425 --> 00:12:00,760 You're amazing. Did you pull that out of her purse?
- 00:12:00,928 --> 00:12:03,430 Uh-huh. And a little seed money for the party.
- 00:12:03,597 --> 00:12:05,265 Oh, nice.
- 00:12:09,395 --> 00:12:11,438 [KNOCKING ON DOOR]
- 00:12:12,273 --> 00:12:13,356 [CASSIE SIGHS]
- 00:12:13,524 --> 00:12:15,316 Cassie?
- 00:12:15,526 --> 00:12:18,027 - Hey, Ross. - [STAMMERS] Hi. Ha, ha.
- 00:12:18,195 --> 00:12:20,780 It's been so long!
- 00:12:21,615 --> 00:12:23,241 Last time I saw you...
- 00:12:23,409 --> 00:12:27,078 ...you were setting up your tent in line for Return of the Jedi.
- 00:12:27,246 --> 00:12:28,580 [STAMMERS] Oh, uh, that's right.
- 00:12:28,748 --> 00:12:33,293 So you did see me that day. Because it seemed like you didn't.
- 00:12:33,461 --> 00:12:34,502 [CHUCKLES AWKWARDLY]
- 00:12:34,670 --> 00:12:38,214 - Yeah, sorry about that. - It's okay. Come on in.
- 00:12:38,382 --> 00:12:42,427 Thanks for letting me stay here. Monica's place was nice.
- 00:12:42,595 --> 00:12:46,055 But her fiancé sure stares a lot.
- 00:12:46,223 --> 00:12:47,807 Oh.
- 00:13:07,578 --> 00:13:11,456 Oh, my God! You do a great Chandler!
- 00:13:12,958 --> 00:13:14,000 Uh-huh.
- 00:13:14,168 --> 00:13:15,335 [CASSIE GIGGLES]
- 00:13:15,503 --> 00:13:18,129 Yeah, I have a knack for impressions.
- 00:13:18,297 --> 00:13:21,424 Well, maybe after we get re-acquainted, uh, you could do me.
- 00:13:21,592 --> 00:13:23,551 Yeah. No!
- 00:13:32,645 --> 00:13:36,105 Cassie, how you...? How you doing on that...
- 00:13:36,273 --> 00:13:37,982 ...hot dog?
- 00:13:40,319 --> 00:13:43,530 - I'm all done. - Thank God.
- 00:13:45,741 --> 00:13:49,619 The last time we hung out was when our parents rented that beach house.
- 00:13:49,787 --> 00:13:51,996 Oh, right, right. Ooh, remember the time...
- 00:13:52,164 --> 00:13:55,667 ...l, uh, pinned you down and tickled you until you cried?
- 00:13:55,835 --> 00:13:57,293 [BOTH CHUCKLING]
- 00:13:57,461 --> 00:14:00,421 We're probably too old to do that now.
- 00:14:02,800 --> 00:14:07,637 I'll always remember that summer. It's when I got all these freckles.
- 00:14:07,805 --> 00:14:09,347 Uh-huh, Uh-huh.
- 00:14:10,140 --> 00:14:12,475 And... And I'll always remember that summer...
- 00:14:12,643 --> 00:14:17,480 ...because that's when I realized that we are related.
- 00:14:17,731 --> 00:14:19,649 It took you that long to figure it out, huh?
- 00:14:19,859 --> 00:14:21,192 Um, I'm a little slow.
- 00:14:21,360 --> 00:14:22,861 [BOTH CHUCKLE]
- 00:14:23,863 --> 00:14:26,614 Just as our children would be.
- 00:14:33,622 --> 00:14:34,789 - Hi. WOMAN 1: Hi.
- 00:14:34,957 --> 00:14:37,500 How are you? Good. Hi. Thanks for coming.
- 00:14:37,668 --> 00:14:40,587 WOMAN 2: Oh, thank you. - Thank you. So nice to see you.
- 00:14:40,754 --> 00:14:43,673 WOMAN 3: No, thanks. - Okay. Hey, Rach?
- 00:14:43,841 --> 00:14:46,718 - Yeah? - Who the hell are all these people?
- 00:14:47,219 --> 00:14:50,013 I don't know. I called everybody in her book.
- 00:14:50,180 --> 00:14:53,725 These are the ones that could show up on 24 hours' notice.
- 00:14:53,893 --> 00:14:57,520 There's a word for people like that: Losers.
- 00:14:59,023 --> 00:15:02,442 Hi, I'm Rachel. This is Phoebe. I'm the maid of honor.
- 00:15:02,610 --> 00:15:03,735 How do you know Monica?
- 00:15:03,903 --> 00:15:06,487 - I was her accountant four years ago. - Oh...
- 00:15:06,655 --> 00:15:10,867 I'm interested to find out who's been doing her taxes the last four years.
- 00:15:12,703 --> 00:15:14,370 That's great.
- 00:15:15,706 --> 00:15:19,500 - When is Monica supposed to get here? RACHEL & PHOEBE: I don't know.
- 00:15:20,920 --> 00:15:22,170 Excuse us.
- 00:15:24,340 --> 00:15:27,175 - You didn't tell her? - You were supposed to.
- 00:15:27,343 --> 00:15:31,220 You were supposed to tell her to come! I was bringing the cake!
- 00:15:31,388 --> 00:15:35,516 - Fine, I'll go call her. - And please tell her to bring a cake!
- 00:15:40,564 --> 00:15:41,689 [DOOR OPENS]
- 00:15:41,857 --> 00:15:46,694 We have a lot of options. A number of prototypes for you to try on.
- 00:15:47,529 --> 00:15:48,905 Wow, those look great.
- 00:15:49,073 --> 00:15:53,910 Okay, this one's a mushroom cap. Uh, this one is made of bologna.
- 00:15:54,078 --> 00:15:56,871 - And... And the toothpicks? - Just until the glue dries.
- 00:15:57,039 --> 00:15:58,414 Thank God.
- 00:15:58,582 --> 00:15:59,791 [BOTH CHUCKLE]
- 00:15:59,959 --> 00:16:03,294 These are more realistic, but perishable.
- 00:16:03,462 --> 00:16:06,798 Over here, we have pink suede, which is nice.
- 00:16:06,966 --> 00:16:09,509 But if it gets wet, it'll shrink.
- 00:16:09,677 --> 00:16:12,428 Maybe we'll just take that one away.
- 00:16:13,305 --> 00:16:18,142 I also did a little something in fur, but, uh, that's really just for me.
- 00:16:20,896 --> 00:16:25,358 Why don't you try these on? We'll get a better idea of what works.
- 00:16:25,526 --> 00:16:29,070 Thanks, you are such a good friend. And this is so weird.
- 00:16:35,953 --> 00:16:36,995 JOEY: Ow.
- 00:16:37,162 --> 00:16:39,414 - Toothpick? JOEY: Yeah.
- 00:16:40,666 --> 00:16:43,126 - What are you trying now? JOEY: The Fruit Roll-up.
- 00:16:43,293 --> 00:16:45,378 - And? JOEY: Delicious.
- 00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:47,922 Joey.
- 00:16:48,090 --> 00:16:51,426 JOEY: Wait a minute. Wait a minute. We have a winner!
- 00:16:51,593 --> 00:16:52,927 What? Which one?
- 00:16:54,221 --> 00:16:56,973 The Silly Putty. Not so silly anymore!
- 00:16:57,141 --> 00:16:58,933 [JOEY LAUGHS]
- 00:17:05,107 --> 00:17:07,233 [WEAPONS FIRING ON TV]
- 00:17:07,401 --> 00:17:12,739 ROSS: She's your cousin. She's your cousin.
- 00:17:12,906 --> 00:17:18,411 If she knew what was going on in your head, she'd think you were sick.
- 00:17:24,376 --> 00:17:28,421 Or would she? Let's back up for a second.
- 00:17:28,589 --> 00:17:33,509 She was the one who suggested opening a bottle of wine.
- 00:17:33,677 --> 00:17:36,721 She was the one who turned down the lights.
- 00:17:36,889 --> 00:17:40,558 She was the one that wanted to rent Logan's Run...
- 00:17:40,726 --> 00:17:43,728 ...the sexiest movie ever.
- 00:17:47,191 --> 00:17:49,192 I know that look.
- 00:17:49,359 --> 00:17:53,738 Forget it. I want it. She wants it.
- 00:17:53,906 --> 00:17:55,948 I'm going in.
- 00:18:03,373 --> 00:18:04,707 [CASSIE YELPS]
- 00:18:05,334 --> 00:18:06,959 What the hell are you doing?
- 00:18:08,796 --> 00:18:10,880 ROSS: Say something clever.
- 00:18:12,925 --> 00:18:15,134 Okay, doesn't have to be clever.
- 00:18:15,302 --> 00:18:19,222 Just has to be words. Say some words.
- 00:18:20,015 --> 00:18:23,184 Any words will do.
- 00:18:24,686 --> 00:18:27,396 Oh, my God, this is the longest...
- 00:18:27,564 --> 00:18:32,527 ...that anyone has not talked ever!
- 00:18:33,946 --> 00:18:36,572 There is nothing you could say to make this worse...
- 00:18:36,740 --> 00:18:40,451 ...so just say something!
- 00:18:42,204 --> 00:18:46,040 [STAMMERS] I haven't had sex in a very long time.
- 00:18:49,586 --> 00:18:52,380 ROSS: Yeah, you really shouldn't have said anything.
- 00:18:55,175 --> 00:18:57,343 Phoebe? Rachel? It's Monica.
- 00:18:57,511 --> 00:19:01,806 I wonder what you could possibly need me for on such short notice?
- 00:19:05,060 --> 00:19:06,310 Oh.
- 00:19:06,478 --> 00:19:10,273 - Oh, Monica. We are so sorry. - For what?
- 00:19:10,440 --> 00:19:14,318 First, for forgetting to throw you a bridal shower.
- 00:19:14,486 --> 00:19:16,946 Then, forgetting to invite you to it.
- 00:19:19,366 --> 00:19:20,867 You already had it?
- 00:19:21,034 --> 00:19:24,370 We called everyone in your phone book. A bunch of people came.
- 00:19:24,538 --> 00:19:27,915 It took us so long to get you here that they had to leave.
- 00:19:28,750 --> 00:19:33,087 We wanted to throw you a big surprise and a great shower.
- 00:19:33,255 --> 00:19:35,173 Now you don't have either.
- 00:19:35,340 --> 00:19:36,799 - We ruined everything. - Ugh.
- 00:19:36,967 --> 00:19:41,804 No, wait a minute, that's not true. What you did was really sweet.
- 00:19:41,972 --> 00:19:45,474 - It kind of works out for the best, heh. - What do you mean?
- 00:19:45,642 --> 00:19:50,229 Now I get to spend my shower with the only people I really love.
- 00:19:50,397 --> 00:19:55,234 I get all those presents without talking to people I don't even like!
- 00:20:01,116 --> 00:20:03,826 - Surprise. - Surprise, Monica.
- 00:20:09,583 --> 00:20:12,835 What's cool is, the character is from Naples, right?
- 00:20:13,003 --> 00:20:15,838 DIRECTOR: Yeah. - My whole family's from Naples.
- 00:20:16,006 --> 00:20:21,260 That's great. Okay. I've heard everything I need to hear...
- 00:20:21,428 --> 00:20:23,930 We just need to, uh...
- 00:20:24,598 --> 00:20:26,015 Leslie?
- 00:20:26,183 --> 00:20:30,269 - Uh, Joey, this is the awkward part. - Oh, hey, right. Not a problem.
- 00:20:30,437 --> 00:20:33,189 I totally understand you need to...
- 00:20:33,357 --> 00:20:36,984 ...make sure I don't have any horrible scars or tattoos.
- 00:20:37,152 --> 00:20:38,527 Don't you worry.
- 00:20:39,196 --> 00:20:41,656 I have nothing to hide.
- 00:20:42,950 --> 00:20:45,910 So, there you go. That's me.
- 00:20:46,078 --> 00:20:48,704 One hundred-percent natural.
- 00:20:48,872 --> 00:20:50,206 [THUD]
- 00:21:04,137 --> 00:21:07,640 I tell you, that has never happened before.
- 00:21:14,147 --> 00:21:16,482 Cassie, are you finding everything okay?
- 00:21:16,650 --> 00:21:19,443 CASSIE: Yeah. Thank you so much for letting me stay here.
- 00:21:19,611 --> 00:21:21,821 Oh, it's no problem. I've...
- 00:21:40,007 --> 00:21:41,048 What?
- 00:21:41,633 --> 00:21:44,385 PHOEBE: Say something. Say anything.
- 00:21:44,678 --> 00:21:47,430 Ask her out! She's not your cousin!
- 00:21:52,978 --> 00:21:54,979 [English - US - SDH]
Скриншоты
