Эпизод с наградой Джоуи
Описание
Джои оказывается плохим проигравшим после номинации на премию в категории «Сериал». Принимая награду в другой категории от имени коллеги по съемочной площадке, он отказывается её отдавать. Однако позже он всё же оставляет награду себе, когда актриса, получившая её, считает её незначительной. Тем временем, студент из класса Росса пытается получить более высокую оценку за тест, утверждая, что любит Росса. Другой студент раскрывает, что этот парень на самом деле гетеросексуал и использовал тот же приём с другими профессорами. Росс ставит студенту неудовлетворительную оценку, но в итоге даёт ему «С» после того, как некоторые из его коллег подслушивают разговор, который звучит так, будто Росс и студент встречались. Увидев, как Фиби быстро заводит отношения с Джейком, Моника паникует, понимая, что больше никогда не сможет испытать волнение от новых отношений, теперь, когда она выходит замуж за Чендлера. Когда Моника рассказывает Чендлеру о своих страхах, он признается, что испытывал сильную тревогу, когда они только начали встречаться, но теперь больше рад возможности провести остаток жизни вместе, что успокаивает Монику.
Субтитры
- 00:00:03,461 --> 00:00:05,504 Hey, hey! Guys, you won't believe this!
- 00:00:05,672 --> 00:00:08,507 - I just got off the phone with my agent... - Oh, my God!
- 00:00:10,760 --> 00:00:12,970 - I'm sorry. Too soon. You go. JOEY: Okay.
- 00:00:13,555 --> 00:00:16,015 I got nominated for my part on Days of Our Lives!
- 00:00:16,182 --> 00:00:19,143 PHOEBE: Oh, Joey, good for you! MONICA: Congratulations!
- 00:00:20,020 --> 00:00:22,896 - I can't believe you're nominated for an Emmy! - No, no.
- 00:00:23,064 --> 00:00:26,775 - Soap Opera Digest Award? - Nope, I'm up for a "Soapie."
- 00:00:28,820 --> 00:00:31,155 Honey, is that something you're making up?
- 00:00:31,614 --> 00:00:36,285 No, no, no, it's real! And it has been since 1998.
- 00:00:37,662 --> 00:00:39,538 Hey, Rach, Rach. I'm up for a Soapie!
- 00:00:39,706 --> 00:00:40,748 [GASPS]
- 00:00:40,915 --> 00:00:41,957 Oh, my God!
- 00:00:42,125 --> 00:00:46,754 Oh, my God! That is the third most prestigious soap opera award there is!
- 00:00:46,963 --> 00:00:50,758 Thank you! Well, I guess now we know who I'm taking to the awards.
- 00:00:51,009 --> 00:00:54,219 Oh, stop that! Don't kid about that! Will all the stars be there?
- 00:00:54,387 --> 00:00:56,889 Many are scheduled to appear.
- 00:00:57,557 --> 00:00:58,599 Oh, my God.
- 00:00:58,767 --> 00:01:02,519 - Oh, my God. I can't go. I'll be too nervous! - Okay, I'll go.
- 00:01:02,687 --> 00:01:05,564 No! You are getting married. This is all I have.
- 00:01:46,731 --> 00:01:52,027 And Ernest Muhlbrat first hypothesized that the velociraptor, when threatened...
- 00:01:52,195 --> 00:01:56,156 ...would expand its collar and emit a high-pitched noise...
- 00:01:56,324 --> 00:01:58,117 ...to frighten off its predator.
- 00:01:58,576 --> 00:01:59,618 Yes, Mr. Lewis?
- 00:02:00,495 --> 00:02:02,121 What kind of noise?
- 00:02:02,664 --> 00:02:06,917 Just a high-pitched, intimidating noise.
- 00:02:07,460 --> 00:02:09,378 But like how?
- 00:02:09,754 --> 00:02:12,798 Well, we... We don't know for sure.
- 00:02:13,466 --> 00:02:17,886 But in my head, it sounded something like this, uh:
- 00:02:18,054 --> 00:02:20,139 [SHRIEKING]
- 00:02:30,942 --> 00:02:34,236 Of course, this is just conjecture.
- 00:02:36,239 --> 00:02:38,740 Ahem, okay. That's, uh... That's all for today.
- 00:02:40,285 --> 00:02:43,245 Mr. Morse, can I see you for a moment?
- 00:02:46,291 --> 00:02:47,457 Yes, sir?
- 00:02:47,625 --> 00:02:51,795 Mr. Morse, I need to talk to you about your midterm exam.
- 00:02:52,213 --> 00:02:55,966 - I'm afraid I had to fail you. - Why?
- 00:02:56,843 --> 00:02:59,178 Well, you need 60 percent to pass.
- 00:02:59,345 --> 00:03:01,638 - What'd I get? - Seven.
- 00:03:02,724 --> 00:03:05,184 That's not so good.
- 00:03:05,768 --> 00:03:08,854 No, no, it's not. What happened there, Ned?
- 00:03:09,397 --> 00:03:14,735 Well, maybe you can cut me some slack. I'm sort of in love.
- 00:03:15,069 --> 00:03:18,238 I'm sorry, but that's really not my problem.
- 00:03:18,656 --> 00:03:20,073 I'm in love with you.
- 00:03:22,452 --> 00:03:25,537 Well, that brings me in the loop a little.
- 00:03:26,080 --> 00:03:30,667 See, that's why I did so bad on this test. I'm having a hard time concentrating.
- 00:03:30,835 --> 00:03:33,587 When you're up there and you're teaching...
- 00:03:33,755 --> 00:03:36,632 ...and your face gets all serious...
- 00:03:36,799 --> 00:03:41,762 ...you look so good. When you wear that tight little turtleneck sweater...
- 00:03:41,930 --> 00:03:44,681 Okay. Ned, um...
- 00:03:44,849 --> 00:03:48,936 I, uh... Ha, ha. I'm your teacher. I'm sorry.
- 00:03:49,103 --> 00:03:50,854 You're... You're a student.
- 00:03:51,064 --> 00:03:53,273 And I... And I like women, ha, ha.
- 00:03:53,441 --> 00:03:56,777 In spite of what may be written on the backs of some of these chairs.
- 00:04:01,658 --> 00:04:02,699 Oh, my God.
- 00:04:02,867 --> 00:04:05,327 That guy at the counter is totally checking you out.
- 00:04:05,495 --> 00:04:07,496 Really?
- 00:04:07,664 --> 00:04:11,291 - Oh, my God, he's really cute. - Heh. Go for it.
- 00:04:12,210 --> 00:04:13,961 Phoebe, I'm engaged.
- 00:04:14,128 --> 00:04:16,797 I'm just saying, get his number, just in case.
- 00:04:18,258 --> 00:04:22,469 But if Chandler is in an accident and can't perform sexually, you know...
- 00:04:22,720 --> 00:04:27,724 ...then he would want you to take a lover to satisfy the needs he can no longer fulfill.
- 00:04:30,561 --> 00:04:31,853 - Hi. I... - Oh.
- 00:04:32,021 --> 00:04:33,063 [CHUCKLES]
- 00:04:33,231 --> 00:04:34,856 Can I just tell you something? Um...
- 00:04:35,024 --> 00:04:38,819 I'm very flattered, but, uh, I'm engaged. Ha, ha.
- 00:04:39,237 --> 00:04:42,197 Wow, uh... This is kind of embarrassing.
- 00:04:42,365 --> 00:04:45,075 I was actually coming over to talk to your friend.
- 00:04:47,745 --> 00:04:49,705 Well, you should be embarrassed.
- 00:04:53,251 --> 00:04:58,005 - I thought you knew I was looking at you. - I did, but that was really fun.
- 00:05:00,008 --> 00:05:02,384 JOEY [IN DEEP VOICE]: "The winner is Joey Tribbiani!"
- 00:05:02,552 --> 00:05:04,177 [GASPS]
- 00:05:07,473 --> 00:05:09,683 [IN NORMAL VOICE] "Oh, wow.
- 00:05:09,851 --> 00:05:12,561 I honestly never expected this. I, uh...
- 00:05:12,729 --> 00:05:14,604 I didn't prepare a speech.
- 00:05:14,772 --> 00:05:19,151 But I'd like to thank my parents, who've always been there for me.
- 00:05:19,319 --> 00:05:24,448 Also like to thank my friends, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, Rachel..."
- 00:05:24,615 --> 00:05:26,658 - I'm fourth? - Jeez!
- 00:05:28,494 --> 00:05:31,204 Look at you with your little maple syrup award!
- 00:05:31,372 --> 00:05:33,290 Maybe you don't tell anyone about this.
- 00:05:33,458 --> 00:05:34,666 What? No.
- 00:05:34,834 --> 00:05:37,836 It's not a big deal. I do that too, with my shampoo bottle.
- 00:05:38,004 --> 00:05:39,046 - Really? - Yeah.
- 00:05:39,213 --> 00:05:42,174 - What award are you practicing for? - Grammy.
- 00:05:43,801 --> 00:05:46,553 - Best New Artist. - Ooh.
- 00:05:46,929 --> 00:05:50,766 Oh, hey, listen. The Soapies people called today. I also get to present an award.
- 00:05:50,933 --> 00:05:52,392 - Aw, that's great. - Yeah.
- 00:05:52,560 --> 00:05:54,853 So you'll get on stage even if you don't win.
- 00:05:58,441 --> 00:06:01,193 - You... You don't think I'm gonna win? - Of course I do.
- 00:06:01,402 --> 00:06:02,486 Oh.
- 00:06:02,653 --> 00:06:06,531 But, you know, Favorite Returning Character is a tough category, Joey.
- 00:06:06,699 --> 00:06:10,369 I mean, you're up against the guy who survived his own cremation.
- 00:06:10,703 --> 00:06:14,831 Yeah. No, I know I might not win. But it's just...
- 00:06:14,999 --> 00:06:18,001 I've never even been nominated before. I want it so much.
- 00:06:18,169 --> 00:06:19,711 Well, and you'll probably get it.
- 00:06:19,962 --> 00:06:23,715 But you should probably start practicing your "gracious-loser" face.
- 00:06:23,883 --> 00:06:27,177 Like, when the cameras are on you and you wanna look disappointed...
- 00:06:27,345 --> 00:06:30,305 ...but also that your colleague deserved to win. Sort of like:
- 00:06:30,473 --> 00:06:32,474 [GASPS]
- 00:06:36,062 --> 00:06:37,145 - Hey. - You know?
- 00:06:37,313 --> 00:06:41,942 - You practice losing at the Grammys too? - Oh, no, at the Grammys, I always win.
- 00:06:42,110 --> 00:06:43,693 Ah.
- 00:06:48,491 --> 00:06:51,034 - Oh, hey. - Hey. How'd your date go with Jake?
- 00:06:51,202 --> 00:06:53,870 Great. We couldn't keep our eyes off each other all night.
- 00:06:54,038 --> 00:06:59,292 Then every once in a while, he'd lean over and stroke my hair, and then touch my neck.
- 00:06:59,460 --> 00:07:01,503 Okay, stop it. You're getting me all tingly.
- 00:07:01,671 --> 00:07:02,712 [PHOEBE LAUGHS]
- 00:07:03,131 --> 00:07:06,216 All I could think of was, "Is he gonna kiss me? Is he?"
- 00:07:06,384 --> 00:07:09,136 - And did he? - I'm a lady, Monica. I don't kiss and tell.
- 00:07:09,303 --> 00:07:11,638 But this hickey speaks for itself.
- 00:07:11,806 --> 00:07:13,849 Okay, okay, I got it. I got it.
- 00:07:14,267 --> 00:07:17,853 I just like him so much that I just feel like I've had 10 drinks today.
- 00:07:18,020 --> 00:07:19,938 And I've only had six.
- 00:07:21,399 --> 00:07:26,570 Oh. You know, I haven't had that feeling since I first starting going out with Chandler.
- 00:07:26,863 --> 00:07:31,283 - Wow, I'm never gonna have that feeling again. - You sound like a guy.
- 00:07:31,451 --> 00:07:35,495 Heh. No, a guy would say, "I'm never gonna get to sleep with anyone else." Heh.
- 00:07:35,663 --> 00:07:38,165 Oh, my God. I'm never gonna sleep with anyone else!
- 00:07:39,667 --> 00:07:43,753 I've been so busy planning the wedding, I forgot about all the things I'd be giving up.
- 00:07:43,921 --> 00:07:47,924 I mean, I'm never gonna have a first kiss again.
- 00:07:48,217 --> 00:07:50,302 You'll have a last kiss.
- 00:07:55,683 --> 00:07:59,102 Can I ask you something? You ever had a guy have a crush on you?
- 00:07:59,270 --> 00:08:01,313 Is that why you wanted to tie my tie?
- 00:08:03,316 --> 00:08:06,818 There's this kid in my class who said he's in love with me.
- 00:08:06,986 --> 00:08:08,069 - Whoa! ROSS: Yeah.
- 00:08:08,237 --> 00:08:10,780 - Whoa, what? - Ross has a boyfriend.
- 00:08:11,657 --> 00:08:13,700 I do... I do not have a boyfriend.
- 00:08:13,868 --> 00:08:17,913 There's a guy in one of my classes who has a crush on me.
- 00:08:18,080 --> 00:08:19,706 - Really? - Yeah. I don't know.
- 00:08:19,874 --> 00:08:22,584 I mean, last year, Elizabeth, now this kid...
- 00:08:22,752 --> 00:08:26,588 What... What... What is it? Am I giving out some kind of...
- 00:08:26,756 --> 00:08:29,341 ...a sexy-professor vibe?
- 00:08:32,261 --> 00:08:33,970 Not right now.
- 00:08:34,430 --> 00:08:39,601 The point is, my natural charisma has made him fail his midterm.
- 00:08:39,769 --> 00:08:41,853 Aw, see now I feel bad for the kid.
- 00:08:42,021 --> 00:08:45,315 I had a crush on a teacher once, and it was so hard, you know.
- 00:08:45,483 --> 00:08:49,986 I couldn't concentrate and I blushed every time he looked at me.
- 00:08:50,154 --> 00:08:53,240 Come on, you remember what it's like to be 19 and in love.
- 00:08:55,034 --> 00:08:58,453 - Yeah, guess I can cut him some slack. RACHEL: Yeah.
- 00:08:58,621 --> 00:09:01,665 - How'd you get over that teacher? - I didn't.
- 00:09:01,832 --> 00:09:04,000 I got under him.
- 00:09:05,461 --> 00:09:06,711 Problem solved.
- 00:09:10,424 --> 00:09:12,801 - Bye, Phoebe. - Okay, bye.
- 00:09:18,182 --> 00:09:22,060 - All right. Bye. - Bye.
- 00:09:26,190 --> 00:09:27,399 [SIGHS]
- 00:09:27,567 --> 00:09:31,361 We said goodbye at the door so as not to flaunt our new love.
- 00:09:31,821 --> 00:09:34,447 Phoebe, it's okay. You don't have to tiptoe around me.
- 00:09:34,615 --> 00:09:37,951 I've been thinking about it, and um... You know what?
- 00:09:38,119 --> 00:09:40,787 I'm okay about not having that new-relationship feeling.
- 00:09:41,247 --> 00:09:44,749 - I miss you already! - I miss you too!
- 00:09:48,296 --> 00:09:52,591 See, that's what I mean. That's great, but I wouldn't trade in what I have for that.
- 00:09:52,758 --> 00:09:55,719 I mean, I'm gonna be with Chandler for the rest of my life.
- 00:09:55,886 --> 00:09:57,846 - That's what makes me happy. - Mm-hm.
- 00:09:58,014 --> 00:10:02,726 Hey, sweetie, come here, sit down. We were talking about how our relationship is...
- 00:10:02,893 --> 00:10:05,478 ...deep and meaningful. It really is, don't you think?
- 00:10:05,646 --> 00:10:06,980 Oh, totally.
- 00:10:08,232 --> 00:10:09,274 Pull my finger.
- 00:10:15,239 --> 00:10:18,450 ANNOUNCER: Presenting the award for Favorite Returning Male...
- 00:10:18,618 --> 00:10:20,493 This is it. This is my category!
- 00:10:20,745 --> 00:10:22,245 - Got your speech? - Got my speech.
- 00:10:22,413 --> 00:10:24,039 - Got your gracious-loser face? - Yep.
- 00:10:26,876 --> 00:10:29,252 Now, Joey, remember, if you win, you have to hug me.
- 00:10:29,420 --> 00:10:32,047 Okay. Can I squeeze your ass?
- 00:10:33,549 --> 00:10:35,133 - On TV? - Yeah.
- 00:10:35,301 --> 00:10:37,302 - Yeah. - Okay.
- 00:10:37,678 --> 00:10:41,014 In the category of Favorite Returning Male Character, the nominees are:
- 00:10:41,223 --> 00:10:43,141 John Wheeler from General Hospital.
- 00:10:43,309 --> 00:10:45,602 [CROWD APPLAUDING]
- 00:10:45,770 --> 00:10:49,481 Gavin Graham from The Young and the Restless.
- 00:10:49,774 --> 00:10:53,276 Duncan Harrington from Passions.
- 00:10:53,444 --> 00:10:57,405 And Joey Tribbiani from Days of Our Lives.
- 00:10:58,407 --> 00:11:01,326 And the Soapie goes to:
- 00:11:02,745 --> 00:11:04,913 Gavin Graham from The Young and the Restless.
- 00:11:05,081 --> 00:11:07,248 [INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE]
- 00:11:17,968 --> 00:11:20,553 ANNOUNCER: Presenting the Favorite Supporting Actress award:
- 00:11:20,721 --> 00:11:23,223 Joey Tribbiani from Days of Our Lives.
- 00:11:23,391 --> 00:11:25,141 [INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE]
- 00:11:30,398 --> 00:11:34,526 Any one of the brilliant actresses nominated for this award tonight...
- 00:11:34,777 --> 00:11:38,321 ...deserves to take it home. Unfortunately, only one can.
- 00:11:38,489 --> 00:11:40,532 [SCOFFS]
- 00:11:41,617 --> 00:11:44,077 The nominees for Favorite Supporting Actress are:
- 00:11:44,245 --> 00:11:46,913 From Passions, Erin Goff.
- 00:11:51,210 --> 00:11:53,378 From One Life to Live, Mary Lauren Bishop.
- 00:11:53,546 --> 00:11:55,797 From All My Children, Sarah Renee.
- 00:11:55,965 --> 00:11:58,967 And from Days of Our Lives, Jessica Ashley.
- 00:11:59,135 --> 00:12:01,428 And the winner is:
- 00:12:02,012 --> 00:12:04,264 Jessica Ashley from Days of Our Lives.
- 00:12:05,975 --> 00:12:08,852 Uh, unfortunately, Jessica couldn't be with us tonight...
- 00:12:09,019 --> 00:12:12,814 ...so I'll be accepting this award on her behalf.
- 00:12:16,402 --> 00:12:19,362 And I'm sure that Jessica...
- 00:12:19,530 --> 00:12:21,614 ...would like to thank my parents...
- 00:12:21,782 --> 00:12:23,867 ...who always believed in me.
- 00:12:24,034 --> 00:12:26,369 And she'd also like to thank my friends:
- 00:12:26,537 --> 00:12:30,915 Chandler, Monica, Ross, Phoebe and Rachel...
- 00:12:31,083 --> 00:12:33,251 ...who's sitting right there.
- 00:12:34,336 --> 00:12:36,337 [UPBEAT ORCHESTRAL MUSIC PLAYING]
- 00:12:44,680 --> 00:12:47,640 Joey, why did we have to rush out of there so fast?
- 00:12:47,892 --> 00:12:49,851 We had to get out of there because...
- 00:12:50,019 --> 00:12:52,187 Look what I won! Ha-ha-ha.
- 00:12:53,814 --> 00:12:57,233 Oh, my God. You stole her award.
- 00:12:57,401 --> 00:13:01,029 No, no, no. I'm accepting it on her behalf.
- 00:13:01,197 --> 00:13:02,238 [RACHEL SCOFFS]
- 00:13:02,406 --> 00:13:04,616 I don't think you know what "behalf" means.
- 00:13:04,867 --> 00:13:08,953 Sure I do. It's a verb. As in "I be half-in' it"!
- 00:13:10,414 --> 00:13:12,081 Joey...
- 00:13:13,083 --> 00:13:17,587 - You have got to take this back. - Why? I should've won one. I really wanted it.
- 00:13:17,755 --> 00:13:22,258 She didn't even care enough to come to the thing. It could also be a Grammy.
- 00:13:26,096 --> 00:13:27,138 No, Joey.
- 00:13:27,306 --> 00:13:31,142 Come on, Rach. No one saw me take it. There was a whole table full of them.
- 00:13:31,310 --> 00:13:33,853 Do you really want an award that you didn't win?
- 00:13:34,021 --> 00:13:37,816 No, I want an award I did win. But nobody's given me any of those!
- 00:13:39,360 --> 00:13:43,238 Plus, look, hey, Rach. If I put it up, when people come over, they'll see it...
- 00:13:43,447 --> 00:13:44,989 ...and they'll think I won it.
- 00:13:45,157 --> 00:13:48,034 Joey, it says "Best Supporting Actress."
- 00:13:48,744 --> 00:13:50,703 I can scratch that right off.
- 00:13:51,872 --> 00:13:54,290 Joey, no, this is wrong. You have to take it back.
- 00:13:54,458 --> 00:13:59,462 Okay? You don't wanna win an award this way. You're very talented.
- 00:13:59,630 --> 00:14:04,509 And someday you're gonna win one of these for real and that one is gonna mean something.
- 00:14:07,012 --> 00:14:09,639 - Oh, all right. - All right? Thank you.
- 00:14:09,807 --> 00:14:10,890 [JOEY SIGHS]
- 00:14:11,058 --> 00:14:14,185 - I'll take it back tomorrow. - Thank you.
- 00:14:25,281 --> 00:14:27,991 - If I can't have it, you can't have it! - Aah!
- 00:14:34,456 --> 00:14:38,501 - Professor Geller? - Yes, Mr. Lewis? How can I help you?
- 00:14:38,669 --> 00:14:41,754 I know I didn't do well on my midterms and stuff...
- 00:14:41,922 --> 00:14:45,466 ...but I was kind of hoping you could change my grade.
- 00:14:45,634 --> 00:14:48,136 And why exactly would I do that?
- 00:14:48,888 --> 00:14:50,513 Because I'm in love with you.
- 00:14:53,309 --> 00:14:55,059 What?
- 00:14:55,436 --> 00:14:59,188 Yeah. I'm all in love with you and stuff.
- 00:15:01,400 --> 00:15:04,861 - So could you change my grade? - No!
- 00:15:05,195 --> 00:15:07,280 Well, why not? You changed Ned's grade.
- 00:15:07,448 --> 00:15:11,618 Well, that's different, okay? Because he was actually in love with me.
- 00:15:11,785 --> 00:15:15,038 No, he's not! He's totally yanking your chain.
- 00:15:15,205 --> 00:15:17,665 He's done this with three other teachers.
- 00:15:19,543 --> 00:15:21,711 - What? - He's got a girlfriend.
- 00:15:23,464 --> 00:15:26,549 I can't believe someone would do that for a grade.
- 00:15:26,717 --> 00:15:28,092 I know.
- 00:15:28,260 --> 00:15:29,510 It's awful.
- 00:15:31,597 --> 00:15:32,722 I love you.
- 00:15:36,894 --> 00:15:38,811 - Have you seen Chandler? - No, why?
- 00:15:38,979 --> 00:15:42,190 I just keep thinking about all these things I'm not gonna have...
- 00:15:42,358 --> 00:15:45,234 ...and it's freaking me out. I don't know what to do about it.
- 00:15:45,402 --> 00:15:46,778 Okay. Don't sweat it.
- 00:15:46,946 --> 00:15:51,574 Chandler is nowhere around, so get it out of your system. That guy's cute.
- 00:15:53,243 --> 00:15:54,911 Phoebe, come on, I'm serious.
- 00:15:56,580 --> 00:16:00,541 - I've just gotta talk to him about all this. - That is the last thing you wanna do.
- 00:16:01,001 --> 00:16:04,545 - Why? - Because you're marrying him!
- 00:16:05,214 --> 00:16:07,548 You gotta help me out here, Pheebs.
- 00:16:07,716 --> 00:16:11,094 All right, I've never been engaged and I've never really been married.
- 00:16:11,261 --> 00:16:13,930 But I can only tell you what my mother told me.
- 00:16:14,098 --> 00:16:18,351 Whenever you have doubts or fears or anxieties about a relationship...
- 00:16:18,519 --> 00:16:21,270 ...do not communicate them to your husband.
- 00:16:22,940 --> 00:16:26,609 So I'm not supposed to share my doubts and fears...
- 00:16:26,777 --> 00:16:29,278 ...with the guy I'm spending the rest of my life with?
- 00:16:29,446 --> 00:16:31,572 That is correct. Yes.
- 00:16:31,740 --> 00:16:35,284 You're supposed to put all that stuff in a little box in your mind...
- 00:16:35,452 --> 00:16:37,203 ...and then lock it up tight.
- 00:16:38,122 --> 00:16:39,956 - Your mother told you this? - Yes.
- 00:16:40,374 --> 00:16:44,085 The woman that got married a bunch of times and killed herself when you were 13?
- 00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:47,588 Oh, my God, you're right.
- 00:16:47,756 --> 00:16:50,758 All right, go. Go tell Chandler. Hurry, before it's too late!
- 00:16:50,926 --> 00:16:55,596 Wait, no! Does this also mean that putting out doesn't get you love?
- 00:17:01,020 --> 00:17:04,480 - I can't believe I'm gonna meet Jessica Ashley! - Wait, wait.
- 00:17:04,648 --> 00:17:07,859 Please be cool, okay? I work with this woman.
- 00:17:08,027 --> 00:17:10,028 - Okay, I'm totally cool. - Okay.
- 00:17:11,030 --> 00:17:12,530 JESSICA: Come in.
- 00:17:13,657 --> 00:17:14,782 Hey, Jessica.
- 00:17:14,950 --> 00:17:16,868 Hey, Jess.
- 00:17:17,453 --> 00:17:18,619 This is my friend Rachel.
- 00:17:18,829 --> 00:17:21,372 - Hi. - What's up?
- 00:17:24,460 --> 00:17:27,378 Uh, listen, here's your Soapie. I accepted it for you.
- 00:17:27,546 --> 00:17:31,549 Oh, my God. I won? Do you have any idea what this means?
- 00:17:34,762 --> 00:17:38,139 That's it. You're not gonna put it on your shelf or anything?
- 00:17:38,307 --> 00:17:43,227 No, I try to save that for real awards. Now if you'll excuse me?
- 00:17:44,688 --> 00:17:45,730 JOEY: Hm!
- 00:17:45,898 --> 00:17:47,106 - Take it back? - Absolutely.
- 00:17:47,274 --> 00:17:48,608 Yep.
- 00:17:52,988 --> 00:17:55,114 Yeah, you do.
- 00:17:57,409 --> 00:18:00,495 - Honey? As we get closer to the wedding... - Hm?
- 00:18:00,662 --> 00:18:03,247 ...is there anything you'd like to talk about or share?
- 00:18:03,499 --> 00:18:07,418 Okay. Well, I think the centerpieces are too big.
- 00:18:07,586 --> 00:18:09,837 You're wrong. The centerpieces are fine.
- 00:18:12,758 --> 00:18:16,094 - Do you ever get scared at all? - Kind of. They're really big.
- 00:18:17,971 --> 00:18:23,226 Doesn't it ever freak you out that you're never gonna be with anybody new again?
- 00:18:23,894 --> 00:18:25,061 What?
- 00:18:25,562 --> 00:18:26,604 Just...
- 00:18:26,772 --> 00:18:29,398 I love you so much. Just...
- 00:18:29,566 --> 00:18:33,277 It's just sometimes it bothers me that I'm never gonna have that feeling.
- 00:18:33,445 --> 00:18:35,738 When you first meet someone for the first time...
- 00:18:35,906 --> 00:18:39,450 ...and it's new and exciting. You know that rush?
- 00:18:40,035 --> 00:18:41,536 No.
- 00:18:42,454 --> 00:18:44,247 No, see, when I first meet somebody...
- 00:18:44,414 --> 00:18:49,669 ...it's mostly panic, anxiety and a great deal of sweating.
- 00:18:51,213 --> 00:18:53,256 Okay, but... All right, you're a guy.
- 00:18:53,423 --> 00:18:57,426 Does it not freak you out that you're never gonna sleep with anybody else?
- 00:18:57,761 --> 00:19:00,138 Sleeping with somebody, no.
- 00:19:00,305 --> 00:19:04,433 Anxiety, panic and I'm afraid even more sweating.
- 00:19:05,769 --> 00:19:06,978 Even with me?
- 00:19:07,146 --> 00:19:11,399 I was dangerously dehydrated during the first six months of our relationship.
- 00:19:13,152 --> 00:19:18,322 Look, for me the rush is knowing that we are gonna be together for the rest of our lives.
- 00:19:19,533 --> 00:19:21,742 - Really? - Well, yeah.
- 00:19:21,910 --> 00:19:27,248 Knowing you're having these thoughts, we're back to panic, anxiety and, uh...
- 00:19:27,416 --> 00:19:30,293 ...I'm definitely gonna need some kind of sports drink.
- 00:19:31,211 --> 00:19:32,461 Come here.
- 00:19:32,629 --> 00:19:36,215 Come here. Oh, sweetie, you don't have to worry.
- 00:19:36,550 --> 00:19:41,137 No. Besides, you know what? I'm gonna have a lot of new things with you.
- 00:19:41,305 --> 00:19:45,850 The first time we buy a house, our first kid, our first grandkid.
- 00:19:46,059 --> 00:19:48,477 Water. Water. Water.
- 00:19:50,480 --> 00:19:53,441 Uh, Mr. Morse? Can I speak to you for a moment?
- 00:19:56,320 --> 00:19:59,363 That was a great lecture today.
- 00:19:59,531 --> 00:20:00,823 - Did you get a haircut? - Mm-hm.
- 00:20:00,991 --> 00:20:04,619 Yeah, yeah. Do you like it? Do you love it?
- 00:20:06,371 --> 00:20:09,040 I want you to know that I'm changing your grade back.
- 00:20:09,208 --> 00:20:11,667 What? Why?
- 00:20:11,960 --> 00:20:15,588 Because I know what you're trying to pull here. It's not gonna work.
- 00:20:15,756 --> 00:20:20,426 I'm not trying to pull anything. Look, I love you, dude.
- 00:20:21,220 --> 00:20:25,431 You know what, I'm not even gonna talk about this. This little "thing" is over.
- 00:20:25,599 --> 00:20:30,561 I know you have a girlfriend. Yeah. And I know about the other professors.
- 00:20:30,729 --> 00:20:34,357 How do you think that makes me feel, Ned? You used me!
- 00:20:34,524 --> 00:20:36,817 You don't love me and you never did!
- 00:20:40,113 --> 00:20:42,740 Ah, Professor Winston. Professor Frederickson.
- 00:20:44,993 --> 00:20:47,286 I'll be right with you.
- 00:20:47,454 --> 00:20:50,498 Don't make this worse and I'll give you a C. Shall we?
- 00:20:57,047 --> 00:20:58,089 Rach?
- 00:20:58,257 --> 00:21:01,509 RACHEL: I'll be out in a second. - Hm.
- 00:21:05,806 --> 00:21:07,890 "It's just so unexpected! I...
- 00:21:08,058 --> 00:21:09,725 Ha-ha-ha.
- 00:21:10,519 --> 00:21:14,730 I'll tell you, it's just such an honor to just be nominated...
- 00:21:14,898 --> 00:21:17,817 ...for a Nobel Prize.
- 00:21:18,568 --> 00:21:23,572 And, you know, to win one for a massage! Oh...
- 00:21:23,740 --> 00:21:27,660 Especially after having just won a Tony Award for Best Actress..."
- 00:21:27,828 --> 00:21:29,745 We have to go. Our reservations are at 8.
- 00:21:29,913 --> 00:21:33,499 "...in Reservations at Eight by Neil Simon.
- 00:21:33,709 --> 00:21:37,545 Thank you, Neil. Thank you for the words."
- 00:21:38,088 --> 00:21:40,840 You can finish this later. We're gonna be late. We gotta go.
- 00:21:41,008 --> 00:21:43,342 Please don't play the music. Just one more thing.
- 00:21:43,510 --> 00:21:44,552 Okay.
- 00:21:44,720 --> 00:21:48,681 "Live from New York, it's Saturday Night!"
- 00:21:52,894 --> 00:21:54,895 [English - US - SDH]
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