Эпизод c новым мозгом Джоуи
Описание
Джоуи узнает, что его персонаж в сериале «Дни нашей жизни», доктор Дрейк Раморей, выйдет из комы после пересадки мозга убитой героини, Джессики Локхарт, в его тело. В надежде узнать больше о мотивации Джессики в сериале, Джоуи навещает актрису, играющую Джессику, Сесилию Монро (Сьюзан Сарандон), и случайно сообщает ей, что Джессику убьют, а доктора Дрейка Раморея вернут в сериал, что приводит Сесилию в ярость. Затем Джоуи очаровывает Сесилию, чтобы они вместе работали над сохранением наследия Джессики в сериале, и в итоге они проводят ночь вместе. Росс готовит особый сюрприз на свадьбу своей сестры: ужасную игру на волынке. После того, как симпатичный парень случайно оставляет свой телефон в кофейне, Фиби и Рэйчел соревнуются за то, кто его заберет, чтобы начать «сказку для цифровой эпохи». Позже пожилой джентльмен заходит в квартиру Фиби, чтобы забрать телефон, и, к большому удивлению Рейчел, Фиби с радостью идет с ним на ужин, так как он ей кажется привлекательнее, чем симпатичный парень из кофейни.
Субтитры
- 00:00:02,293 --> 00:00:03,752 So thanks for coming by, guys.
- 00:00:03,920 --> 00:00:07,172 We wanted to bounce some ideas off of you about the wedding ceremony.
- 00:00:07,340 --> 00:00:08,799 Oh.
- 00:00:09,009 --> 00:00:12,011 - What's the matter? Are you okay? - Yeah, it's just...
- 00:00:12,178 --> 00:00:14,722 Monica said "wedding."
- 00:00:15,056 --> 00:00:18,642 Uh, so we wanted to know if one of you would like to read something.
- 00:00:18,810 --> 00:00:22,438 Okay, yeah, I guess I can do that too.
- 00:00:23,857 --> 00:00:25,357 Too?
- 00:00:25,984 --> 00:00:29,486 Yeah, I kind of, ahem, have something else planned for you guys.
- 00:00:29,654 --> 00:00:32,573 - Do you mind telling us what it is? - Sorry.
- 00:00:32,741 --> 00:00:35,993 I'm kind of keeping this one on the QT.
- 00:00:36,161 --> 00:00:38,829 Well, whatever it is, I hope it involves winking.
- 00:00:41,291 --> 00:00:42,750 - Hey. ALL: Hey.
- 00:00:42,917 --> 00:00:45,044 So I talked to one of the DOOL writers...
- 00:00:45,211 --> 00:00:47,296 - What is DOOL? - Days Of Our Lives.
- 00:00:49,340 --> 00:00:53,177 You're not gonna believe it. My character is coming out of his coma!
- 00:00:53,344 --> 00:00:55,012 - That's wonderful. - Wow, Joey.
- 00:00:55,180 --> 00:00:59,266 And not only that. I'm getting a new brain!
- 00:01:00,185 --> 00:01:04,480 So great things are happening at work and in your personal life.
- 00:01:05,148 --> 00:01:07,274 What do you mean you're getting a new brain?
- 00:01:07,442 --> 00:01:10,360 They're killing off one of the characters, and when she dies...
- 00:01:10,528 --> 00:01:13,322 ...and her brain is being transplanted into my body.
- 00:01:14,908 --> 00:01:18,702 Heh, what? A brain transplant?
- 00:01:18,870 --> 00:01:20,496 It's ridiculous.
- 00:01:20,663 --> 00:01:24,208 I think it's ridiculous that you haven't had sex in three and a half months.
- 00:01:28,630 --> 00:01:32,382 It's winter. There are fewer people on the street.
- 00:01:33,802 --> 00:01:35,135 Who are they killing off?
- 00:01:35,303 --> 00:01:37,805 Uh, Cecilia Monroe. She plays Jessica Lockhart.
- 00:01:38,056 --> 00:01:39,765 - No! - No!
- 00:01:40,225 --> 00:01:43,811 She is so good at throwing drinks in people's faces.
- 00:01:44,062 --> 00:01:46,730 I don't think I've ever seen her finish a beverage.
- 00:01:46,981 --> 00:01:49,650 The way she slaps people. Wouldn't you love to do that?
- 00:01:49,818 --> 00:01:51,276 Don't do it.
- 00:01:52,112 --> 00:01:53,987 And she's been on the show forever.
- 00:01:54,155 --> 00:01:56,949 - It's gonna be really hard to fill her shoes. - Yeah.
- 00:01:57,117 --> 00:01:58,575 Help me out here. When you...
- 00:01:58,743 --> 00:02:03,247 When you come out of the "brain transplant"...
- 00:02:03,414 --> 00:02:06,166 ...you are going to be her?
- 00:02:06,334 --> 00:02:09,253 Yes, but in Drake Ramoray's body.
- 00:02:09,796 --> 00:02:12,005 [STAMMERS]
- 00:02:12,173 --> 00:02:15,759 Why is this so hard for you to get? I thought you were a scientist.
- 00:02:54,757 --> 00:02:56,508 Rach, so that guy there:
- 00:02:56,759 --> 00:02:57,843 Straight or gay?
- 00:02:59,220 --> 00:03:00,554 RACHEL: Oh.
- 00:03:00,722 --> 00:03:03,682 Oh, yeah, he's too cute to be straight. Ha, ha.
- 00:03:05,143 --> 00:03:07,227 Ooh, Knockers will help us figure it out.
- 00:03:12,942 --> 00:03:14,651 All right, straight.
- 00:03:15,445 --> 00:03:17,654 And not subtle.
- 00:03:19,532 --> 00:03:21,450 - He left his cell phone. - Oh?
- 00:03:21,618 --> 00:03:24,369 We could hand it to Gunther, he'll put it in lost and found.
- 00:03:24,537 --> 00:03:28,081 Or we could use it to call China, see how those guys are doing.
- 00:03:28,791 --> 00:03:32,794 What if, uh, he calls his own cell phone to find out who found it, and I answer...
- 00:03:32,962 --> 00:03:35,589 ...and we start talking and we fell in love?
- 00:03:35,798 --> 00:03:37,966 Wouldn't that be a great story?
- 00:03:38,218 --> 00:03:41,720 - Kind of like a fairy tale for the digital age. - Yeah.
- 00:03:41,888 --> 00:03:44,056 That does sound great. I'm gonna get the phone.
- 00:03:44,265 --> 00:03:47,559 What? Wait. Why do you get the story?
- 00:03:47,769 --> 00:03:50,479 I don't know. I haven't been out on a date in so long.
- 00:03:50,730 --> 00:03:53,190 Phoebe, you had a date three days ago.
- 00:03:53,441 --> 00:03:58,028 That wasn't a date. That was friends getting together and having sex.
- 00:03:58,279 --> 00:04:00,405 Okay. Great. See, I get the phone.
- 00:04:00,573 --> 00:04:03,825 No way. You just broke up with Tag a week ago.
- 00:04:03,993 --> 00:04:09,289 Yeah, and until now, I didn't think I would love again.
- 00:04:10,291 --> 00:04:11,583 - Nice try. - Hey, wait.
- 00:04:11,834 --> 00:04:14,962 How do we fairly decide who gets the phone?
- 00:04:15,129 --> 00:04:16,964 I don't know.
- 00:04:22,053 --> 00:04:23,220 Well, um...
- 00:04:23,930 --> 00:04:26,348 Maybe we could, uh...
- 00:04:27,517 --> 00:04:30,102 Ah-ha! Too slow! Ha-ha-ha.
- 00:04:31,020 --> 00:04:33,647 Ah-ha! Too cocky.
- 00:04:38,069 --> 00:04:40,487 I'm going to date him. There's nothing you can do.
- 00:04:40,697 --> 00:04:41,780 Yes, there is.
- 00:04:41,948 --> 00:04:45,158 What, are you going to kill him like you did Charles?
- 00:04:47,161 --> 00:04:49,997 Oh, my baby.
- 00:04:54,419 --> 00:04:55,836 DIRECTOR: Cut!
- 00:04:56,170 --> 00:04:57,754 [APPLAUSE]
- 00:05:00,049 --> 00:05:04,594 That was a great scene. And that slap looked so real. How do you do that?
- 00:05:04,804 --> 00:05:08,432 - Oh, just years of experience. - Can I get some ice here?
- 00:05:10,184 --> 00:05:12,936 Anyway, I just wanted to say how wonderful I think you are.
- 00:05:13,354 --> 00:05:15,856 You're not the fan who's dying, are you?
- 00:05:16,316 --> 00:05:20,068 No, uh, I'm Joey Tribbiani. We did a scene together yesterday.
- 00:05:20,278 --> 00:05:23,655 - I'm the guy in the coma. - Oh, that was a real person?
- 00:05:26,159 --> 00:05:30,037 I wanted to say, since I'm getting your brain when you leave the show...
- 00:05:30,204 --> 00:05:33,415 ...I was wondering if there was any tips... - I'm leaving the show?
- 00:05:33,583 --> 00:05:35,876 I don't know, why? Did you hear something?
- 00:05:37,545 --> 00:05:40,088 - Who told you that? - Oh, uh...
- 00:05:40,256 --> 00:05:43,508 - One of the writers. - Which? Was it bald or was it tall?
- 00:05:44,510 --> 00:05:47,679 You know, it doesn't matter, because it is not true.
- 00:05:47,847 --> 00:05:48,972 Okay. Whoo, eh.
- 00:05:49,223 --> 00:05:52,893 And if it were true, how dare you come to me and ask me for tips...
- 00:05:53,102 --> 00:05:55,854 ...about a character I've been playing for 20 years!
- 00:06:01,235 --> 00:06:04,446 Miss Monroe... Oh, there you go.
- 00:06:08,242 --> 00:06:09,576 Okay, look, I have an idea.
- 00:06:09,786 --> 00:06:13,580 Why don't we see what kind of numbers he has on his speed dial?
- 00:06:13,748 --> 00:06:16,792 And then from that, we can tell who has more in common with him...
- 00:06:16,959 --> 00:06:18,877 ...and whoever does gets the phone.
- 00:06:19,545 --> 00:06:22,339 - Fine. All right. - All right.
- 00:06:22,673 --> 00:06:25,884 - First name on the speed dial is "Mom." - Oh.
- 00:06:26,052 --> 00:06:28,929 I lost my mom to suicide.
- 00:06:29,097 --> 00:06:30,180 Okay, no way.
- 00:06:30,348 --> 00:06:33,058 You can't use that to get the cute guy and the last muffin.
- 00:06:33,226 --> 00:06:36,144 Did I use that already today? I'm sorry.
- 00:06:37,230 --> 00:06:40,690 "Ben, Carlos, David..."
- 00:06:40,858 --> 00:06:43,860 Oh, I win. He's got Barney's on his speed dial.
- 00:06:44,028 --> 00:06:46,363 So? You don't know that it's Barney's the store.
- 00:06:46,531 --> 00:06:49,491 That could be his friend's house, or a bar, or...
- 00:06:49,659 --> 00:06:52,244 Who has Barney's the store on their speed dial?
- 00:06:52,412 --> 00:06:54,579 His new girlfriend.
- 00:06:59,168 --> 00:07:01,253 [BAGPIPES DRONING IN DISTANCE]
- 00:07:01,421 --> 00:07:03,547 [BAGPIPES SCREECHING]
- 00:07:08,636 --> 00:07:09,928 What is that?
- 00:07:10,096 --> 00:07:12,848 I think it's the Dying Cat Parade.
- 00:07:14,976 --> 00:07:17,853 Sounds like it's coming from across the street.
- 00:07:18,020 --> 00:07:21,440 - Oh, my God. - What?
- 00:07:21,607 --> 00:07:23,900 The thing that Ross was gonna do at our wedding?
- 00:07:24,152 --> 00:07:28,363 He was hanging out with me yesterday and he said, "You're half Scottish, right?"
- 00:07:28,531 --> 00:07:31,825 No. There is no way. It cannot be Ross.
- 00:07:39,792 --> 00:07:43,420 Unbelievable. Why is your family Scottish?
- 00:07:44,839 --> 00:07:47,591 Why is your family Ross?
- 00:07:49,135 --> 00:07:52,262 He cannot play at our wedding. Everyone will leave.
- 00:07:52,430 --> 00:07:55,307 I mean, come on. That is just noise!
- 00:07:55,475 --> 00:07:57,392 It's not even a song.
- 00:07:57,977 --> 00:08:01,188 Wait. If you listen very carefully, I think...
- 00:08:01,355 --> 00:08:04,149 ...it's "Celebration" by Kool and the Gang.
- 00:08:10,239 --> 00:08:13,366 You're absolutely right. They are writing me out of the show.
- 00:08:13,534 --> 00:08:17,162 They don't know exactly when it's going to happen, but apparently it's soon...
- 00:08:17,330 --> 00:08:18,830 ...and then that's it.
- 00:08:18,998 --> 00:08:22,125 I'm sorry. If it was up to me, you would never leave the show.
- 00:08:22,293 --> 00:08:24,294 - Yeah, thanks. - No, I mean it.
- 00:08:24,462 --> 00:08:27,797 I can't believe they'd do this to you. And to your fans.
- 00:08:28,007 --> 00:08:32,385 They're gonna be devastated. Heartbroken. They love you so much.
- 00:08:33,012 --> 00:08:34,888 Oh, you're right.
- 00:08:35,556 --> 00:08:36,806 Thank you.
- 00:08:37,058 --> 00:08:38,850 - What's your name again? - Uh...
- 00:08:39,977 --> 00:08:41,811 - Joey. - Joey. Well, thank you.
- 00:08:41,979 --> 00:08:44,606 That is so sweet. Oh.
- 00:08:44,774 --> 00:08:47,192 The... The only reason I came up to you before...
- 00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:49,236 ...was because, well...
- 00:08:49,487 --> 00:08:52,614 ...because I'm really nervous about being you.
- 00:08:52,782 --> 00:08:56,576 You know, if you could help me capture the essence of the character.
- 00:08:56,744 --> 00:08:59,704 Help me keep Jessica alive. Please?
- 00:09:02,166 --> 00:09:03,708 All right, Joey, I will help you.
- 00:09:03,876 --> 00:09:07,420 Not because I owe it to this stupid show...
- 00:09:07,588 --> 00:09:10,840 ...but because I owe it to Jessica.
- 00:09:11,008 --> 00:09:13,885 - Oh, that's great. Thank you so much. - You're so welcome.
- 00:09:14,053 --> 00:09:16,763 I've been watching some tapes. How's this?
- 00:09:17,640 --> 00:09:21,101 [IN BRITISH ACCENT] Jessica Lockhart will never step foot in this place again!
- 00:09:21,269 --> 00:09:22,602 Ever!
- 00:09:24,480 --> 00:09:28,692 Oh, but, Jessica doesn't have an English accent.
- 00:09:28,901 --> 00:09:31,027 I can do an English accent?
- 00:09:33,155 --> 00:09:35,156 That baby's going on my resume.
- 00:09:38,160 --> 00:09:39,411 [KNOCKING ON DOOR]
- 00:09:39,620 --> 00:09:41,663 - Hi, Pheebs. How are you? - Good.
- 00:09:41,831 --> 00:09:44,583 Um, Phoebe, remember when we were in the coffeehouse...
- 00:09:44,750 --> 00:09:47,877 ...we decided I was gonna keep the cute guy's phone?
- 00:09:48,045 --> 00:09:50,589 - Yeah. - And I was gonna keep it in my purse...
- 00:09:50,756 --> 00:09:53,550 ...so if it rang, I could just pick it up? - Yeah.
- 00:09:53,718 --> 00:09:58,138 And then do you remember going into my purse and stealing the phone?
- 00:09:59,599 --> 00:10:00,974 Ooh, now you lost me.
- 00:10:01,142 --> 00:10:03,602 - You stole the phone. - No, I didn't.
- 00:10:03,769 --> 00:10:06,813 No? So you're saying that if I called it, it wouldn't ring?
- 00:10:06,981 --> 00:10:08,148 - No. - Hmm. Okay.
- 00:10:08,316 --> 00:10:11,985 But while you dial, let me show you the features of my new ringing handbag.
- 00:10:12,153 --> 00:10:13,194 Mm.
- 00:10:13,362 --> 00:10:14,529 [PHONE RINGING]
- 00:10:14,697 --> 00:10:16,656 Oh, it does work.
- 00:10:18,075 --> 00:10:20,076 - Phoebe. - That is a different phone.
- 00:10:20,244 --> 00:10:24,914 Oh, is it? Hello. Yes, hi. Is Rachel there?
- 00:10:25,082 --> 00:10:28,627 Yes, she is. Just one moment, please. It's for me!
- 00:10:30,630 --> 00:10:32,422 - That is damning evidence. - Ugh.
- 00:10:33,174 --> 00:10:34,257 [PHONE RINGING]
- 00:10:34,467 --> 00:10:37,677 Oh, my God. I bet that's him.
- 00:10:37,845 --> 00:10:40,180 My digital fairy tale's about to begin.
- 00:10:41,349 --> 00:10:42,766 It's ri...
- 00:10:42,933 --> 00:10:45,143 Would you stop doing that?
- 00:10:45,311 --> 00:10:48,313 Hello? Yes, I'm the one who found your phone.
- 00:10:48,481 --> 00:10:51,107 - Phoebe, you can't do th... - Shh, I'm on a call.
- 00:10:53,319 --> 00:10:57,280 Well, yeah, I mean, you could pick it up tonight. Say, 8:30?
- 00:10:57,448 --> 00:11:00,241 At my apartment. It's, um...
- 00:11:00,409 --> 00:11:03,953 It's, um, 5 Morton Street, apartment 14.
- 00:11:04,121 --> 00:11:08,375 And then maybe, you know, after, we could grab a bite to eat or whatever.
- 00:11:08,542 --> 00:11:11,044 Okay. Okay, I'll see you then. Bye.
- 00:11:13,422 --> 00:11:16,049 You do know that I will be here when he comes over.
- 00:11:16,217 --> 00:11:18,468 Oh, and how will you know what time to come over?
- 00:11:18,636 --> 00:11:20,970 You just said it.
- 00:11:23,974 --> 00:11:25,183 Oh.
- 00:11:28,562 --> 00:11:33,525 Joey, the essence of the character is rooted in her confidence.
- 00:11:33,693 --> 00:11:37,320 So when Jessica enters a room, for instance...
- 00:11:37,488 --> 00:11:39,531 ...she owns everything...
- 00:11:39,699 --> 00:11:43,576 ...and every person in that room.
- 00:11:44,870 --> 00:11:46,663 - You try it. - Okay.
- 00:11:54,922 --> 00:11:57,006 Right. Well, he's not mad at the room.
- 00:11:58,300 --> 00:12:01,428 Try it again. He owns it. He owns the room.
- 00:12:01,595 --> 00:12:06,266 It is his. He owns, owns, owns the room! He owns it!
- 00:12:06,934 --> 00:12:09,185 It's a little weird, but it's getting better.
- 00:12:11,105 --> 00:12:15,275 Oh, I'm gonna miss this woman so much. I don't know what I'm gonna do.
- 00:12:15,443 --> 00:12:17,944 It's been 20 years of my life.
- 00:12:18,112 --> 00:12:22,115 Hey, hey. Maybe... Maybe, uh... Maybe this is a good thing.
- 00:12:22,283 --> 00:12:26,161 You know? Lt'll give you a chance to shake things up. Play different characters.
- 00:12:26,328 --> 00:12:27,829 You're so talented.
- 00:12:27,997 --> 00:12:32,584 Probably should've just left years ago when the offers were pouring in...
- 00:12:32,752 --> 00:12:35,628 ...but, you know, I just got so comfy here and...
- 00:12:35,796 --> 00:12:38,673 Ugh, I turned down some amazing work.
- 00:12:38,841 --> 00:12:41,134 - Like what? - Well...
- 00:12:41,302 --> 00:12:43,887 ...let's just say if I'd left 15 years ago...
- 00:12:44,054 --> 00:12:48,808 ...the landscape of Mexican cinema would be very different today.
- 00:12:50,770 --> 00:12:52,479 Wow.
- 00:12:53,898 --> 00:12:58,943 But, well, now... Now's a different time for me.
- 00:13:00,780 --> 00:13:04,783 Oh, hey, come on. Don't, uh... Don't do this.
- 00:13:05,034 --> 00:13:07,285 Let me tell you something, okay?
- 00:13:07,536 --> 00:13:12,081 When I watch you do a scene, I'm thinking, "Boy, she is a great actress."
- 00:13:12,249 --> 00:13:16,711 But... But I'm also thinking, "She is hot."
- 00:13:19,298 --> 00:13:21,382 You think I'm hot?
- 00:13:22,718 --> 00:13:24,636 You own the room.
- 00:13:25,679 --> 00:13:27,263 [CHUCKLES]
- 00:13:29,016 --> 00:13:31,059 We... We should probably get the...
- 00:13:31,227 --> 00:13:33,478 Oh, yeah. Yeah, we should get...
- 00:13:37,775 --> 00:13:41,820 So when Jessica kisses a man...
- 00:13:42,822 --> 00:13:45,281 ...she usually puts, um...
- 00:13:45,449 --> 00:13:48,660 ...both her hands on the man's face.
- 00:13:48,828 --> 00:13:51,412 Yeah, I notice that. Is that because she's so passionate?
- 00:13:51,580 --> 00:13:54,958 No, it's because that way the camera only sees her.
- 00:13:58,921 --> 00:14:00,755 You want to try it?
- 00:14:01,090 --> 00:14:03,091 Yeah, okay.
- 00:14:15,271 --> 00:14:17,897 That was good. That was really good.
- 00:14:19,567 --> 00:14:22,986 But I think that maybe your hands are just a little off.
- 00:14:23,153 --> 00:14:25,363 - They should be, maybe... Like, right... - Mm.
- 00:14:33,622 --> 00:14:35,790 Well, I feel like a snack.
- 00:14:36,041 --> 00:14:39,669 Do you want some shortbread? It's Scottish, like you are.
- 00:14:40,170 --> 00:14:44,299 Oh, no, thanks. I don't like anything from my Scottish heritage.
- 00:14:44,550 --> 00:14:46,050 What?
- 00:14:46,719 --> 00:14:50,722 Well, it's just that my entire family was run out of Scotland by...
- 00:14:51,932 --> 00:14:53,516 ...Vikings.
- 00:14:54,351 --> 00:14:59,147 It sounds to me like your family's ready to, uh, rediscover its Scottish roots.
- 00:14:59,398 --> 00:15:01,691 You can't play bagpipes at the wedding!
- 00:15:03,235 --> 00:15:04,777 How did you know about that?
- 00:15:04,945 --> 00:15:07,280 We heard you play all the way from your apartment.
- 00:15:07,448 --> 00:15:09,782 Were you the ones who called the cops?
- 00:15:11,035 --> 00:15:13,328 That's not really important right now. Ahem.
- 00:15:13,495 --> 00:15:17,081 What is important is, while we appreciate the gesture...
- 00:15:17,291 --> 00:15:21,461 ...we just don't feel that bagpipes are appropriate for our wedding.
- 00:15:21,712 --> 00:15:25,298 - Why not? - Because we hate them.
- 00:15:25,466 --> 00:15:29,302 Just give me a chance to perform for you, and then decide whatever you want.
- 00:15:29,470 --> 00:15:33,056 I'm not gonna tell you what song I'm gonna play, either. But, uh...
- 00:15:33,223 --> 00:15:35,099 ...let's just say when it's over...
- 00:15:35,267 --> 00:15:39,103 ...I'll bet there'll be a wee bit o' celebration.
- 00:15:46,236 --> 00:15:48,029 Hey, hey!
- 00:15:48,364 --> 00:15:49,489 [KNOCKING ON DOOR]
- 00:15:49,698 --> 00:15:51,824 [IN UNISON] Who is it?
- 00:15:51,992 --> 00:15:53,034 TOM: Hi, It's Tom.
- 00:15:53,202 --> 00:15:55,078 - I'm here to pick up the phone. - Ah!
- 00:15:56,121 --> 00:15:58,498 Whoa, why do you get to answer the door?
- 00:15:58,666 --> 00:16:01,501 - Why shouldn't I? - Because it's my apartment.
- 00:16:01,669 --> 00:16:03,878 Well, then I get to give him the phone.
- 00:16:04,046 --> 00:16:07,423 Okay. Good luck explaining all the calls to China.
- 00:16:10,427 --> 00:16:11,719 Hi.
- 00:16:15,808 --> 00:16:18,101 Wow, how long were we arguing for?
- 00:16:21,146 --> 00:16:22,522 Um, ha, ha.
- 00:16:22,690 --> 00:16:24,941 You're not the man who left the cell phone.
- 00:16:25,109 --> 00:16:28,236 - No, that's my assistant. - Is he coming?
- 00:16:28,404 --> 00:16:30,697 Um, no.
- 00:16:30,864 --> 00:16:33,324 Could you, uh, give us one second?
- 00:16:33,492 --> 00:16:36,035 - Sure. - We'll be right back, sir.
- 00:16:37,496 --> 00:16:41,124 - Well, what do we do? - I don't know.
- 00:16:41,291 --> 00:16:42,625 Can you believe this?
- 00:16:42,793 --> 00:16:46,045 We were waiting for a hot guy and an even hotter one shows up.
- 00:16:46,213 --> 00:16:47,922 I know...
- 00:16:51,552 --> 00:16:53,011 What?
- 00:16:53,178 --> 00:16:54,345 Rachel, listen...
- 00:16:54,513 --> 00:16:58,725 ...if you let me have him, then I will really owe you one.
- 00:17:00,310 --> 00:17:02,228 All right.
- 00:17:04,106 --> 00:17:06,399 All right, Phoebe, I will let you have him.
- 00:17:06,650 --> 00:17:08,776 But you owe me. You owe me big.
- 00:17:08,944 --> 00:17:12,488 So which one of you lovely ladies am I gonna take to dinner, huh?
- 00:17:12,656 --> 00:17:14,824 Oh, that'd be me, sir.
- 00:17:16,035 --> 00:17:18,202 - After you. - Okay, thank you.
- 00:17:19,621 --> 00:17:20,997 [MOUTHS] Nice.
- 00:17:26,503 --> 00:17:29,881 Well, you certainly own that room.
- 00:17:31,967 --> 00:17:33,551 Actually, I rent the whole place.
- 00:17:33,719 --> 00:17:36,054 And I just got what you meant. Thank you.
- 00:17:36,221 --> 00:17:38,139 [LAUGHING]
- 00:17:39,224 --> 00:17:40,808 - Hi. JOEY: Hey.
- 00:17:42,352 --> 00:17:45,897 Oh, my God.
- 00:17:46,065 --> 00:17:50,401 Aah! Jessica Lockhart! In my apartment!
- 00:17:50,569 --> 00:17:53,905 I am such a huge fan. I am such a huge fan.
- 00:17:54,073 --> 00:17:55,490 Well, it's nice to know that...
- 00:17:55,657 --> 00:17:58,201 [YELLS] Monica! Monica!
- 00:17:58,744 --> 00:18:01,204 That, uh... That's my roommate, Rachel.
- 00:18:01,371 --> 00:18:03,498 Oh, that explains all the women's underwear.
- 00:18:03,665 --> 00:18:05,333 Sure. Yeah.
- 00:18:06,001 --> 00:18:09,128 Oh, my God, it's true!
- 00:18:10,172 --> 00:18:11,464 Oh, my God.
- 00:18:11,632 --> 00:18:14,801 Can I just ask you to do me... Aw... . Just one favor?
- 00:18:14,968 --> 00:18:16,469 Certainly.
- 00:18:16,637 --> 00:18:19,514 Would you slap me? Would you slap me right here in the face?
- 00:18:21,141 --> 00:18:24,268 I'd love to, but my lawyer said I can't do that anymore.
- 00:18:26,313 --> 00:18:28,356 - All right, here we go. - Okay.
- 00:18:28,524 --> 00:18:31,567 No, wait. Just one moment. Um...
- 00:18:32,736 --> 00:18:34,987 - You're a stupid bitch. - I really can't slap you.
- 00:18:35,155 --> 00:18:36,823 [GROWLS]
- 00:18:36,990 --> 00:18:40,535 - My God, you're great. - Thanks for stopping by. See you.
- 00:18:42,329 --> 00:18:44,539 - I am so sorry about that. - Oh, no, no, no.
- 00:18:44,706 --> 00:18:47,667 Being adored, I'm used to it. Don't worry about it.
- 00:18:48,877 --> 00:18:50,545 - Oh, my God. - What?
- 00:18:50,712 --> 00:18:53,714 They sent me today's script. They never send me the script.
- 00:18:53,882 --> 00:18:56,092 - They don't? - Well, no, I'm in a coma.
- 00:18:56,260 --> 00:18:58,678 This must mean I have lines.
- 00:19:00,347 --> 00:19:01,973 Oh.
- 00:19:02,933 --> 00:19:04,725 How does it happen?
- 00:19:07,312 --> 00:19:08,646 Ooh.
- 00:19:08,814 --> 00:19:12,441 You get thrown from a horse into an electric fence.
- 00:19:14,319 --> 00:19:16,696 A what? Jessica hates horses.
- 00:19:16,864 --> 00:19:20,783 I'm guessing after this she's not gonna be crazy about electricity, either.
- 00:19:25,622 --> 00:19:29,500 Loosening the saddle on Mother's horse was brilliant, Fredrick.
- 00:19:29,668 --> 00:19:32,211 And the electric fence, inspired.
- 00:19:32,379 --> 00:19:33,796 Thank you, sweetheart.
- 00:19:34,756 --> 00:19:37,175 I can't believe she's really gone.
- 00:19:37,759 --> 00:19:40,469 Look around you. All of this is ours.
- 00:19:40,637 --> 00:19:42,555 I don't think so.
- 00:19:47,603 --> 00:19:48,811 Who are you?
- 00:19:48,979 --> 00:19:50,813 What's the matter, Dina?
- 00:19:50,981 --> 00:19:53,774 Don't you recognize your own...
- 00:19:53,942 --> 00:19:55,401 ...mother?
- 00:19:58,363 --> 00:20:01,073 DIRECTOR: Cut! That was great, everybody. Thank you.
- 00:20:01,241 --> 00:20:03,618 That was so wonderful!
- 00:20:03,785 --> 00:20:07,205 Oh, I think that you're a better Jessica than I ever was.
- 00:20:07,372 --> 00:20:10,249 - Oh, no. - Of course not, but you were very good.
- 00:20:10,417 --> 00:20:11,667 Heh, thanks.
- 00:20:11,835 --> 00:20:14,212 Guess what? Good news. I got another job.
- 00:20:14,379 --> 00:20:16,797 Great. Hey, all right! What is it?
- 00:20:16,965 --> 00:20:19,300 A film in Guadalajara.
- 00:20:20,260 --> 00:20:22,053 The airport?
- 00:20:23,889 --> 00:20:25,514 No, that's LaGuardia.
- 00:20:29,228 --> 00:20:32,563 - This is Mexico. - Oh, wow.
- 00:20:32,814 --> 00:20:35,107 Well, how long will you be gone?
- 00:20:35,275 --> 00:20:37,193 Eight months.
- 00:20:38,028 --> 00:20:41,697 - That's a really long time. - Yeah, but you could come and visit me.
- 00:20:41,865 --> 00:20:46,202 I bet that you could, uh, own a few places down there.
- 00:20:46,954 --> 00:20:51,082 Oh, you know, I should probably buy a place in the city first.
- 00:20:53,126 --> 00:20:55,419 And I just got what you meant. That is a...
- 00:20:55,587 --> 00:20:58,339 - I'll tell you, that's a tricky one. - It's a tricky one.
- 00:20:58,507 --> 00:21:00,049 Well...
- 00:21:02,219 --> 00:21:03,469 Good luck.
- 00:21:04,221 --> 00:21:05,805 You too.
- 00:21:21,113 --> 00:21:24,865 Ahem. Okay, now, uh, remember, I'm still learning.
- 00:21:25,325 --> 00:21:27,827 [BAGPIPES DRONING THEN SQUEAKING]
- 00:21:34,584 --> 00:21:36,794 One, two, three, four!
- 00:21:36,962 --> 00:21:39,964 [PLAYING KOOL AND THE GANG'S "CELEBRATION"]
- 00:21:54,980 --> 00:21:57,481 You know the song. Sing along.
- 00:21:59,860 --> 00:22:03,279 [MIMICKING BAGPIPES]
- 00:22:14,708 --> 00:22:15,916 So?
- 00:22:16,626 --> 00:22:17,793 - No! - No!
- 00:22:22,799 --> 00:22:24,800 [English - US - SDH]
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