Эпизод, в котором все могло быть иначе, Часть 1
Описание
Компания друзей размышляет о том, какой могла бы быть их жизнь, если бы Росс и Кэрол остались в браке, Моника никогда бы не похудела, Чендлер стал бы писателем, Джои продолжал бы работать в сериале «Дни нашей жизни», Рейчел вышла бы замуж за Барри, а Фиби стала бы биржевым брокером. Затем действие переносится в альтернативную реальность. Чендлер, изо всех сил пытающийся опубликовать свои произведения, становится помощником Джои, и результаты неоднозначны. Моника планирует лишиться девственности со своим парнем Роджером, но плотный график Роджера мешает этому; когда Чендлер пытается её утешить, они оказываются вместе в постели. Росс пытается разнообразить свой брак с Кэрол, предлагая секс втроём, и, когда его исключают из процесса, он понимает, что Кэрол — лесбиянка. Рейчел мгновенно влюбляется в Джои после первой встречи в Central Perk, и они чуть не заводят роман, прежде чем Рейчел обнаруживает, что Барри ей изменяет. Фиби теряет миллионы долларов из-за банкротства фирмы, попадает в больницу с инфарктом, вызванным стрессом, и впоследствии её увольняют (что приводит к повторному инфаркту); она начинает черпать музыкальное вдохновение из своих переживаний, близких к смерти.
Субтитры
- 00:00:02,627 --> 00:00:04,503 Hey, you guys, guess what?
- 00:00:04,671 --> 00:00:06,922 Barry and Mindy are getting a divorce.
- 00:00:07,090 --> 00:00:08,173 [ALL CHATTERING]
- 00:00:08,341 --> 00:00:10,592 What is the matter with you?
- 00:00:12,804 --> 00:00:15,097 No. Barry and Mindy.
- 00:00:15,265 --> 00:00:18,559 Oh, sorry. I hear "divorce," I immediately go to Ross. Heh.
- 00:00:19,978 --> 00:00:21,437 Who's Barry and Mindy?
- 00:00:21,604 --> 00:00:24,940 Barry was the guy I almost married, and Mindy was my best friend.
- 00:00:25,108 --> 00:00:26,775 Wasn't he cheating on you with her?
- 00:00:26,943 --> 00:00:30,404 That just means he was falling asleep on top of her instead of me.
- 00:00:31,906 --> 00:00:35,743 Can you imagine if I'd married him? How different would my life be?
- 00:00:35,994 --> 00:00:38,871 I know. I've always wondered how different life would be...
- 00:00:39,039 --> 00:00:40,789 ...if I'd never gotten divorced.
- 00:00:40,957 --> 00:00:42,916 - Which time? - The first time!
- 00:00:44,044 --> 00:00:47,171 Imagine if Carol hadn't realized she was a lesbian.
- 00:00:49,466 --> 00:00:52,718 I can't. I keep seeing it the good way.
- 00:00:54,054 --> 00:00:56,430 I bet I'd still be doing my karate.
- 00:00:57,974 --> 00:01:02,770 Towards the end of our marriage, I did karate as a way of releasing the tension...
- 00:01:03,021 --> 00:01:06,190 ...from, you know, not doing anything else physical.
- 00:01:06,357 --> 00:01:08,859 Maybe the problem was pronouncing it "ka-ra-tay."
- 00:01:10,445 --> 00:01:12,237 What if I was still fat?
- 00:01:12,405 --> 00:01:14,823 You wouldn't be dating me, that's for sure.
- 00:01:14,991 --> 00:01:16,366 Sure I would.
- 00:01:16,534 --> 00:01:17,826 [ALL CHATTERING]
- 00:01:17,994 --> 00:01:20,370 What? You guys think I'm that shallow?
- 00:01:20,538 --> 00:01:22,289 No, I think Monica was that fat.
- 00:01:24,459 --> 00:01:27,961 Hey, imagine if I'd never gotten fired off Days of Our Lives.
- 00:01:28,129 --> 00:01:30,464 Hey. Hey, there's Carol again.
- 00:01:31,925 --> 00:01:34,885 What if I had had the guts to quit my job?
- 00:01:35,053 --> 00:01:38,847 I'd probably be writing for The New Yorker, being paid to be funny.
- 00:01:39,099 --> 00:01:42,059 But my job's fun too. I mean, tomorrow...
- 00:01:42,310 --> 00:01:44,228 ...I don't have to wear a tie.
- 00:01:45,522 --> 00:01:47,856 What if I'd taken that job at Merrill Lynch?
- 00:01:48,024 --> 00:01:50,067 - What? - Merrill Lynch?
- 00:01:50,235 --> 00:01:54,571 A massage client who worked there said I had a knack for stocks.
- 00:01:54,739 --> 00:01:55,948 Why didn't you take it?
- 00:01:56,116 --> 00:01:59,743 At that time, you see, I thought that everything that rhymed was true.
- 00:01:59,911 --> 00:02:01,995 So I thought if I worked with stocks...
- 00:02:02,163 --> 00:02:06,583 ...I'd have to live in a box and only eat lox and have a pet fox.
- 00:02:08,128 --> 00:02:12,881 Do you think if all those things happened, we'd still hang out?
- 00:02:58,928 --> 00:03:00,596 Oh, my God. Rachel Green?
- 00:03:00,763 --> 00:03:02,973 Aah! Rob Tilman!
- 00:03:03,141 --> 00:03:06,351 No, heh, no, it's me. Ross.
- 00:03:06,519 --> 00:03:09,730 Oh, I'm sorry. Ross Tilman.
- 00:03:10,815 --> 00:03:15,694 - No. No, no. Ross Geller. - Of course! Monica's brother.
- 00:03:15,862 --> 00:03:18,530 - Yeah. Right. - Wow! How are you?
- 00:03:18,698 --> 00:03:23,118 - Good. Good, I'm married. - Oh! Me too! Ha, ha.
- 00:03:23,286 --> 00:03:26,580 - Isn't it the best? - Oh, it's the best. Heh.
- 00:03:26,748 --> 00:03:28,457 [BOTH SIGH]
- 00:03:29,250 --> 00:03:32,669 - So, um, how's Monica? - Really, really great.
- 00:03:32,837 --> 00:03:37,674 Actually, she's right down the street. Um, you should stop by and say hi.
- 00:03:37,842 --> 00:03:40,594 - Oh, I would love to. - Yeah, she'd be so excited.
- 00:03:40,762 --> 00:03:42,262 - Oh, okay. - Come on.
- 00:03:42,430 --> 00:03:44,181 Wait, don't you have to pay for...
- 00:03:44,349 --> 00:03:46,350 ...Busty Ladies?
- 00:03:48,853 --> 00:03:53,315 No, that's okay. Some kid asked me to pick it up for him, but I...
- 00:03:53,483 --> 00:03:55,400 [BOTH LAUGH]
- 00:04:01,824 --> 00:04:05,494 So, Monica, still going out with Dr. Boring, huh?
- 00:04:07,038 --> 00:04:09,748 He's not boring. He's just...
- 00:04:12,335 --> 00:04:14,086 He's just low-key.
- 00:04:14,254 --> 00:04:17,339 - Here you go, one hazelnut latte. - Thank you.
- 00:04:17,507 --> 00:04:21,176 You know, the hazelnut, actually not a nut.
- 00:04:21,344 --> 00:04:23,679 It's a seed.
- 00:04:24,138 --> 00:04:25,597 Wow.
- 00:04:26,474 --> 00:04:31,228 Can anyone else name a well-known seed that's been masquerading as a nut?
- 00:04:31,396 --> 00:04:34,064 Oh, dear God. Let me think.
- 00:04:35,483 --> 00:04:36,650 Hey.
- 00:04:37,193 --> 00:04:38,986 Oh, no. What's the matter?
- 00:04:39,153 --> 00:04:40,696 I got another rejection letter.
- 00:04:40,863 --> 00:04:44,449 They said my writing was funny, just not "Archie Comic funny."
- 00:04:45,952 --> 00:04:47,744 I gotta get back to the hospital.
- 00:04:47,912 --> 00:04:48,954 - All right. - Okay.
- 00:04:49,122 --> 00:04:50,622 - Bye. - Bye-bye.
- 00:04:50,999 --> 00:04:55,460 Oh, uh, by the way, the answer is the Brazil nut.
- 00:04:59,090 --> 00:05:01,925 Was his question, "What's more boring than him?"
- 00:05:02,552 --> 00:05:04,970 Hey, man. Sorry about that Archie thing.
- 00:05:05,138 --> 00:05:06,847 You, uh, need me to give you some money?
- 00:05:07,015 --> 00:05:10,225 Hey, I may have no money, but I still have my pride.
- 00:05:11,769 --> 00:05:12,811 Really?
- 00:05:14,689 --> 00:05:15,856 Eh.
- 00:05:17,275 --> 00:05:19,443 Joey doesn't have to give you money.
- 00:05:19,610 --> 00:05:22,529 - TV stars have assistants, right? - That's an idea.
- 00:05:22,697 --> 00:05:25,866 If I hire an assistant, would you take money from her?
- 00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:29,244 No, Joey. Chandler could be your assistant.
- 00:05:29,495 --> 00:05:31,663 He could answer your fan mail and stuff.
- 00:05:31,831 --> 00:05:33,498 That would be great! Let's do that!
- 00:05:33,666 --> 00:05:36,126 I could use the money. Give me time to write.
- 00:05:36,294 --> 00:05:38,086 - Great! Welcome aboard. - Okay!
- 00:05:38,254 --> 00:05:40,505 All right. I need to use the bathroom.
- 00:05:40,673 --> 00:05:43,675 Since I don't need assistance in there, take a break!
- 00:05:43,843 --> 00:05:45,218 All right.
- 00:05:47,430 --> 00:05:48,680 - Hey. MONICA: Hey, Phoebe.
- 00:05:48,848 --> 00:05:49,848 - Guess what? - What?
- 00:05:50,016 --> 00:05:51,600 Joey just hired Chandler.
- 00:05:51,768 --> 00:05:53,393 Oh, that's so sweet.
- 00:05:53,561 --> 00:05:54,728 [CELL PHONE RINGING]
- 00:05:54,896 --> 00:05:56,396 Oh! Hang on!
- 00:05:56,564 --> 00:05:58,899 Hang on!
- 00:06:01,194 --> 00:06:02,361 Go!
- 00:06:03,404 --> 00:06:06,448 No. No, no. I said sell when it hits 50!
- 00:06:06,699 --> 00:06:10,285 Five-oh! It's a number! It comes after four-nine!
- 00:06:10,995 --> 00:06:14,456 No, it's okay. It's okay. You're allowed one mistake.
- 00:06:14,707 --> 00:06:16,750 Just kidding. You are of course fired.
- 00:06:18,961 --> 00:06:20,379 Ugh.
- 00:06:20,546 --> 00:06:21,671 - Hey, Mon? - Hey.
- 00:06:21,839 --> 00:06:23,840 Mon, look who I ran into.
- 00:06:24,008 --> 00:06:25,092 [GASPS]
- 00:06:25,259 --> 00:06:26,635 Oh, my God, Rachel!
- 00:06:26,803 --> 00:06:28,845 [MONICA SQUEALS]
- 00:06:30,473 --> 00:06:33,392 - God, you look terrific! - Oh, so do you!
- 00:06:33,559 --> 00:06:34,893 Thanks.
- 00:06:35,061 --> 00:06:38,355 - Did you lose weight? - You are so sweet to notice.
- 00:06:38,523 --> 00:06:40,190 Yes, I lost 3 and a half pounds.
- 00:06:40,358 --> 00:06:41,566 Ah!
- 00:06:43,945 --> 00:06:46,822 - You remember my friend Chandler? - Hi.
- 00:06:46,989 --> 00:06:49,199 - And that's Phoebe. - Hi.
- 00:06:49,367 --> 00:06:52,994 Sit down. Sit down. How long's it been since we've seen each other?
- 00:06:53,162 --> 00:06:56,915 1987, the day after Christmas. Uh, Sean McMahan's party.
- 00:06:57,083 --> 00:07:01,628 I played you one of my songs. "Interplanetary Courtship Ritual."
- 00:07:03,131 --> 00:07:05,799 Oh, yeah. Right.
- 00:07:06,050 --> 00:07:09,344 - So, now, do you still do music? - Well, sometimes.
- 00:07:09,595 --> 00:07:12,180 - Sometime I'll play you... RACHEL: Oh, my God!
- 00:07:12,432 --> 00:07:17,727 Joey Tribbiani from Days of Our Lives just walked in here!
- 00:07:17,895 --> 00:07:22,774 - Rach, he's a friend of ours. - You are friends with Dr. Drake Ramoray?
- 00:07:24,569 --> 00:07:26,361 It's hard to be friends with Drake...
- 00:07:26,529 --> 00:07:30,282 ...because of his busy schedule and the fact that he's not real.
- 00:07:31,701 --> 00:07:35,203 Hey, or I could bring my keyboard here sometime.
- 00:07:35,455 --> 00:07:36,913 - He's coming over. - Joey?
- 00:07:37,123 --> 00:07:38,498 I know. Here, here.
- 00:07:38,791 --> 00:07:39,958 Oh.
- 00:07:40,668 --> 00:07:43,962 No. This is my friend Rachel. We went to high school together.
- 00:07:44,213 --> 00:07:45,797 - Ha, ha, hi. - Hi.
- 00:07:45,965 --> 00:07:48,049 I...
- 00:07:48,718 --> 00:07:50,719 I love you on that show.
- 00:07:50,887 --> 00:07:52,762 - Oh. - I watch you every day.
- 00:07:52,972 --> 00:07:55,974 When you took out your kidney to save your ex-wife...
- 00:07:56,225 --> 00:07:58,935 ...even though she tried to kill you...
- 00:07:59,729 --> 00:08:01,646 It's always nice to meet fans.
- 00:08:01,814 --> 00:08:02,898 [LAUGHS]
- 00:08:03,065 --> 00:08:05,192 - She's not crazy, is she? - No.
- 00:08:05,651 --> 00:08:08,737 So, uh, how you doing?
- 00:08:14,619 --> 00:08:16,203 [CELL PHONE RINGING]
- 00:08:16,370 --> 00:08:18,079 Hang on.
- 00:08:18,289 --> 00:08:21,666 Hang on. Hang on.
- 00:08:22,793 --> 00:08:23,835 Go!
- 00:08:24,170 --> 00:08:25,420 Who's this?
- 00:08:25,671 --> 00:08:27,714 Oh, you're gonna like working for me.
- 00:08:27,965 --> 00:08:31,801 What's your name? What kind of name is Brindy?
- 00:08:31,969 --> 00:08:33,678 I... Uh, whatever.
- 00:08:33,846 --> 00:08:35,555 Stop talking.
- 00:08:36,224 --> 00:08:38,975 All right, from now on your name is Joan.
- 00:08:39,435 --> 00:08:41,478 You can pick your own last name.
- 00:08:43,397 --> 00:08:46,066 - Hey, there you are. - Uh-oh, it's my boss.
- 00:08:46,234 --> 00:08:49,486 All right, here's a list of things for you to do today.
- 00:08:49,654 --> 00:08:51,947 This is gonna be so great. Thank you so much.
- 00:08:52,198 --> 00:08:56,368 I gotta go to work. I'm delivering twins, but only one of them is mine.
- 00:09:01,249 --> 00:09:05,252 "Drop off my dry cleaning. Pick up my vitamins."
- 00:09:05,920 --> 00:09:07,712 Teach me how to spell vitamins.
- 00:09:09,715 --> 00:09:11,800 "Wear in my new jeans."
- 00:09:13,594 --> 00:09:15,929 - You realize what you are, don't you? - What?
- 00:09:16,097 --> 00:09:17,722 You're his bitch.
- 00:09:19,225 --> 00:09:21,643 No, no! No!
- 00:09:21,978 --> 00:09:24,437 Wait! You didn't sit on my Kit Kats did you?
- 00:09:24,855 --> 00:09:28,066 No, there was a little, little dip in the market...
- 00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:30,277 ...and I lost $13 million.
- 00:09:30,444 --> 00:09:32,571 But the Kit Kats are all right?
- 00:09:33,489 --> 00:09:36,366 What am I gonna do? I can't call my office, they'll kill me.
- 00:09:36,617 --> 00:09:39,703 I can't call my clients, they'll kill themselves!
- 00:09:39,954 --> 00:09:42,455 - All right, now my chest hurts. - What?
- 00:09:42,623 --> 00:09:45,166 My chest hurts. Ugh.
- 00:09:45,334 --> 00:09:50,005 - Ugh! And now, I can't breathe. - Are you having a heart attack?
- 00:09:50,172 --> 00:09:53,842 If I were, would I have shooting pains up and down my left arm?
- 00:09:54,010 --> 00:09:56,970 - Yes. - Then, yes. That is what I'm having.
- 00:09:57,138 --> 00:09:58,847 Oh, my God!
- 00:10:04,186 --> 00:10:06,646 Come on, Pheebs, it's not that bad.
- 00:10:06,814 --> 00:10:10,066 Most people'd be excited if they didn't work for a couple weeks.
- 00:10:10,234 --> 00:10:13,278 Most people don't like their jobs. I love my job.
- 00:10:13,529 --> 00:10:17,616 I've been not working for three hours, and I'm already going crazy.
- 00:10:17,825 --> 00:10:19,409 I miss Joan.
- 00:10:20,745 --> 00:10:24,331 Honey, a heart attack is nature's way of telling you to slow down.
- 00:10:24,582 --> 00:10:28,418 I always thought it was nature's way of telling you to die. Heh.
- 00:10:30,004 --> 00:10:31,421 You're not gonna die.
- 00:10:31,672 --> 00:10:35,967 I mean, you are going to die, but you're not gonna die today.
- 00:10:36,218 --> 00:10:37,427 I wish I was dead.
- 00:10:39,221 --> 00:10:40,347 Let's take a walk.
- 00:10:40,556 --> 00:10:44,309 You should consider writing for Talking Out of Your Ass magazine.
- 00:10:48,064 --> 00:10:49,564 So what's going on with you?
- 00:10:50,149 --> 00:10:54,944 Well, um, I've been doing a lot more of my karate.
- 00:10:56,656 --> 00:10:58,907 - Still a dry spell with Carol? - Yeah.
- 00:10:59,116 --> 00:11:01,618 How long has it been since you've had sex?
- 00:11:01,786 --> 00:11:04,913 - Well, last weekend... - That's not so bad.
- 00:11:05,081 --> 00:11:07,874 ...will be two months...
- 00:11:08,250 --> 00:11:11,002 ...since I stopped trying.
- 00:11:12,296 --> 00:11:14,005 You need to spice things up.
- 00:11:14,173 --> 00:11:15,715 - What do you mean? - I don't know.
- 00:11:15,883 --> 00:11:19,219 You could tie her up. You could eat stuff off each other.
- 00:11:19,387 --> 00:11:20,512 Oh.
- 00:11:20,680 --> 00:11:24,349 - Dirty talk, ménage à trois, toys. - Wow.
- 00:11:25,267 --> 00:11:27,727 Role-playing. You're warden, she's prisoner.
- 00:11:27,978 --> 00:11:31,481 - You're the pirate, she's the wench. - Okay, I think I got it.
- 00:11:31,649 --> 00:11:35,527 You could be two stockbrokers, rolling naked on the trading floor...
- 00:11:35,778 --> 00:11:37,779 ...and everybody's watching.
- 00:11:39,448 --> 00:11:41,157 It never happened.
- 00:11:47,039 --> 00:11:48,957 And over there is Brady's Pub...
- 00:11:49,166 --> 00:11:52,127 ...where I unwind after a long day of "surgeoning."
- 00:11:52,378 --> 00:11:55,046 Wow! This is so amazing. What else?
- 00:11:55,297 --> 00:11:58,341 Well, that is a large piece of television equipment.
- 00:11:58,551 --> 00:12:00,260 And, uh, that is an old man.
- 00:12:00,511 --> 00:12:02,095 - Hey, old man! - Hey.
- 00:12:02,304 --> 00:12:05,557 Alrighty. What do you say we head back to my place?
- 00:12:05,725 --> 00:12:11,312 Well, wow. Um, you know, I would really love to, but I shouldn't.
- 00:12:11,480 --> 00:12:15,817 Why? Why can't the world stop turning?
- 00:12:16,944 --> 00:12:20,029 Just for a moment. Just for us.
- 00:12:21,824 --> 00:12:23,324 Isn't that a line from the show?
- 00:12:24,660 --> 00:12:27,579 Uh, yeah, but, uh...
- 00:12:27,747 --> 00:12:30,749 ...I may have said those things before, but...
- 00:12:30,916 --> 00:12:35,211 ...I never truly meant them until now.
- 00:12:36,630 --> 00:12:38,298 That's a line from the show too!
- 00:12:39,508 --> 00:12:41,092 Okay, you watch too much TV.
- 00:12:41,927 --> 00:12:44,679 Joe, here's the freshly-squeezed orange juice you asked for.
- 00:12:44,847 --> 00:12:46,055 - Thanks. - Hi.
- 00:12:47,224 --> 00:12:48,558 Yeah, there's pulp in that.
- 00:12:51,270 --> 00:12:52,854 - Yeah? - Heh.
- 00:12:53,481 --> 00:12:56,649 I thought we talked about this. I don't like pulp.
- 00:12:56,817 --> 00:13:00,278 No pulp. Pulp isn't juice. All juice. Okay?
- 00:13:00,446 --> 00:13:03,573 I'm sorry. I guess I just like the pulp.
- 00:13:04,867 --> 00:13:07,285 God, I'm sorry. I am being so rude.
- 00:13:07,453 --> 00:13:10,121 Rachel, would you like a soda or something?
- 00:13:10,372 --> 00:13:14,167 Because Chandler will run right out and get it.
- 00:13:14,627 --> 00:13:17,295 Yeah, well, sure, iced tea would be great.
- 00:13:17,505 --> 00:13:18,755 Iced tea.
- 00:13:21,759 --> 00:13:24,302 Okay. Anything for you, sir?
- 00:13:25,054 --> 00:13:26,971 Did I not just tell him?
- 00:13:28,724 --> 00:13:31,392 Okay, look, Chandler, if this is gonna work...
- 00:13:31,644 --> 00:13:35,396 ...you have got to listen.
- 00:13:38,234 --> 00:13:41,152 You're gonna throw that juice at me, aren't you?
- 00:13:41,320 --> 00:13:42,654 It's not all juice.
- 00:13:48,744 --> 00:13:50,620 Honey, this morning was fun, huh?
- 00:13:50,788 --> 00:13:54,457 Me hopping in on you in the shower there?
- 00:13:54,625 --> 00:13:58,336 Yeah, maybe someday we could get a place with two bathrooms.
- 00:14:01,841 --> 00:14:05,510 Look, Carol, um, I was thinking maybe...
- 00:14:05,719 --> 00:14:08,596 ...maybe we can spice things up a little.
- 00:14:08,848 --> 00:14:12,100 - What do you mean? - Carol, our sex life. It's just not...
- 00:14:12,309 --> 00:14:15,854 - Dad! - Hey there, little fella!
- 00:14:16,021 --> 00:14:17,981 Hey, why don't we get some shoes on you?
- 00:14:18,148 --> 00:14:21,276 Show Dad how you put your shoes on in your room.
- 00:14:21,485 --> 00:14:23,444 - Yay! - Yay!
- 00:14:24,029 --> 00:14:25,113 Yay!
- 00:14:25,698 --> 00:14:27,824 Seriously, our sex life.
- 00:14:28,868 --> 00:14:31,160 I was thinking maybe, I don't know...
- 00:14:31,328 --> 00:14:34,205 ...we could try some new things, you know, for fun.
- 00:14:34,373 --> 00:14:38,042 - Like what? - Well, I don't know. Um...
- 00:14:39,753 --> 00:14:42,213 What if we, uh, were to...
- 00:14:43,132 --> 00:14:45,133 ...tie each other up?
- 00:14:47,428 --> 00:14:48,845 [COUGHS]
- 00:14:52,224 --> 00:14:56,728 Um, some people eat stuff off one another.
- 00:14:58,355 --> 00:14:59,981 Yeah.
- 00:15:00,232 --> 00:15:04,402 Um, you know, we could try dirty talk. Uh, heh.
- 00:15:05,821 --> 00:15:09,949 - Um, we could have a threesome. - I love that idea!
- 00:15:13,329 --> 00:15:15,079 Who sold a story to Archie Comics?
- 00:15:15,247 --> 00:15:18,583 Oh, my God, that's so great. Oh, wow!
- 00:15:19,209 --> 00:15:22,086 You're a published writer. I wish I had a present.
- 00:15:22,254 --> 00:15:23,963 - Aw. - Wait a minute.
- 00:15:26,383 --> 00:15:28,509 My last Kit Kat bar.
- 00:15:33,140 --> 00:15:35,391 - You want to share it? - Okay!
- 00:15:37,519 --> 00:15:38,978 - Hey. - Hey.
- 00:15:39,229 --> 00:15:41,898 Chandler, I know you're mad. I'm sorry.
- 00:15:42,149 --> 00:15:46,653 I was a total jerk. Completely over the line.
- 00:15:46,862 --> 00:15:48,905 I just... I hate pulp.
- 00:15:50,491 --> 00:15:53,034 You know how Monica feels about low-fat mayonnaise?
- 00:15:53,202 --> 00:15:55,495 It's not mayonnaise!
- 00:15:56,538 --> 00:16:01,668 Okay, uh, anyway, I just wanted to say I'm sorry, and here.
- 00:16:02,044 --> 00:16:05,672 - What's this? - Fresh-squeezed orange juice, with pulp.
- 00:16:05,839 --> 00:16:09,384 - Just the way you like. - Aw, thanks, man.
- 00:16:12,805 --> 00:16:16,099 Hey, Joey? Chandler sold a story to Archie Comics.
- 00:16:16,266 --> 00:16:19,519 Oh, my God, that's great! Congratulations! What's the story?
- 00:16:19,687 --> 00:16:23,022 Oh, you wouldn't care. It's just a stupid comic book story.
- 00:16:23,190 --> 00:16:26,776 Are you kidding me? I love Archie and the whole gang.
- 00:16:28,946 --> 00:16:33,574 Well, um, Archie needs money to fix his jalopy.
- 00:16:37,204 --> 00:16:40,790 Uh, but he doesn't want Reggie to just give him the money.
- 00:16:41,041 --> 00:16:43,668 So Reggie hires him as his assist...
- 00:16:45,921 --> 00:16:47,755 As his butler.
- 00:16:48,465 --> 00:16:50,174 And makes him do crazy things...
- 00:16:50,426 --> 00:16:53,803 ...like bring him milk shakes that can't have lumps.
- 00:16:55,764 --> 00:16:59,100 Wait a minute. That sounds a little familiar.
- 00:17:01,145 --> 00:17:03,604 Did they already do that? I think I read it!
- 00:17:08,068 --> 00:17:10,611 Monica, listen. I have to ask.
- 00:17:10,863 --> 00:17:15,074 Okay, Joey Tribbiani invited me back to his apartment.
- 00:17:15,284 --> 00:17:20,288 - Does he do this with a lot of girls? - Yeah, a lot. A lot, a lot.
- 00:17:20,456 --> 00:17:22,123 Ah! And I'm one of them.
- 00:17:23,167 --> 00:17:24,751 Wow.
- 00:17:24,918 --> 00:17:29,464 I just cannot believe this. I mean, Joey Tribbiani.
- 00:17:29,715 --> 00:17:32,091 It's none of my business, but aren't you married?
- 00:17:32,342 --> 00:17:33,634 Yeah.
- 00:17:36,013 --> 00:17:39,098 I wish we could just not be married for a little bit.
- 00:17:39,349 --> 00:17:43,227 You know, I just wish we could be, like, on a break.
- 00:17:46,732 --> 00:17:48,107 Well, you're not.
- 00:17:48,317 --> 00:17:51,819 It's easy for you. You get to have sex with whoever you want.
- 00:17:52,071 --> 00:17:53,654 Yeah, I can. Ha.
- 00:17:55,074 --> 00:17:56,616 Don't think I don't. I do.
- 00:17:56,867 --> 00:17:58,868 I mean, all the time. You bet!
- 00:18:01,205 --> 00:18:03,247 - Monica? - Hmm?
- 00:18:04,166 --> 00:18:06,542 You've done it, right?
- 00:18:06,919 --> 00:18:08,336 [LAUGHS]
- 00:18:08,504 --> 00:18:13,466 Of course I have. What do you think, I'm like some 30-year-old virgin?
- 00:18:13,634 --> 00:18:17,053 Oh, my God. You're a 30-year-old virgin.
- 00:18:19,181 --> 00:18:21,516 Louder. I don't think the guy in the back heard.
- 00:18:21,725 --> 00:18:23,476 GUY: Yeah, I heard it.
- 00:18:25,979 --> 00:18:28,689 It's not like I haven't had the opportunity.
- 00:18:28,899 --> 00:18:30,983 - I'm waiting for the perfect guy. - Mm-hm.
- 00:18:31,401 --> 00:18:33,861 I'm seeing this guy Roger. He's not perfect...
- 00:18:34,029 --> 00:18:36,656 ...but, uh, I'm thinking maybe I should get it over with.
- 00:18:36,907 --> 00:18:38,908 You know, give him my flower.
- 00:18:40,661 --> 00:18:46,374 Oh, my God, do it! Honey, you've waited long enough.
- 00:18:46,583 --> 00:18:51,212 - You know what? You are right. - Sex does not have to be a big deal.
- 00:18:51,421 --> 00:18:54,340 There shouldn't be all these rules and restrictions.
- 00:18:54,550 --> 00:18:57,677 People should be able to sleep with whoever, whenever...
- 00:18:57,928 --> 00:19:01,556 Rachel. I'm never gonna think it's okay for you to cheat on your husband.
- 00:19:01,723 --> 00:19:03,516 Oh, what do you know, virgin?
- 00:19:10,065 --> 00:19:11,232 Phoebe?
- 00:19:11,441 --> 00:19:14,443 Why is smoke coming out of the bathroom?
- 00:19:14,611 --> 00:19:18,406 PHOEBE: Oh, yeah. The doctor said that could be one of the side effects.
- 00:19:20,159 --> 00:19:21,284 Put the cigarette out.
- 00:19:21,451 --> 00:19:25,538 PHOEBE: No, it's not a cigarette. The smoke is coming out of me!
- 00:19:25,706 --> 00:19:28,749 - Put it out. PHOEBE: Okay, okay!
- 00:19:31,086 --> 00:19:34,130 - I'm so glad you're here. - Come on.
- 00:19:34,298 --> 00:19:35,506 [CELL PHONE RINGS]
- 00:19:35,674 --> 00:19:37,717 - I got it. I got it. - Give it to me! Give it!
- 00:19:37,885 --> 00:19:39,635 [YELLS]
- 00:19:43,098 --> 00:19:44,390 Hello?
- 00:19:45,100 --> 00:19:46,976 No, she can't come to the phone now.
- 00:19:47,686 --> 00:19:50,688 Oh, right. No problem. Okay, bye-bye.
- 00:19:50,856 --> 00:19:53,357 Was it work? Were they mad? Was it Jack? Did he yell?
- 00:19:53,525 --> 00:19:56,027 No, just relax. Nobody yelled.
- 00:19:56,195 --> 00:19:58,946 Jack was making sure you were getting better.
- 00:19:59,114 --> 00:20:00,656 Thank God.
- 00:20:01,158 --> 00:20:02,575 Yeah, she's fired.
- 00:20:06,830 --> 00:20:09,081 You've done all you can, Dr. Wesley.
- 00:20:09,249 --> 00:20:11,292 You've got to let her go.
- 00:20:12,502 --> 00:20:15,046 Goodbye and Godspeed, Hope Brady.
- 00:20:16,465 --> 00:20:18,257 Not so fast, Wesley.
- 00:20:20,052 --> 00:20:23,763 - Ramoray. - That's right, Wesley.
- 00:20:23,931 --> 00:20:28,643 I just stopped by to say that you're not a real doctor.
- 00:20:28,810 --> 00:20:32,188 And that woman's brain is fine.
- 00:20:32,356 --> 00:20:35,066 Oh, thank God. Oh, thank God.
- 00:20:42,658 --> 00:20:46,786 - Hope? Hope? - Drake.
- 00:20:47,037 --> 00:20:48,371 You're not dying, Hope.
- 00:20:48,538 --> 00:20:52,583 You're gonna live a long, healthy life. With me.
- 00:20:52,751 --> 00:20:54,377 Oh, Drake.
- 00:20:59,216 --> 00:21:00,716 Okay.
- 00:21:00,884 --> 00:21:02,385 Here we go.
- 00:21:03,637 --> 00:21:05,429 Okay. Ahem.
- 00:21:05,597 --> 00:21:07,515 Mm.
- 00:21:08,392 --> 00:21:11,477 Hi, Joey? It's Rachel.
- 00:21:11,645 --> 00:21:14,897 Um, I am free tomorrow night.
- 00:21:16,525 --> 00:21:19,568 Yeah, sure, sure I can bring some sandwiches.
- 00:21:24,283 --> 00:21:27,285 [DANCE MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO]
- 00:21:53,645 --> 00:21:55,646 [English - US - SDH]
Скриншоты


























