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Эпизод с сестрой Рэйчел
The One with Rachel's Sister
Сезон: 06Серия: 13
Описание
Джои использует своё положение официанта, чтобы бесплатно угощать всех симпатичных клиенток в кофейне, но быстро попадает в неприятности с Гюнтером. Моника отказывается признать, что больна, когда простужается. Сестра Рэйчел, Джилл (Риз Уизерспун), появляется после того, как их отец прекращает её финансовую поддержку, и теперь Рэйчел приходится справляться со всем самостоятельно.
Субтитры
- 00:00:02,460 --> 00:00:05,295 Okay, Rach, that's muffin and espresso, 4.50.
- 00:00:05,463 --> 00:00:10,009 Ross, double latte, 2.75. Chandler, coffee and a scone, 4.25.
- 00:00:10,176 --> 00:00:11,885 And, Pheebs, herbal tea, 1.25.
- 00:00:12,053 --> 00:00:15,597 So all together that's 12.75.
- 00:00:15,765 --> 00:00:20,227 This coming from the man who couldn't split our $80 phone bill in half.
- 00:00:20,729 --> 00:00:21,895 - Hi. - Hi.
- 00:00:22,063 --> 00:00:23,772 How much do I owe?
- 00:00:23,940 --> 00:00:27,109 Oh, that's on the house, courtesy of Joey Tribbiani.
- 00:00:27,318 --> 00:00:30,237 Oh. Great. Well, tell him thanks.
- 00:00:30,405 --> 00:00:35,284 And since Joey seems like such a nice guy, maybe we could go on a date sometime?
- 00:00:35,452 --> 00:00:37,995 Well, he's not used to women being so forward...
- 00:00:38,163 --> 00:00:41,081 ...but I could check with him. He says it's okay.
- 00:00:41,291 --> 00:00:42,624 [CHUCKLES]
- 00:00:43,334 --> 00:00:45,252 Great. Thanks. Bye-bye.
- 00:00:45,462 --> 00:00:47,796 Hey, Joey, how come our stuff isn't free?
- 00:00:47,964 --> 00:00:51,216 It will be when you look like that in a tight skirt.
- 00:00:51,426 --> 00:00:53,802 This is great. I'm getting more dates than ever.
- 00:00:53,970 --> 00:00:56,805 Wait, you're only giving away free stuff to the pretty girls?
- 00:00:56,973 --> 00:00:59,099 Joey, that is so gross.
- 00:00:59,309 --> 00:01:02,186 Hmm. How about a scone on the house, baby?
- 00:01:04,189 --> 00:01:05,355 I'm pretty.
- 00:01:47,565 --> 00:01:50,651 - Hey, does anyone have any gum? - Oh, I do.
- 00:01:53,113 --> 00:01:54,822 Here. Sorry.
- 00:01:55,657 --> 00:01:57,741 Oh, you know what?
- 00:02:00,245 --> 00:02:01,703 No.
- 00:02:02,956 --> 00:02:04,832 Wait a second.
- 00:02:10,296 --> 00:02:13,590 - I know it's in here somewhere. - You know what? I'm good. I'm good.
- 00:02:14,092 --> 00:02:15,134 - Hey. ROSS: Hey.
- 00:02:15,301 --> 00:02:17,719 What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be at work?
- 00:02:17,887 --> 00:02:21,014 [IN CONGESTED VOICE] They sent me home. They said I can't work if I'm sick.
- 00:02:21,224 --> 00:02:22,349 ALL: Aw.
- 00:02:22,517 --> 00:02:25,477 - I'm so sorry that you're sick. - I'm not sick.
- 00:02:26,521 --> 00:02:27,563 I don't get sick.
- 00:02:27,730 --> 00:02:31,024 Getting sick is for weaklings. It's for pansies.
- 00:02:32,026 --> 00:02:34,194 Honey, no one thinks that you're a pansy.
- 00:02:34,362 --> 00:02:37,197 But we do think that you need a tissue.
- 00:02:40,201 --> 00:02:42,327 I have not been sick in over three years.
- 00:02:42,495 --> 00:02:43,579 [SNEEZES]
- 00:02:45,039 --> 00:02:49,543 - I'm gonna grab you some tissue. - I don't need a tissue. I'm fine.
- 00:02:49,711 --> 00:02:54,631 When you put a D at the end of "fine," you're not fine.
- 00:02:55,925 --> 00:03:00,804 I'm fine.
- 00:03:01,514 --> 00:03:04,224 You know, it's a really hard word to say.
- 00:03:04,392 --> 00:03:06,018 [KNOCKING ON DOOR]
- 00:03:16,779 --> 00:03:19,948 CHANDLER: Yes? - Hi. Is Rachel here? I'm her sister.
- 00:03:20,116 --> 00:03:22,784 - Oh, my God, Jill. - Oh, my God, Rachel.
- 00:03:22,952 --> 00:03:24,244 Oh!
- 00:03:24,412 --> 00:03:26,538 Oh, my God, introduce us.
- 00:03:27,123 --> 00:03:28,707 - This is Chandler. - Hi.
- 00:03:28,875 --> 00:03:30,250 And you know Monica and Ross.
- 00:03:30,460 --> 00:03:32,753 JILL: Hi. - And that's Phoebe, and that's Joey.
- 00:03:32,962 --> 00:03:34,755 - Hey. How you doing? - Don't.
- 00:03:40,178 --> 00:03:42,304 - Honey, what are you doing here? JILL: Oh.
- 00:03:42,472 --> 00:03:43,639 Which sister is this?
- 00:03:43,806 --> 00:03:46,850 Is this the spoiled one or the one that bit her?
- 00:03:47,018 --> 00:03:50,479 - Daddy cut me off. - Never mind, I got it.
- 00:03:50,647 --> 00:03:52,147 And you know what I said to him?
- 00:03:52,315 --> 00:03:55,567 I said, "I'm gonna hire a lawyer, sue you and take all your money...
- 00:03:55,735 --> 00:03:57,361 ...and then I'm gonna cut you off."
- 00:03:58,029 --> 00:04:01,031 - What did he say? - He said he wouldn't pay for my lawyer.
- 00:04:01,241 --> 00:04:02,366 Ah.
- 00:04:02,533 --> 00:04:05,077 Then he told me to come and learn the value of money...
- 00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:06,870 ...from the one daughter he's proud of.
- 00:04:07,038 --> 00:04:08,455 Oh.
- 00:04:09,624 --> 00:04:14,086 Did you hear that? My dad's proud of me. My dad's proud of me. Ha, ha.
- 00:04:14,879 --> 00:04:16,630 - Rach? - Oh, yeah, sorry.
- 00:04:16,798 --> 00:04:20,175 Hey, honey, so, what did you do that made Dad cut you off?
- 00:04:21,177 --> 00:04:24,304 - Okay, I bought a boat. - You bought a boat?
- 00:04:25,014 --> 00:04:28,225 Yeah, but it wasn't for me, it was for a friend.
- 00:04:28,393 --> 00:04:30,852 Boy, did we make friends with the wrong sister.
- 00:04:33,189 --> 00:04:36,566 Jill, I think this is the best thing that could've ever happened to you.
- 00:04:36,734 --> 00:04:38,860 You've needed to get out on your own anyway.
- 00:04:39,028 --> 00:04:41,613 And you know, when I did it, at first I was scared...
- 00:04:41,781 --> 00:04:43,073 ...but then look at me now.
- 00:04:43,241 --> 00:04:46,576 I am the only daughter that Dad is proud of.
- 00:04:47,745 --> 00:04:50,747 Okay, well, this is what you're gonna do. You're gonna get a job.
- 00:04:51,499 --> 00:04:53,750 You're gonna get an apartment. And I'll help you.
- 00:04:53,918 --> 00:04:56,545 You can stay with us. Right? She can stay with us?
- 00:04:56,713 --> 00:04:59,298 - Of course, yeah. - Oh, that's so great.
- 00:04:59,465 --> 00:05:03,135 Okay, I'm really gonna do this. I don't know how to thank you guys.
- 00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:05,512 Aw. I like cars.
- 00:05:11,811 --> 00:05:13,228 - You all finished here? - Yes.
- 00:05:13,396 --> 00:05:14,980 Great.
- 00:05:18,735 --> 00:05:21,278 - Okay, here are the tips for this morning. JOEY: Mm.
- 00:05:21,446 --> 00:05:25,449 Jen gets 50, 50 for me, and Joey owes $8.
- 00:05:26,868 --> 00:05:29,328 - What? - For all the free food you gave away.
- 00:05:29,495 --> 00:05:32,289 Well, if it's free food, how come you're charging me for it?
- 00:05:33,624 --> 00:05:36,460 We don't give anything away unless it's someone's birthday.
- 00:05:36,669 --> 00:05:40,297 Oh. What if they came in third in a modeling contest?
- 00:05:41,341 --> 00:05:44,634 - No. - Oh. Sorry.
- 00:05:47,722 --> 00:05:51,350 I just had the hardest day. Some of these are so heavy.
- 00:05:52,435 --> 00:05:55,979 Jill, how did you pay for all this? I thought your dad took your credit card.
- 00:05:56,147 --> 00:05:58,690 Oh, please, I memorized those numbers when I was 15.
- 00:05:58,900 --> 00:06:00,025 [JILL CHUCKLES]
- 00:06:00,193 --> 00:06:03,111 But look at all the cool make-it-on-my-own stuff I got.
- 00:06:03,279 --> 00:06:06,281 This is my "Please hire me" sweater.
- 00:06:06,449 --> 00:06:10,577 And these are my "Don't you want to rent me this apartment?" pants.
- 00:06:11,579 --> 00:06:16,500 I don't think charging clothes to your dad qualifies as making it on your own.
- 00:06:16,667 --> 00:06:20,170 Oh, Mr. Scientist has to get all technical.
- 00:06:20,755 --> 00:06:23,298 I don't think Rachel's gonna think it's a good idea.
- 00:06:23,466 --> 00:06:27,636 - So who made her queen of the world? - I would love that job.
- 00:06:29,055 --> 00:06:31,390 - Hey. What's going on? - Hey.
- 00:06:31,557 --> 00:06:33,850 Jill.
- 00:06:34,060 --> 00:06:35,560 Did you shop?
- 00:06:36,354 --> 00:06:37,813 No.
- 00:06:37,980 --> 00:06:39,189 They did.
- 00:06:40,775 --> 00:06:43,443 - Yeah, we went shopping. - Yeah, we went shopping. Yeah.
- 00:06:45,029 --> 00:06:46,530 You went shopping?
- 00:06:46,697 --> 00:06:49,616 Then you came in here and paraded it right under Jill's nose...
- 00:06:49,784 --> 00:06:51,284 ...when you know she's trying to quit.
- 00:06:51,452 --> 00:06:53,787 Wow. You guys, that's terrible.
- 00:06:53,955 --> 00:06:55,372 - Sorry, Jill. - Sorry, Jill.
- 00:06:55,581 --> 00:06:57,082 It's okay.
- 00:06:57,708 --> 00:07:00,919 - So, what did you get? - Oh, well, all right. I got... Thank you.
- 00:07:01,087 --> 00:07:04,756 I got, um, this, you know, "I want a job" sweater.
- 00:07:04,924 --> 00:07:06,383 RACHEL: Oh.
- 00:07:07,385 --> 00:07:11,888 And then I got, uh... These are apartment pants.
- 00:07:13,641 --> 00:07:14,850 Apartment pants?
- 00:07:16,227 --> 00:07:17,769 Yeah, you've never heard of them?
- 00:07:18,729 --> 00:07:20,772 No, of course. Of course I've heard of them.
- 00:07:22,191 --> 00:07:23,942 - Ross, what did you get? - Huh?
- 00:07:24,110 --> 00:07:27,404 I got this...
- 00:07:27,572 --> 00:07:29,281 This.
- 00:07:31,075 --> 00:07:34,244 - A pashmina? - Yeah.
- 00:07:35,663 --> 00:07:38,457 Oh, I love these babies.
- 00:07:41,919 --> 00:07:43,545 - Really? ROSS: Mm-hm.
- 00:07:43,713 --> 00:07:45,088 Ross, what's a pashmina?
- 00:07:46,591 --> 00:07:48,425 It's a rug.
- 00:07:50,094 --> 00:07:51,511 Jill?
- 00:07:51,679 --> 00:07:52,888 [SOBBING]
- 00:07:53,055 --> 00:07:55,098 I'm sorry, Rachel.
- 00:07:55,558 --> 00:07:58,059 Oh, come on, you really think that's gonna work on me?
- 00:07:58,227 --> 00:08:00,187 I invented that.
- 00:08:00,396 --> 00:08:03,523 Oh, right. But I am sorry.
- 00:08:04,525 --> 00:08:07,360 All right, it's okay. One little setback is okay.
- 00:08:07,528 --> 00:08:10,822 - But don't let it happen again, all right? - Okay.
- 00:08:10,990 --> 00:08:15,327 Now, since Daddy paid for all this stuff, I should take it all away.
- 00:08:15,495 --> 00:08:18,788 But I'm just gonna take the pashmina.
- 00:08:21,083 --> 00:08:23,668 And the pants.
- 00:08:23,836 --> 00:08:27,797 You know what? I'm just gonna take it all, because that way, you'll learn the lesson.
- 00:08:28,549 --> 00:08:30,050 Alrighty.
- 00:08:30,218 --> 00:08:34,179 I'm gonna run a couple of errands, and I will see you at dinner.
- 00:08:34,347 --> 00:08:35,680 [JILL SIGHS]
- 00:08:37,225 --> 00:08:39,226 She took all my stuff.
- 00:08:39,393 --> 00:08:43,271 Yeah. Everything but the little blue one.
- 00:08:43,439 --> 00:08:44,481 [GASPS]
- 00:08:44,649 --> 00:08:45,690 That's the best one.
- 00:08:45,858 --> 00:08:50,820 - Oh, my God. Thank you so much. - Oh. Well, hey.
- 00:08:50,988 --> 00:08:54,741 Oh, my gosh, that was so lame. Like a pashmina could be a rug.
- 00:08:54,909 --> 00:08:56,409 Oh, yeah? Well, how about you with the:
- 00:08:56,577 --> 00:08:57,619 [SOBS]
- 00:08:57,787 --> 00:09:00,580 - [IN FALSETTO VOICE] "I'm sorry." - Shut up. I wasn't like that at all.
- 00:09:01,040 --> 00:09:03,792 What about what I said, you know, about the apartment pants?
- 00:09:03,960 --> 00:09:05,544 How dumb was I?
- 00:09:08,839 --> 00:09:11,841 - Were you this cute in high school? - [IN NORMAL VOICE] Oh, stop.
- 00:09:12,009 --> 00:09:14,177 - No, you stop. - No, you stop.
- 00:09:14,345 --> 00:09:15,387 You stop.
- 00:09:15,555 --> 00:09:18,890 Okay, why don't I sit here and then you'll both stop it?
- 00:09:21,394 --> 00:09:25,897 Okay, so, what do you wanna do? Let's do something crazy.
- 00:09:26,107 --> 00:09:29,192 I know, let's rest and drink lots of fluids.
- 00:09:30,194 --> 00:09:31,653 Okay, I'll rest.
- 00:09:31,821 --> 00:09:36,366 But, you know, if I'm going to bed, then you're coming with me.
- 00:09:36,576 --> 00:09:37,909 [MONICA SNIFFS]
- 00:09:38,077 --> 00:09:42,956 See, that would be impossible to resist if you weren't all drippy here.
- 00:09:45,418 --> 00:09:49,713 Are you saying that you don't wanna get with this?
- 00:09:54,218 --> 00:09:57,512 Yeah, I don't think you should say that even when you're healthy.
- 00:09:59,390 --> 00:10:01,641 Oh. Come on.
- 00:10:01,809 --> 00:10:04,060 [MONICA COUGHING]
- 00:10:04,228 --> 00:10:05,812 Don't take this personally, okay?
- 00:10:05,980 --> 00:10:09,024 It's just that I just can't have sex with a sick person.
- 00:10:09,817 --> 00:10:11,192 I'm with you, Chandler.
- 00:10:11,360 --> 00:10:14,362 I can't have sex with a sick person either. That's disgusting.
- 00:10:14,530 --> 00:10:17,073 But I'm not sick. Let me prove it to you.
- 00:10:19,160 --> 00:10:23,622 We are two healthy people in the prime of life.
- 00:10:24,999 --> 00:10:27,083 See, that's the thing. I would like to stay in...
- 00:10:27,251 --> 00:10:29,502 [IN CONGESTED VOICE] ...the prime of life.
- 00:10:32,506 --> 00:10:33,715 Hey.
- 00:10:33,883 --> 00:10:35,216 - Hey. - What's up?
- 00:10:35,384 --> 00:10:38,595 Um, I think there's something you should maybe know.
- 00:10:38,763 --> 00:10:40,805 It better not be about the apartment pants...
- 00:10:40,973 --> 00:10:46,061 ...because I just pitched the idea to my boss at Ralph Lauren, and she loved it.
- 00:10:46,270 --> 00:10:48,855 No, no. It's just, I was, um...
- 00:10:49,023 --> 00:10:51,066 I was with Ross and Jill after you left...
- 00:10:51,233 --> 00:10:54,694 ...and I'm pretty sure I saw a little spark between them.
- 00:10:55,279 --> 00:10:57,822 - What? - Yeah, I mean, it's probably nothing.
- 00:10:57,990 --> 00:11:01,368 But I just wanted to warn you that there might be something there.
- 00:11:01,535 --> 00:11:03,536 - With Ross and Jill? - Yeah.
- 00:11:04,121 --> 00:11:06,039 With Ross and my sister?
- 00:11:07,792 --> 00:11:08,833 Yeah.
- 00:11:09,001 --> 00:11:12,337 With my sister Jill and my ex-boyfriend Ross?
- 00:11:12,672 --> 00:11:13,713 Yeah.
- 00:11:13,881 --> 00:11:16,591 - Oh, there is no way. - Okay, then.
- 00:11:16,759 --> 00:11:19,678 Oh, my God. I cannot believe that.
- 00:11:20,179 --> 00:11:23,348 I don't really like it when Ross goes out with anyone, but my sister?
- 00:11:23,516 --> 00:11:25,475 Isn't that like incest or something?
- 00:11:26,977 --> 00:11:32,023 Oh, my God, and they're gonna have sex. Oh, no. What if he marries her too?
- 00:11:32,191 --> 00:11:34,818 Oh, this is just terrible. This is just terrible.
- 00:11:35,027 --> 00:11:37,320 And I can't stop it. I don't own Ross, you know?
- 00:11:37,488 --> 00:11:40,615 And Jill, she should be able to do whatever it is she wants to do.
- 00:11:40,783 --> 00:11:43,618 Oh, my God, I can't believe Ross is marrying my little sister.
- 00:11:43,786 --> 00:11:44,828 This is just...
- 00:11:44,995 --> 00:11:49,290 Oh, my God, this is just the worst thing that could've ever happened to me.
- 00:11:49,834 --> 00:11:52,836 But great news about the apartment pants, huh?
- 00:11:55,005 --> 00:11:56,798 That'll be 3.85.
- 00:11:56,966 --> 00:11:59,884 What do you mean? Yesterday you said I was too pretty to pay.
- 00:12:00,094 --> 00:12:03,847 It's just I can't, because my manager said that I...
- 00:12:05,224 --> 00:12:08,476 [SINGING] Happy birthday to you
- 00:12:08,644 --> 00:12:10,937 Happy birthday to you
- 00:12:11,105 --> 00:12:14,149 - Happy birthday, dear Annie... - Amy.
- 00:12:14,316 --> 00:12:16,484 Amy
- 00:12:16,652 --> 00:12:18,653 Happy birthday to you
- 00:12:18,821 --> 00:12:22,157 - Hey. - Hey, that's weird, today's my birthday too.
- 00:12:22,324 --> 00:12:24,409 Yeah, not in here it isn't.
- 00:12:27,663 --> 00:12:29,497 Sorry I'm late. What's up?
- 00:12:29,665 --> 00:12:31,583 Oh, hey. Uh...
- 00:12:31,751 --> 00:12:36,045 You know, I just wanted to see if there were any leads on the old job front.
- 00:12:36,213 --> 00:12:39,257 Oh. No. But I just walked past three sales and I didn't go in.
- 00:12:39,425 --> 00:12:41,301 - How strong am I? - Oh.
- 00:12:42,219 --> 00:12:43,678 That is great.
- 00:12:43,846 --> 00:12:46,264 Hey, you know who doesn't have to job-hunt?
- 00:12:46,432 --> 00:12:49,976 - Ross. He works at the university. - Yeah?
- 00:12:50,144 --> 00:12:54,105 Oh, so you know that? You guys talked? So you get along? So you're gonna go out?
- 00:12:55,775 --> 00:13:00,111 Me go out with Ross? No. God, no. What would make you think that?
- 00:13:00,279 --> 00:13:02,864 It's just Phoebe...
- 00:13:03,032 --> 00:13:06,493 ...said she, you know, thought she saw something between you guys.
- 00:13:06,660 --> 00:13:08,453 - No. I mean, he's nice. RACHEL: Yeah.
- 00:13:08,621 --> 00:13:12,040 He's the kind of guy you're friends with but not the kind of guy you date.
- 00:13:12,208 --> 00:13:16,002 I mean, he's the kind of guy you date, because you did, but me?
- 00:13:16,212 --> 00:13:18,129 Hmm, not so much.
- 00:13:19,590 --> 00:13:22,133 Oh, not so much? What do you mean?
- 00:13:22,301 --> 00:13:24,677 I mean, is there something wrong with Ross?
- 00:13:24,845 --> 00:13:26,554 Oh, no, no, no. He's just...
- 00:13:26,722 --> 00:13:29,682 I don't know. You know, he's just a little bookish.
- 00:13:30,893 --> 00:13:34,437 - Are you saying he's a geek? - You think so too?
- 00:13:35,356 --> 00:13:37,732 No. No. Ross is not a geek.
- 00:13:37,942 --> 00:13:38,983 [SIGHS]
- 00:13:39,151 --> 00:13:40,902 Fine. Then let's just say he's not my type.
- 00:13:41,070 --> 00:13:43,571 What, handsome is not your type?
- 00:13:43,739 --> 00:13:47,951 Smart, kind, good kisser? What, those things aren't on your list?
- 00:13:48,118 --> 00:13:50,870 Ross is a great guy. You would be lucky to be with him.
- 00:13:51,080 --> 00:13:53,998 Well, okay, if it means that much to you, I'll ask him out.
- 00:13:54,166 --> 00:13:56,626 Oh, no, no, no. That's not what I meant. I was just...
- 00:13:56,794 --> 00:14:01,256 You know what, Rachel? You're right. You know, he has been really nice to me.
- 00:14:01,799 --> 00:14:03,883 Yeah, but he's not your type.
- 00:14:04,677 --> 00:14:06,052 But maybe that's a good thing.
- 00:14:06,262 --> 00:14:08,429 You know, I'm doing all these different things.
- 00:14:08,597 --> 00:14:11,474 Maybe I should just try dating a geek too.
- 00:14:13,018 --> 00:14:16,437 Yeah, but you don't, you know... You don't wanna try too much too fast.
- 00:14:17,565 --> 00:14:20,525 I mean, you do remember what happened to the little girl...
- 00:14:20,693 --> 00:14:22,986 ...who tried too much too fast, don't you?
- 00:14:24,572 --> 00:14:26,155 What?
- 00:14:26,323 --> 00:14:28,741 She died, Jill.
- 00:14:33,914 --> 00:14:36,291 MONICA: Chandler.
- 00:14:37,918 --> 00:14:41,379 CHANDLER: What is it, honey? You need some tea? Some soup?
- 00:14:43,591 --> 00:14:44,966 Oh. Oh.
- 00:14:47,511 --> 00:14:52,056 Calling Dr. Big. Dr. Big to the bed.
- 00:14:52,808 --> 00:14:56,144 Oh, jeez, honey, I thought you were asleep.
- 00:14:56,312 --> 00:15:00,899 How could I be asleep knowing that you were in the next room?
- 00:15:02,526 --> 00:15:03,776 I was asleep.
- 00:15:06,572 --> 00:15:07,822 [SHIVERS]
- 00:15:07,990 --> 00:15:11,576 Oh, no, no, no, honey. You know what's sexy? Layers.
- 00:15:12,119 --> 00:15:13,536 Layers are sexy.
- 00:15:13,704 --> 00:15:17,415 And blankets are sexy. And, oh, hot water bottles are sexy.
- 00:15:17,583 --> 00:15:20,251 Come on, get into bed. I wanna prove that I'm not sick.
- 00:15:20,461 --> 00:15:23,755 I wanna make you feel as good as I feel.
- 00:15:23,923 --> 00:15:25,757 [SNEEZES]
- 00:15:25,925 --> 00:15:29,427 - Would you please get some rest? - I'm fine.
- 00:15:29,595 --> 00:15:32,096 [COUGHING]
- 00:15:35,976 --> 00:15:38,645 [SINGING] Happy birthday to you
- 00:15:41,315 --> 00:15:44,359 - You're paying for that. - What? No, no, it's her birthday.
- 00:15:44,526 --> 00:15:47,278 You've sung "Happy Birthday" to 20 different women today.
- 00:15:48,072 --> 00:15:49,989 - But it... - You are no longer authorized...
- 00:15:50,157 --> 00:15:52,617 ...to distribute birthday muffins.
- 00:15:53,327 --> 00:15:55,161 Damn it.
- 00:15:56,789 --> 00:15:58,206 Rach.
- 00:15:58,374 --> 00:16:00,083 - Hi. - Hi. Ahem.
- 00:16:00,250 --> 00:16:02,502 Did you tell your sister to ask me out?
- 00:16:03,462 --> 00:16:06,798 - Well, yeah. - Oh, wow. I mean, wow.
- 00:16:06,966 --> 00:16:08,675 [CHUCKLES]
- 00:16:08,842 --> 00:16:10,426 I think she's cute...
- 00:16:10,594 --> 00:16:15,098 ...but I never would've thought of going out with her. Never.
- 00:16:15,683 --> 00:16:16,849 - Really? - Yeah.
- 00:16:17,017 --> 00:16:20,061 But after you said it was okay, I figured, why not?
- 00:16:20,813 --> 00:16:23,356 Oh, so not really "never." Heh.
- 00:16:24,149 --> 00:16:27,443 I have to say, you are a much bigger person than I am.
- 00:16:27,611 --> 00:16:30,196 I mean, after all we've been through. I just...
- 00:16:30,406 --> 00:16:32,865 You know what? I wish I had a brother to reciprocate.
- 00:16:33,075 --> 00:16:34,409 Aw.
- 00:16:35,327 --> 00:16:38,287 Hey, if you ever wanna go out with Monica, you have my blessing.
- 00:16:38,455 --> 00:16:39,664 And mine.
- 00:16:42,626 --> 00:16:43,668 Chandler?
- 00:16:44,253 --> 00:16:46,254 I think I'm sick.
- 00:16:46,964 --> 00:16:48,589 Really?
- 00:16:48,757 --> 00:16:49,799 Struck down in the...
- 00:16:49,967 --> 00:16:51,592 [IN CONGESTED VOICE] ...prime of life.
- 00:16:53,053 --> 00:16:57,098 Okay, fine, I admit it. I feel terrible.
- 00:16:57,266 --> 00:17:00,268 - Will you please rub this on my chest? - Okay.
- 00:17:01,228 --> 00:17:04,522 No, no, no. You are not getting me this way.
- 00:17:05,232 --> 00:17:08,901 - Come on, I really need your help here. - No, no, no.
- 00:17:10,362 --> 00:17:13,531 - Fine, I'll rub it on myself. - Okay.
- 00:17:32,760 --> 00:17:36,554 So you're just kind of rubbing it on yourself?
- 00:17:38,515 --> 00:17:41,517 - Yeah. - It's nice.
- 00:17:42,770 --> 00:17:45,480 Are you kidding me? Is this turning you on?
- 00:17:45,647 --> 00:17:47,482 Yes.
- 00:17:48,525 --> 00:17:51,152 I can't believe it. Is it the rubbing or the smell?
- 00:17:51,320 --> 00:17:53,905 It's all very, very good.
- 00:17:57,951 --> 00:18:00,495 So you wanna go, uh...
- 00:18:01,789 --> 00:18:03,456 ...mix it up?
- 00:18:05,125 --> 00:18:08,127 - Not now, I'm sick. - Oh, come on, you big faker.
- 00:18:09,963 --> 00:18:12,673 What about your rule about never sleeping with sick people?
- 00:18:12,841 --> 00:18:16,969 Well, that was before all the vaporizing action.
- 00:18:19,139 --> 00:18:21,224 - Okay, if you really wanna have sex. - Okay.
- 00:18:23,560 --> 00:18:26,020 Worked like a charm.
- 00:18:29,483 --> 00:18:31,776 - Hi. - Hi.
- 00:18:31,944 --> 00:18:33,194 What are you doing here?
- 00:18:33,403 --> 00:18:37,990 This is where Ross and I are meeting for our date. So, what do you think?
- 00:18:39,576 --> 00:18:40,827 I don't like it.
- 00:18:42,579 --> 00:18:45,289 - Really? - It's kind of slutty.
- 00:18:46,792 --> 00:18:48,334 It's yours.
- 00:18:49,962 --> 00:18:52,964 Yeah, well, I'm a slut.
- 00:18:53,966 --> 00:18:55,258 Me too.
- 00:18:59,012 --> 00:19:00,388 - Hi, Jill. - Hey.
- 00:19:00,556 --> 00:19:02,515 Hi...
- 00:19:03,016 --> 00:19:05,184 - Rachel. - Rachel.
- 00:19:05,352 --> 00:19:09,689 Heh. You're not at home, you're right here.
- 00:19:10,190 --> 00:19:11,440 Yeah, I know.
- 00:19:11,608 --> 00:19:15,820 And I bet you thought it would be weird. But it's not.
- 00:19:17,281 --> 00:19:19,657 [JILL & RACHEL CHUCKLE]
- 00:19:21,076 --> 00:19:22,952 Okay.
- 00:19:23,162 --> 00:19:25,580 So, well, I'll, um...
- 00:19:25,747 --> 00:19:27,290 I'll have her home by midnight. Ha, ha.
- 00:19:27,499 --> 00:19:29,500 [LAUGHING]
- 00:19:32,671 --> 00:19:34,672 [SOBBING]
- 00:19:47,561 --> 00:19:50,229 Why aren't you home yet?
- 00:19:50,397 --> 00:19:52,315 MONICA: Is someone there?
- 00:19:53,066 --> 00:19:56,152 Oh, yeah, it's me. Sorry.
- 00:19:56,320 --> 00:19:58,279 CHANDLER: What are you doing here?
- 00:19:59,364 --> 00:20:04,035 Uh, I'm just looking out your window at the view.
- 00:20:04,828 --> 00:20:06,704 What are you guys doing?
- 00:20:07,748 --> 00:20:11,000 CHANDLER: We got some VapoRub in some places.
- 00:20:13,378 --> 00:20:14,879 [RACHEL GASPS]
- 00:20:15,047 --> 00:20:17,840 Oh. He brought her back to his apartment.
- 00:20:18,926 --> 00:20:20,551 Who?
- 00:20:24,598 --> 00:20:25,973 Is that your sister?
- 00:20:26,183 --> 00:20:30,186 Ugh. She is a slut.
- 00:20:31,104 --> 00:20:34,190 God. Ross is on a date with your sister. How weird is that?
- 00:20:34,358 --> 00:20:36,984 Oh, my God, look, he's taking off her clothes.
- 00:20:37,152 --> 00:20:39,528 He's taking off her coat.
- 00:20:40,197 --> 00:20:41,948 RACHEL: Oh, this is just terrible.
- 00:20:42,157 --> 00:20:47,203 Oh, no, it's not. It was the first date. I'm sure that nothing is gonna...
- 00:20:49,623 --> 00:20:51,249 [RACHEL GASPS]
- 00:20:52,626 --> 00:20:56,087 Hoo-hoo. He's gonna get some.
- 00:20:58,465 --> 00:21:00,841 Of the glare...
- 00:21:01,343 --> 00:21:03,594 ...from the streetlight out of his apartment.
- 00:21:03,804 --> 00:21:07,640 You know, so, um, he's closed the drapes there...
- 00:21:07,808 --> 00:21:13,771 ...so he can have a nice pleasant conversation with your little sister.
- 00:21:14,564 --> 00:21:16,190 Well, I'm off to bed.
- 00:21:53,020 --> 00:21:55,021 [English - US - SDH]
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