Эпизод с восточногерманским стиральным порошком
Описание
Ребята сидят в кофейне и обсуждают кем быть лучше: мужчиной или женщиной. Парни восхищаются тем, как девушки снимают бюстгальтер через рукав и всегда «имеют грудь в поле зрения». Девушки парируют, что мужчинам вообще не нужно носить бюстгальтер и они могут писать стоя. После непродолжительной перепалки Росс выкрикивает неоспоримое преимущество женщин — «многократный оргазм». Чендлер собирается вновь бросить Дженис, но не знает как это сделать. Фиби решает поддержать его: она бросит своего парня Тони, а Чендлер — Дженис. Рэйчел расстроена: отец хочет подарить ей кабриолет Мерседес, если она переедет обратно домой, но ей не хочется возвращаться под опеку отца. В это время в кафе заходит бывшая девушка Джоуи — Анджела. Джоуи хочет возобновить отношения, но Анджела встречается с другим парнем — Бобом. Джоуи решает организовать двойное свидание (Анджела—Боб и Джоуи—Моника), чтобы вернуть Анджелу. Однако Монике он сказал, что Боб это всего лишь брат Анджелы. Росс напрашивается на стирку с Рэйчел и Моникой в их прачечной. Из-за свидания, Моника не идёт в прачечную, поэтому Росс и Рэйчел остаются вдвоем. Чендлер объясняет Россу, что это похоже на свидание и нужно подготовиться. Тем временем Моника и Джоуи ожидают в ресторане, Моника понимает, что Джоуи даже не видел Боба и тот может быть не привлекательным. Однако, когда вечер начинается, она успокаивается, так как Боб — красавчик. После того как Моника узнает, что Боб не брат Анджелы, она злится на Джоуи, но тот уговаривает её объединиться и расколоть пару, тогда Боб достанется ей, а Анджела — Джоуи. В конце вечера им это удается. Чендлер и Фиби готовятся к разрыву отношений в кофейне. Приходят Тони и Дженис. У Фиби разрыв получился быстрым и безболезненным, а Чендлер всё никак не может собраться и начать разговор с Дженис: он уже выпил дюжину чашек эсперессо и случайно ударил Дженис в глаз. Фиби предлагает самой бросить Дженис и делает это с такой же легкостью, как и с Тони. На что Чендлер предлагает ей всегда вместе бросать своих девушек. В прачечной у Рэйчел не ладятся дела: сначала хамоватая женщина забирает у неё занятую машину, потом Росс обнаруживает, что у Рэйчел нет порошка и предлагает ей свой немецкий стиральный порошок «Юбервайсс», затем в её бельё попадает красный носок и вся одежда окрасилась в розовый цвет. Но после очередной стычки с хамкой по поводу тележки, она чувствует себя сильной и самостоятельной и в порыве чувств целует Росса, от чего тот ударяется об дверцу машинки. Позже, все друзья сидят в кафе: Рэйчел держит лед у головы Росса после удара, Фиби восхищается как равномерно покрасилась одежда у Рэйчел, Джоуи и Моника хвастаются победой на свидании. Рэйчел спрашивает, где Чендлер, на что Фиби сообщает, что ему нужно прийти в себя после разрыва. В это время мимо кофейни пробегает радостный Чендлер с криками «Я свободен! Свободен!».
Субтитры
- 00:00:02,711 --> 00:00:04,878 Would you let it go? It's not a big deal.
- 00:00:05,130 --> 00:00:06,880 ROSS: Not a big deal? It's amazing.
- 00:00:07,132 --> 00:00:10,009 You just reach in, there's one little maneuver, and bam!
- 00:00:10,218 --> 00:00:12,428 A bra. Right out the sleeve.
- 00:00:12,846 --> 00:00:14,179 As far as I'm concerned...
- 00:00:14,431 --> 00:00:17,683 ...there is nothing a guy can do that comes close. Right?
- 00:00:17,934 --> 00:00:20,894 Come on! You guys can pee standing up.
- 00:00:21,146 --> 00:00:23,355 We can? Okay, I'm trying that.
- 00:00:25,150 --> 00:00:26,692 You know what blows my mind?
- 00:00:26,901 --> 00:00:30,154 Women can see breasts anytime they want.
- 00:00:32,365 --> 00:00:34,533 You just look down, and there they are.
- 00:00:34,743 --> 00:00:37,286 How you get any work done is beyond me.
- 00:00:38,788 --> 00:00:42,291 What I don't get is the way guys can do so many mean things...
- 00:00:42,500 --> 00:00:43,917 ...and then not even care.
- 00:00:50,800 --> 00:00:52,926 Multiple orgasms!
- 00:01:48,733 --> 00:01:50,526 So Saturday night, the big night.
- 00:01:50,777 --> 00:01:53,904 Date night! Saturday night. Saturday night!
- 00:01:55,990 --> 00:01:58,283 - No plans, huh? - Not a one.
- 00:01:59,410 --> 00:02:01,328 Not even, say, breaking up with Janice?
- 00:02:01,579 --> 00:02:03,831 Oh, right, right. Shut up.
- 00:02:05,667 --> 00:02:08,460 Chandler, nobody likes breaking up with someone.
- 00:02:08,753 --> 00:02:12,297 - You just gotta do it. - I know. But it's just so hard.
- 00:02:12,549 --> 00:02:15,509 You're sitting with her. She has no idea what's happening.
- 00:02:15,760 --> 00:02:18,220 You finally get up the courage to do it.
- 00:02:18,471 --> 00:02:21,765 There's that awkward moment when you've handed her the note.
- 00:02:25,478 --> 00:02:27,729 Why do you have to break up with her?
- 00:02:27,939 --> 00:02:30,566 Be a man. Just stop calling.
- 00:02:33,153 --> 00:02:35,112 If you want, I'll do it with you.
- 00:02:35,655 --> 00:02:38,991 Thanks, but she'd feel like we were ganging up on her.
- 00:02:39,242 --> 00:02:41,869 I mean you break up with Janice. I'll break up with Tony.
- 00:02:42,120 --> 00:02:43,537 You're breaking up with Tony?
- 00:02:43,788 --> 00:02:46,456 I know. He's sweet, but it's just not fun anymore.
- 00:02:46,708 --> 00:02:50,002 I don't know if it's me or his hunger strike. I don't know.
- 00:02:52,380 --> 00:02:53,881 Does anybody want anything else?
- 00:02:54,132 --> 00:02:58,635 Yeah. Last week you had a wonderful nutty, chocolate-y, kind of cake-y pie thing that...
- 00:03:00,221 --> 00:03:01,805 Nothing. I'm fine.
- 00:03:04,434 --> 00:03:06,393 What's the matter? Why so scrunchie?
- 00:03:07,020 --> 00:03:10,063 It's my father. He wants to give me a Mercedes convertible.
- 00:03:11,149 --> 00:03:14,193 That guy, he burns me up.
- 00:03:14,736 --> 00:03:17,779 Yeah, well, it's a Mercedes if I move back home.
- 00:03:18,031 --> 00:03:20,949 It was horrible! He called me "young lady."
- 00:03:21,201 --> 00:03:23,577 Ooh, I hate when my father calls me that.
- 00:03:24,704 --> 00:03:27,956 Did he give you that whole "You're not up to this" thing again?
- 00:03:28,166 --> 00:03:31,168 Yeah, I got the extended disco version with three choruses of:
- 00:03:31,377 --> 00:03:33,253 "You'll never make it on your own."
- 00:03:33,504 --> 00:03:34,796 [SINGS] Uh-huh, uh-huh
- 00:03:38,343 --> 00:03:39,843 Hi, Joey.
- 00:03:41,095 --> 00:03:42,262 Oh, my God. Angela.
- 00:03:42,472 --> 00:03:45,682 Wow. Being dumped by you obviously agrees with her.
- 00:03:45,934 --> 00:03:47,809 - Are you gonna go over there? - No.
- 00:03:48,603 --> 00:03:50,103 Yeah. No.
- 00:03:51,314 --> 00:03:54,233 Okay, but not yet. I don't wanna seem too eager.
- 00:03:57,237 --> 00:03:59,863 One Mississippi, two Mississippi...
- 00:04:00,281 --> 00:04:02,324 ...three Mississippi. That seems pretty cool.
- 00:04:06,704 --> 00:04:07,955 Hey, Angela.
- 00:04:08,164 --> 00:04:09,248 Joey.
- 00:04:09,499 --> 00:04:10,707 You look good.
- 00:04:11,209 --> 00:04:14,253 Because I'm wearing a dress that accents my boobs.
- 00:04:21,803 --> 00:04:22,970 You don't say.
- 00:04:24,847 --> 00:04:27,432 So, Rachel, what are you doing tonight?
- 00:04:27,684 --> 00:04:30,727 Big glamour night. Me and Monica at Launderama.
- 00:04:30,937 --> 00:04:32,062 Oh.
- 00:04:32,772 --> 00:04:36,149 You wanna hear a freakish coincidence?
- 00:04:36,359 --> 00:04:38,193 Guess who's doing laundry there too?
- 00:04:38,945 --> 00:04:40,362 - Who? - Me.
- 00:04:41,155 --> 00:04:42,990 Was that not clear?
- 00:04:46,369 --> 00:04:47,661 Hey, why don't...?
- 00:04:47,870 --> 00:04:50,998 Why don't I just join you both there?
- 00:04:51,207 --> 00:04:53,667 Don't you have a laundry room in your building?
- 00:04:55,336 --> 00:04:56,378 Yes.
- 00:04:57,714 --> 00:05:00,549 I do have a laundry room in my building.
- 00:05:02,552 --> 00:05:05,262 Um... But there's a rat problem.
- 00:05:05,513 --> 00:05:08,724 Apparently, they're attracted to the dryer sheets.
- 00:05:08,933 --> 00:05:11,810 They're going in fine, but they're coming out all...
- 00:05:12,520 --> 00:05:13,603 ...fluffy.
- 00:05:16,649 --> 00:05:17,691 Anyway, 7-ish?
- 00:05:18,026 --> 00:05:19,067 Sure.
- 00:05:22,238 --> 00:05:24,323 Forget it, Joey. I'm with Bob now.
- 00:05:24,532 --> 00:05:26,867 Bob? Who the hell's Bob?
- 00:05:27,118 --> 00:05:28,493 Bob is great.
- 00:05:28,703 --> 00:05:31,872 He's smart, he's sophisticated, and he has a real job.
- 00:05:32,123 --> 00:05:36,043 You go on three auditions a month and you call yourself an actor. But Bob...
- 00:05:36,252 --> 00:05:39,296 Come on. We were great together.
- 00:05:39,547 --> 00:05:43,925 And not just at the fun stuff, but, like, talking too.
- 00:05:47,305 --> 00:05:50,098 Sorry, Joey. You said, "Let's just be friends."
- 00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:51,808 So guess what?
- 00:05:52,018 --> 00:05:54,144 - What? - We're just friends.
- 00:05:54,645 --> 00:05:56,063 Fine. Fine.
- 00:05:56,314 --> 00:06:00,067 So why don't the four of us go out and have dinner tonight? You know, as friends.
- 00:06:00,318 --> 00:06:01,651 What "four of us"?
- 00:06:01,903 --> 00:06:05,364 You and Bob, and me and my girlfriend, um...
- 00:06:07,116 --> 00:06:08,158 ...Monica.
- 00:06:08,368 --> 00:06:11,286 JOEY: Monica, I'm telling you, this guy is perfect for you.
- 00:06:11,496 --> 00:06:15,290 Forget it! Not after your cousin who could belch the alphabet.
- 00:06:16,209 --> 00:06:20,045 Come on, this guy's great. His name's Bob. He's Angela's...
- 00:06:20,296 --> 00:06:21,421 ...ahem, brother.
- 00:06:21,631 --> 00:06:23,673 He's smart, he's sophisticated...
- 00:06:23,925 --> 00:06:25,675 ...and he has a real job.
- 00:06:25,927 --> 00:06:29,846 Me, I go on three auditions a month and call myself an actor, but Bob is...
- 00:06:30,098 --> 00:06:31,681 - Oh, God, help us. - What?
- 00:06:31,891 --> 00:06:34,267 Ugly Naked Guy is laying kitchen tile.
- 00:06:36,020 --> 00:06:37,646 BOTH: Ew!
- 00:06:38,147 --> 00:06:40,649 Look, I'm asking a favor here.
- 00:06:40,858 --> 00:06:43,360 I'm thinking if I do this for her brother...
- 00:06:43,611 --> 00:06:45,445 ...maybe Angela will come back to me.
- 00:06:45,696 --> 00:06:48,990 What's going on here? You go out with tons of girls.
- 00:06:49,200 --> 00:06:50,659 I know, but...
- 00:06:52,620 --> 00:06:57,124 Look, I made a huge mistake. I never should've broke up with her.
- 00:06:57,333 --> 00:06:59,668 Will you help me? Please?
- 00:07:06,050 --> 00:07:07,926 Okay. Bye.
- 00:07:08,803 --> 00:07:12,389 Monica's not coming. It's just gonna be me and Rachel.
- 00:07:12,598 --> 00:07:13,557 [ROSS CHUCKLES]
- 00:07:13,766 --> 00:07:16,852 Hold on there, camper. You sure you've thought this through?
- 00:07:17,103 --> 00:07:20,272 It's laundry. The thinking through is pretty minimal.
- 00:07:21,399 --> 00:07:23,525 It's just you and Rachel? Just the two of you?
- 00:07:23,776 --> 00:07:26,027 This is a date. You're going on a date.
- 00:07:27,864 --> 00:07:28,989 Nuh-uh.
- 00:07:31,325 --> 00:07:32,576 Yeah-huh.
- 00:07:33,703 --> 00:07:34,870 What are you saying?
- 00:07:35,121 --> 00:07:37,539 I should shave again? Pick up some wine? What?
- 00:07:37,790 --> 00:07:41,126 Well, you may wanna rethink the dirty underwear.
- 00:07:42,420 --> 00:07:46,548 It's the first time she'll see your underwear. You want it to be dirty?
- 00:07:50,887 --> 00:07:52,179 No.
- 00:07:53,639 --> 00:07:55,807 And the fabric softener?
- 00:07:56,017 --> 00:07:58,810 Okay, okay. Now, what is wrong with my Snuggles?
- 00:08:00,396 --> 00:08:04,065 What? It says I'm a sensitive, warm kind of guy.
- 00:08:04,317 --> 00:08:06,776 You know, like a little fuzzy bear.
- 00:08:08,946 --> 00:08:11,364 I can pick something else up on the way.
- 00:08:16,078 --> 00:08:17,078 MONICA: Thank you.
- 00:08:17,288 --> 00:08:20,499 So what does this Bob guy look like? Is he tall, short?
- 00:08:21,125 --> 00:08:22,626 Yep.
- 00:08:23,419 --> 00:08:24,461 Which?
- 00:08:24,921 --> 00:08:26,171 Which what?
- 00:08:27,673 --> 00:08:29,799 You've never met Bob, have you?
- 00:08:30,009 --> 00:08:31,092 No, but...
- 00:08:31,344 --> 00:08:33,720 For all we know, he could be horribly...
- 00:08:35,806 --> 00:08:39,100 Horribly attractive. I'll be shutting up now.
- 00:08:44,148 --> 00:08:46,399 Where are they? Where are they?
- 00:08:46,609 --> 00:08:49,945 This is nice. We never do anything, just the two of us.
- 00:08:50,571 --> 00:08:54,741 That's great. Maybe tomorrow we can rent a car, run over some puppies.
- 00:08:54,951 --> 00:08:56,493 Ew. I don't wanna do that.
- 00:08:59,247 --> 00:09:01,998 - Here we go. - Have a good breakup.
- 00:09:03,751 --> 00:09:07,379 - Hey, Janice. - My God, I am so glad you called me.
- 00:09:07,588 --> 00:09:10,840 I had the most supremely awful day.
- 00:09:12,134 --> 00:09:13,468 That's not good.
- 00:09:14,929 --> 00:09:17,889 Can I get an espresso and a latte over here, please?
- 00:09:18,140 --> 00:09:21,059 We got the proofs from that photo shoot with the vegetables.
- 00:09:21,310 --> 00:09:22,352 They sucked.
- 00:09:22,562 --> 00:09:25,564 I blew off the rest of the afternoon. I went shopping.
- 00:09:25,815 --> 00:09:28,733 And I got you...
- 00:09:28,985 --> 00:09:31,945 JANICE: I'm looking. I'm looking.
- 00:09:32,363 --> 00:09:34,489 I'm looking.
- 00:09:35,199 --> 00:09:36,491 - I got you... - What?
- 00:09:36,701 --> 00:09:40,412 - What? - What did you get me there?
- 00:09:40,705 --> 00:09:43,123 I got you...
- 00:09:43,624 --> 00:09:45,000 ...these.
- 00:09:45,835 --> 00:09:47,752 Bullwinkle socks.
- 00:09:48,004 --> 00:09:50,380 - That's so sweet. - I knew you had the Rockys.
- 00:09:50,631 --> 00:09:52,716 So you could wear Bullwinkle and Bullwinkle...
- 00:09:52,967 --> 00:09:56,052 ...or wear Rocky and Rocky, or you can mix and match.
- 00:09:56,262 --> 00:09:58,138 Moose and squirrel.
- 00:09:58,347 --> 00:10:00,223 Whatever you want.
- 00:10:04,270 --> 00:10:06,938 I'm gonna get another espresso. More latte?
- 00:10:08,482 --> 00:10:09,691 No.
- 00:10:10,067 --> 00:10:13,153 No, I'm still working on mine.
- 00:10:13,529 --> 00:10:15,322 [JANICE LAUGHS OBNOXIOUSLY]
- 00:10:17,783 --> 00:10:18,825 That's it?
- 00:10:19,076 --> 00:10:20,493 Yeah, it was really hard.
- 00:10:20,953 --> 00:10:22,871 Yeah, the hug looked pretty brutal.
- 00:10:23,539 --> 00:10:24,831 Okay, you weren't there.
- 00:10:37,720 --> 00:10:40,055 WOMAN: Coming through! Move! Move!
- 00:10:45,269 --> 00:10:48,647 Excuse me! I was kind of using that machine.
- 00:10:48,898 --> 00:10:51,316 Yeah, well, now you're kind of not.
- 00:10:52,526 --> 00:10:55,403 But I saved it. I put my basket on top.
- 00:10:55,655 --> 00:10:58,114 - I'm sorry. Is that your basket? - Yes.
- 00:10:58,366 --> 00:11:01,368 It's really pretty. Unfortunately, I don't see suds!
- 00:11:03,913 --> 00:11:04,954 What?
- 00:11:06,123 --> 00:11:09,292 No suds, no save, okay?
- 00:11:12,171 --> 00:11:13,630 - What's going on? - Hi.
- 00:11:13,839 --> 00:11:17,592 Nothing. This horrible woman just took my machine.
- 00:11:17,885 --> 00:11:19,344 Was your basket on top?
- 00:11:19,595 --> 00:11:21,805 - Yeah, but there were no suds. - So?
- 00:11:22,056 --> 00:11:23,556 You know, no suds, no save.
- 00:11:23,808 --> 00:11:25,767 No suds, no... Excuse me.
- 00:11:26,018 --> 00:11:27,602 Hold on a second!
- 00:11:27,812 --> 00:11:29,979 This is my friend's machine.
- 00:11:30,231 --> 00:11:32,399 Hey, hey, hey! Her stuff wasn't in it!
- 00:11:32,650 --> 00:11:36,653 Hey, hey, hey! That's not the rule, and you know it!
- 00:11:47,164 --> 00:11:48,707 All right. Show's over.
- 00:11:51,669 --> 00:11:53,878 Nothing to see here.
- 00:11:56,298 --> 00:11:58,466 Okay. Let's do laundry.
- 00:11:58,676 --> 00:12:02,470 That was amazing! I can't even send back soup.
- 00:12:02,722 --> 00:12:07,225 Well, that's because you're such a sweet, gentle...
- 00:12:09,562 --> 00:12:10,729 Do you, uh?
- 00:12:10,938 --> 00:12:13,440 Oh, hey. You must need detergent.
- 00:12:17,403 --> 00:12:19,362 - What's that? - Überweiss.
- 00:12:20,322 --> 00:12:23,450 It's new. It's German. It's extra tough!
- 00:12:25,536 --> 00:12:27,746 Rach, do you...? Are you gonna separate those?
- 00:12:29,331 --> 00:12:31,332 Oh, God. Ugh.
- 00:12:31,584 --> 00:12:33,960 Am I being like a total laundry spaz?
- 00:12:34,211 --> 00:12:38,047 Am I supposed to use one machine for shirts and another for pants?
- 00:12:41,594 --> 00:12:44,679 Have you...? Have you never done this before?
- 00:12:44,930 --> 00:12:48,057 Well, not myself. But I know other people that have.
- 00:12:49,852 --> 00:12:52,896 Okay. You caught me. I'm a laundry virgin.
- 00:12:54,565 --> 00:12:57,609 Don't worry. I'll use the gentle cycle.
- 00:12:57,818 --> 00:12:58,985 [BOTH CHUCKLE]
- 00:12:59,904 --> 00:13:00,987 Okay...
- 00:13:02,364 --> 00:13:05,950 Basically, you wanna use one machine for all your whites.
- 00:13:06,160 --> 00:13:07,160 Whites. Okay.
- 00:13:07,369 --> 00:13:09,662 - A whole other machine for your colors. - Colors.
- 00:13:09,872 --> 00:13:12,707 And then a third for your, uh...
- 00:13:14,668 --> 00:13:17,337 ...delicates. And that would be your bras...
- 00:13:17,588 --> 00:13:20,840 ...and your underpanty things.
- 00:13:23,010 --> 00:13:26,054 Okay, well, these are white cotton panties.
- 00:13:26,263 --> 00:13:28,765 Would they go with whites or with delicates?
- 00:13:29,391 --> 00:13:31,476 That would be a judgment call.
- 00:13:33,646 --> 00:13:35,146 [ALL LAUGHING]
- 00:13:36,649 --> 00:13:38,441 He's so cute!
- 00:13:40,361 --> 00:13:42,070 So where did you guys grow up?
- 00:13:42,321 --> 00:13:44,364 - Brooklyn Heights. - Cleveland.
- 00:13:44,573 --> 00:13:45,782 Ha. Heh, heh, heh.
- 00:13:46,033 --> 00:13:47,826 - How did that happen? - Oh, my God!
- 00:13:48,202 --> 00:13:49,619 What?
- 00:13:50,120 --> 00:13:52,372 I suddenly had the feeling I was...
- 00:13:52,623 --> 00:13:54,207 ...falling.
- 00:13:55,543 --> 00:13:56,584 But I'm not.
- 00:14:06,887 --> 00:14:09,055 So you and Angela, huh?
- 00:14:09,306 --> 00:14:11,516 Yep. Pretty much.
- 00:14:11,934 --> 00:14:13,393 - You're a lucky man. - Yeah.
- 00:14:14,520 --> 00:14:16,563 You know what I miss the most about her?
- 00:14:16,814 --> 00:14:20,066 That cute nibbley noise she makes when she eats.
- 00:14:20,276 --> 00:14:23,361 Like a happy little squirrel...
- 00:14:24,029 --> 00:14:25,697 ...or a weasel.
- 00:14:27,116 --> 00:14:28,533 I never really noticed.
- 00:14:28,742 --> 00:14:31,160 Oh, yeah, yeah. Listen for it.
- 00:14:32,037 --> 00:14:34,038 Monica. Monica is great.
- 00:14:34,290 --> 00:14:36,541 Yeah. Yeah, she is.
- 00:14:36,792 --> 00:14:38,960 But it's not gonna last.
- 00:14:40,671 --> 00:14:43,006 She's too much for me in bed.
- 00:14:44,216 --> 00:14:45,258 Sexually.
- 00:14:48,929 --> 00:14:51,806 I've gotta tell you, Bob is terrific.
- 00:14:52,057 --> 00:14:53,349 Yeah, isn't he?
- 00:14:53,601 --> 00:14:56,477 It's so great to meet a guy who's smart and funny...
- 00:14:56,729 --> 00:14:59,063 ...and has an emotional age beyond 8.
- 00:14:59,315 --> 00:15:02,817 You know what else? He's unbelievable in bed!
- 00:15:05,029 --> 00:15:06,237 Wow!
- 00:15:06,989 --> 00:15:10,033 My brother never even told me when he lost his virginity.
- 00:15:11,452 --> 00:15:12,493 Huh.
- 00:15:13,203 --> 00:15:14,454 That's nice.
- 00:15:19,710 --> 00:15:22,670 You can do this. It's like pulling off a Band-Aid.
- 00:15:22,922 --> 00:15:26,925 Just do it really fast, and then the wound is exposed.
- 00:15:27,176 --> 00:15:28,676 Go! Go!
- 00:15:37,227 --> 00:15:38,770 Janice...
- 00:15:41,607 --> 00:15:42,732 Hi, Janice.
- 00:15:44,276 --> 00:15:47,820 Okay, here we go. I don't think we should go out anymore.
- 00:15:50,658 --> 00:15:51,866 Janice.
- 00:15:55,245 --> 00:15:56,621 All right.
- 00:15:59,166 --> 00:16:00,333 Well...
- 00:16:01,293 --> 00:16:03,086 Well, there you go.
- 00:16:03,879 --> 00:16:05,505 Stop it, stop it, stop it.
- 00:16:10,135 --> 00:16:13,304 RACHEL: Okay, I know this is gonna sound really stupid...
- 00:16:13,555 --> 00:16:15,807 ...but I feel that if I can do this...
- 00:16:16,058 --> 00:16:18,935 ...if I can actually do my own laundry...
- 00:16:19,144 --> 00:16:21,020 ...there isn't anything I can't do.
- 00:16:21,981 --> 00:16:24,357 That does not sound stupid to me.
- 00:16:24,566 --> 00:16:28,653 No, it's like... The first time I had to make dinner for myself after Carol left me...
- 00:16:28,862 --> 00:16:29,862 [WASHER BUZZES]
- 00:16:30,072 --> 00:16:32,949 I'm sorry, that's all the time we have. Next on Ross...
- 00:16:33,158 --> 00:16:34,325 [RACHEL LAUGHS]
- 00:16:34,535 --> 00:16:35,535 Okay.
- 00:16:35,744 --> 00:16:36,953 - Uh-oh. - What, "uh-oh"?
- 00:16:37,204 --> 00:16:38,329 Uh-oh...
- 00:16:38,539 --> 00:16:41,457 Uh-oh, the laundry's done.
- 00:16:42,960 --> 00:16:44,627 It's a song.
- 00:16:44,878 --> 00:16:46,713 The laundry song that we sing.
- 00:16:47,756 --> 00:16:51,092 [SINGS] Uh-oh, the laundry's done
- 00:16:51,927 --> 00:16:52,969 What's the matter?
- 00:16:53,220 --> 00:16:54,303 Nothing. Nothing.
- 00:16:54,555 --> 00:16:55,888 [SINGS] The laundry's done
- 00:16:56,140 --> 00:16:57,223 Come on, show me.
- 00:16:57,474 --> 00:17:01,561 It's just that you left a red sock in with your whites, and now...
- 00:17:04,273 --> 00:17:07,400 ...everything's kind of pink. - Oh.
- 00:17:07,943 --> 00:17:09,318 Everything's pink?
- 00:17:09,570 --> 00:17:12,321 Except for the red sock, which is still red.
- 00:17:12,781 --> 00:17:15,283 Don't be upset. It can happen to anyone.
- 00:17:15,534 --> 00:17:17,410 But it didn't. It happened to me.
- 00:17:17,661 --> 00:17:21,247 God, I'm gonna look like a big Marshmallow Peep!
- 00:17:21,457 --> 00:17:23,291 What am I doing? What am I doing?
- 00:17:23,542 --> 00:17:26,711 My father's right! I can't live on my own.
- 00:17:26,920 --> 00:17:29,422 I can't even do laundry!
- 00:17:30,799 --> 00:17:32,633 [WOMAN LAUGHS]
- 00:17:35,220 --> 00:17:36,971 [NIBBLING]
- 00:17:40,934 --> 00:17:42,810 Something went wrong with Underdog...
- 00:17:43,062 --> 00:17:45,271 ...and they couldn't get his head to inflate.
- 00:17:46,607 --> 00:17:48,191 So anyway...
- 00:17:49,443 --> 00:17:52,236 ...his head is, like, flopping down Broadway.
- 00:17:53,363 --> 00:17:54,447 And I'm thinking...
- 00:17:55,657 --> 00:17:58,409 ...how inappropriate this is.
- 00:17:58,786 --> 00:18:02,789 I've got something's in my eye. Joey, could we check it in the light, please?
- 00:18:06,126 --> 00:18:07,543 - Oh, my God! - What?
- 00:18:07,795 --> 00:18:10,505 Hello! Were we at the same table? It's like...
- 00:18:10,714 --> 00:18:13,007 ...cocktails in Appalachia.
- 00:18:17,513 --> 00:18:21,682 - Come on, they're close. - Close? She's got her tongue in his ear.
- 00:18:22,476 --> 00:18:26,479 Like you've never got a little rambunctious with Ross.
- 00:18:27,689 --> 00:18:31,400 Joey, this is sick. It's disgusting. It's...
- 00:18:32,236 --> 00:18:33,903 ...not really true, is it?
- 00:18:34,154 --> 00:18:35,822 Who's to say what's true?
- 00:18:36,073 --> 00:18:37,156 What were you thinking?
- 00:18:37,407 --> 00:18:39,951 Look, I'm not proud of this, okay?
- 00:18:40,202 --> 00:18:41,619 Well, maybe I am a little.
- 00:18:41,829 --> 00:18:43,496 - Oh. - Ow!
- 00:18:43,705 --> 00:18:45,581 - I'm out of here! - Wait! Come on!
- 00:18:45,791 --> 00:18:47,667 You like him. I want her.
- 00:18:47,918 --> 00:18:49,335 He likes you.
- 00:18:50,129 --> 00:18:52,004 - Really? - Yeah.
- 00:18:52,256 --> 00:18:55,967 I'm thinking, if we put our heads together, between the two of us...
- 00:18:56,176 --> 00:18:58,261 ...we can break them up.
- 00:19:01,098 --> 00:19:03,516 MONICA: I'm so sorry. I can't believe I did this.
- 00:19:03,767 --> 00:19:07,228 I just couldn't stop laughing at your Norman Mailer story.
- 00:19:10,524 --> 00:19:12,191 [NIBBLING]
- 00:19:13,569 --> 00:19:16,821 Waiter? One more plate of chicken wings over here.
- 00:19:23,036 --> 00:19:25,496 Here's the thing. It's like we're different.
- 00:19:25,747 --> 00:19:27,707 I'm the bing, you're the boom...
- 00:19:27,958 --> 00:19:29,000 JANICE: Ow! - Oh!
- 00:19:29,209 --> 00:19:30,543 - Oh, my God! - Ow!
- 00:19:30,752 --> 00:19:31,794 - I'm so sorry! - Ow!
- 00:19:32,254 --> 00:19:33,629 - Are you okay? - Ow!
- 00:19:34,840 --> 00:19:36,883 It's just my lens. It's my lens.
- 00:19:37,676 --> 00:19:39,135 I'll be right back.
- 00:19:41,513 --> 00:19:43,848 I hit her in the eye! I hit her in the eye!
- 00:19:44,099 --> 00:19:47,602 This is the worst breakup in the history of the world!
- 00:19:47,853 --> 00:19:49,604 Oh, my God.
- 00:19:51,732 --> 00:19:53,191 How many of those have you had?
- 00:19:53,442 --> 00:19:55,610 I don't know. A million!
- 00:19:56,486 --> 00:19:59,739 Chandler, shh, shh. Easy, easy. Go to your happy place.
- 00:20:00,032 --> 00:20:02,158 [HUMMING] La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la
- 00:20:03,285 --> 00:20:05,661 - I'm fine, I'm fine. - All right.
- 00:20:05,871 --> 00:20:07,705 I'm not fine. Here she comes.
- 00:20:07,915 --> 00:20:09,749 Wait here, okay? Breathe.
- 00:20:12,586 --> 00:20:14,712 [PHOEBE & JANICE SPEAKING INAUDIBLEY]
- 00:20:28,727 --> 00:20:30,061 How do you do that?
- 00:20:30,312 --> 00:20:32,355 It's like a gift.
- 00:20:35,025 --> 00:20:37,360 We should always, always break up together.
- 00:20:37,611 --> 00:20:38,736 I'd like that.
- 00:20:40,864 --> 00:20:43,991 ROSS: You got the clothes clean. That's the important part.
- 00:20:44,201 --> 00:20:47,578 I guess. Except everything looks like jammies now.
- 00:20:53,252 --> 00:20:54,669 Whoa, I'm sorry.
- 00:20:54,920 --> 00:20:57,421 Excuse me. We had this cart.
- 00:20:58,131 --> 00:21:00,841 I had a 24-inch waist. You lose things.
- 00:21:01,051 --> 00:21:03,344 Now, come on. Get out of my way.
- 00:21:03,595 --> 00:21:07,223 I'm sorry. Maybe I wasn't being clear. This was our cart.
- 00:21:07,516 --> 00:21:09,475 Hey, hey, hey. There aren't any clothes in it!
- 00:21:09,726 --> 00:21:12,311 Hey, hey, hey! Quit making up rules!
- 00:21:12,562 --> 00:21:15,940 Let go! Come on, this is my cart. You know I saw it first.
- 00:21:16,191 --> 00:21:18,401 Listen, Mitzi, if you want this cart...
- 00:21:18,610 --> 00:21:21,153 ...you're gonna have to take me with it!
- 00:21:28,453 --> 00:21:30,329 Yes! Did you see that?
- 00:21:30,580 --> 00:21:31,789 You were incredible.
- 00:21:31,999 --> 00:21:34,500 A brand-new woman, ladies and gentlemen.
- 00:21:34,710 --> 00:21:37,086 I could not have done this without you.
- 00:21:43,468 --> 00:21:44,677 ROSS: Okay, um...
- 00:21:44,886 --> 00:21:47,805 Uh... More clothes in the dryer?
- 00:21:50,058 --> 00:21:52,184 - I'm fine. I'm fine. - Are you sure?
- 00:21:55,897 --> 00:21:58,190 - Are you sure you're okay? - Yeah.
- 00:21:58,483 --> 00:22:00,484 - Does it still hurt? - Yeah.
- 00:22:03,113 --> 00:22:06,949 What a neat idea. All your clothes match. I'm gonna do this.
- 00:22:08,744 --> 00:22:09,744 MONICA: Hi!
- 00:22:09,953 --> 00:22:10,995 PHOEBE: How'd it go?
- 00:22:11,204 --> 00:22:12,246 Excellent!
- 00:22:12,497 --> 00:22:16,751 We ripped that couple apart and kept the pieces for ourselves.
- 00:22:18,003 --> 00:22:19,337 What a beautiful story.
- 00:22:21,840 --> 00:22:23,090 I'm fine, by the way.
- 00:22:23,342 --> 00:22:24,675 I'm sorry.
- 00:22:25,177 --> 00:22:28,095 - Where's Chandler? - He needed some time to grieve.
- 00:22:28,347 --> 00:22:30,598 CHANDLER: I'm free! I'm free!
- 00:22:32,684 --> 00:22:34,268 That ought to do it.
- 00:22:40,942 --> 00:22:42,943 [English - US - SDH]
- 00:00:02,710 --> 00:00:05,080 Может, хватит? Здесь нет ничего особенного
- 00:00:05,130 --> 00:00:07,090 Ничего особенного? Да это просто чудо!
- 00:00:07,130 --> 00:00:10,170 Вы запускаете туда руку, легкое движение - и бац!
- 00:00:10,210 --> 00:00:12,800 Лифчик - прямо из рукава!
- 00:00:12,840 --> 00:00:14,390 Насколько я знаю...
- 00:00:14,430 --> 00:00:17,890 ...мужчины и близко ничем подобным похвастать не могут, так?
- 00:00:17,930 --> 00:00:19,020 Да ну!
- 00:00:19,060 --> 00:00:21,100 Вы, мужики, умеете писать стоя
- 00:00:21,140 --> 00:00:25,100 Правда можем? Надо попробовать
- 00:00:25,150 --> 00:00:26,650 А знаете, от чего у меня срывает крышу?
- 00:00:26,900 --> 00:00:32,190 У женщин всегда сиськи перед глазами, стоит только захотеть
- 00:00:32,360 --> 00:00:34,700 Один взгляд вниз - и они там
- 00:00:34,740 --> 00:00:38,740 Как вы ухитряетесь работать - не постигаю!
- 00:00:38,780 --> 00:00:42,460 Ой, ой, а я удивляюсь, как это мужики делают любые подлости...
- 00:00:42,500 --> 00:00:45,460 ...и им на все наплевать
- 00:00:50,800 --> 00:00:54,470 Множественные оргазмы!
- 00:00:57,180 --> 00:01:00,350 1-й сезон, 5-я серия "Крутой немецкий стиральный порошок"
- 00:01:48,650 --> 00:01:50,650 Ну что, субботний вечер, великий вечер!
- 00:01:50,690 --> 00:01:55,570 Оттянемся по полной мы в субботний вечер!
- 00:01:55,900 --> 00:01:59,280 - Планов нет вообще? - Ни единого!
- 00:01:59,320 --> 00:02:01,450 Даже, скажем, Дженис не бросишь?
- 00:02:01,490 --> 00:02:05,290 Ах да-да-да. Рот закрой!
- 00:02:05,580 --> 00:02:08,420 Чендлер, никто не любит кого-то бросать
- 00:02:08,670 --> 00:02:12,210 - Но приходится. - Знаю. Но это так тяжело...
- 00:02:12,460 --> 00:02:15,420 Ты сидишь рядом с ней... Она не догадывается, что будет дальше...
- 00:02:15,670 --> 00:02:18,340 Наконец, собираешь все свое мужество
- 00:02:18,380 --> 00:02:23,640 Чтобы неловко и смущенно передать ей записочку
- 00:02:25,390 --> 00:02:27,810 Зачем тебе вообще ее бросать?
- 00:02:27,850 --> 00:02:32,020 Будь мужчиной - просто перестань звонить!
- 00:02:33,070 --> 00:02:35,530 Если хочешь, сделаем это вместе
- 00:02:35,570 --> 00:02:39,110 Спасибо, нет. Она не поймет, почему ее бросают сразу двое
- 00:02:39,160 --> 00:02:41,780 Нет, в том плане, что ты бросишь Дженис, а я брошу Тони
- 00:02:42,030 --> 00:02:43,580 Ой, а ты бросаешь Тони?
- 00:02:43,700 --> 00:02:46,580 Да! Он милый, но с ним стало скучно
- 00:02:46,620 --> 00:02:51,750 Не знаю, виновата ли в этом я или его голодная забастовка
- 00:02:52,290 --> 00:02:54,000 Кто-нибудь хочет что-нибудь еще?
- 00:02:54,050 --> 00:03:00,090 Ой, да. У вас тут были такие классные орехово-шоколадные пироженки...
- 00:03:00,130 --> 00:03:03,260 Нет, спасибо, ничего не надо
- 00:03:04,350 --> 00:03:06,890 Что такое? Чего мы такие злые?
- 00:03:06,930 --> 00:03:11,020 Да это отец. Он хочет подарить мне "Мерседес" с откидным верхом
- 00:03:11,060 --> 00:03:14,610 Этот папаша - он просто беспощаден
- 00:03:14,650 --> 00:03:17,900 "Мерседес" будет при условии, что я вернусь домой
- 00:03:17,940 --> 00:03:21,070 Это был ужас! Он назвал меня "барышней"
- 00:03:21,110 --> 00:03:24,580 У-у, я терпеть не мог это обращение от моего отца
- 00:03:24,620 --> 00:03:28,040 Он опять завел свою песню "Эта жизнь не для тебя"?
- 00:03:28,080 --> 00:03:31,040 Ага, расширенный диско-ремикс с тройным повтором припева...
- 00:03:31,290 --> 00:03:34,710 ..."Ты одна не проживешь."
- 00:03:38,260 --> 00:03:40,760 Привет, Джои
- 00:03:41,010 --> 00:03:42,340 Боже мой! Анджела!
- 00:03:42,390 --> 00:03:45,810 Ого! То, что ты ее бросил, явно пошло ей на пользу
- 00:03:45,850 --> 00:03:48,470 - Ты к ней подойдешь? - Нет.
- 00:03:48,520 --> 00:03:50,980 Да... Нет
- 00:03:51,230 --> 00:03:56,730 Ладно, потом. Не хочу показаться заинтересованным
- 00:03:57,150 --> 00:03:59,940 Раз Миссисипи, два Миссисипи...
- 00:04:00,190 --> 00:04:03,780 ...три Миссисипи. Теперь можно
- 00:04:06,620 --> 00:04:09,410 - Привет, Анджела. - Джои.
- 00:04:09,410 --> 00:04:11,080 Отлично выглядишь
- 00:04:11,120 --> 00:04:17,800 Это благодаря платью, которое подчеркивает мои сиськи
- 00:04:21,720 --> 00:04:24,430 Кто бы мог подумать!
- 00:04:24,760 --> 00:04:27,560 Рэйчел, какие у тебя планы на вечер?
- 00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:32,640 Ночь светских львиц! Идем с Моникой в "Постирайку"
- 00:04:32,690 --> 00:04:36,020 Знаешь, какое странное совпадение!
- 00:04:36,270 --> 00:04:38,820 Угадай, кто еще там стирает?
- 00:04:38,860 --> 00:04:41,030 - Кто? - Я!
- 00:04:41,070 --> 00:04:44,450 Разве было не очевидно?
- 00:04:46,280 --> 00:04:47,700 Слушай, может, я...
- 00:04:47,780 --> 00:04:50,870 Может, мы пойдем вместе... все втроем?
- 00:04:51,120 --> 00:04:56,170 А у тебя в доме разве нет прачечной?
- 00:04:57,630 --> 00:05:03,050 У меня таки есть в доме прачечная
- 00:05:03,470 --> 00:05:05,380 Но там проблема с крысами
- 00:05:05,430 --> 00:05:08,800 Похоже, они обожают спать в сушилках
- 00:05:08,850 --> 00:05:12,520 Внутри их сразу не замечаешь, а выпадают они такими...
- 00:05:12,560 --> 00:05:15,060 ...пушистыми
- 00:05:16,560 --> 00:05:18,020 Так, значит, часов в семь?
- 00:05:18,060 --> 00:05:20,520 Ага
- 00:05:22,150 --> 00:05:24,400 Брось, Джои. Теперь я с Бобом
- 00:05:24,450 --> 00:05:26,990 С Бобом?.. С каким еще на фиг Бобом?
- 00:05:27,030 --> 00:05:28,570 Боб - чудо
- 00:05:28,620 --> 00:05:31,990 Он умный, утонченный, и имеет настоящую работу
- 00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:36,120 А ты ходишь на три пробы в месяц и зовешь себя актером. А вот Боб...
- 00:05:36,170 --> 00:05:39,420 Да ладно! Нам было хорошо вместе
- 00:05:39,460 --> 00:05:46,840 И не только в главном смысле. Но, типа... и поговорить тоже
- 00:05:47,220 --> 00:05:50,220 Ну извини, Джои, ты сам сказал: "Останемся друзьями."
- 00:05:50,260 --> 00:05:51,890 И угадай что?
- 00:05:51,930 --> 00:05:54,310 - Что? - Мы остались друзьями.
- 00:05:54,560 --> 00:05:56,190 Ну и ладно. Ладно!
- 00:05:56,230 --> 00:06:00,190 Тогда давай поужинаем сегодня вчетвером, а? Чисто как друзья
- 00:06:00,230 --> 00:06:01,690 С кем вчетвером?
- 00:06:01,820 --> 00:06:07,200 Ну, ты с Бобом, а я со своей новой девушкой...
- 00:06:07,240 --> 00:06:08,240 ...Моникой
- 00:06:08,280 --> 00:06:11,370 Моника, говорю тебе, он твой идеал
- 00:06:11,410 --> 00:06:15,870 Никогда! Помню твоего кузена, который проговаривал отрыжкой весь алфавит
- 00:06:16,120 --> 00:06:19,960 Ладно тебе! Он - чудо. Его зовут Боб. Он сейчас у Анджелы...
- 00:06:20,210 --> 00:06:21,500 ...брат
- 00:06:21,540 --> 00:06:23,590 Он умный, утонченный...
- 00:06:23,840 --> 00:06:25,590 ...и имеет настоящую работу
- 00:06:25,840 --> 00:06:29,970 Это я хожу на три пробы в месяц и называю себя актером, а вот Боб...
- 00:06:30,010 --> 00:06:31,760 - Господи помилуй! - Что?
- 00:06:31,800 --> 00:06:35,890 Гадкий Голый Дядька кладет плитку на кухне
- 00:06:38,060 --> 00:06:40,730 Ну прошу тебя, сделай мне одолжение!
- 00:06:40,770 --> 00:06:43,480 Я так думаю, если я пристрою ее брата...
- 00:06:43,520 --> 00:06:45,570 ...то и Анджела может ко мне вернуться
- 00:06:45,610 --> 00:06:49,070 Что тебе приспичило? У тебя же тысячи девиц
- 00:06:49,110 --> 00:06:52,120 Так-то оно так, но...
- 00:06:52,530 --> 00:06:57,200 Понимаешь, я страшно ошибся. Не стоило ее бросать
- 00:06:57,250 --> 00:07:02,170 Ну поможешь мне? Пожалуйста!
- 00:07:05,800 --> 00:07:07,760 Ладно. Пока.
- 00:07:08,720 --> 00:07:13,640 Ну вот, Моники не будет. Только я и Рэйчел
- 00:07:13,680 --> 00:07:16,970 Стоп, живчик. Ты все продумал?
- 00:07:17,020 --> 00:07:21,270 Это стирка - тут особо нечего продумывать
- 00:07:21,310 --> 00:07:23,650 Будут только ты и Рэйчел? Только вдвоем?
- 00:07:23,690 --> 00:07:28,530 Это свидание. Ты идешь на свидание
- 00:07:29,110 --> 00:07:31,990 - Не-а. - Да-а.
- 00:07:33,620 --> 00:07:34,990 Ну и что ты хочешь сказать?
- 00:07:35,030 --> 00:07:37,660 Надо тщательней побриться? Взять с собой вино? Что?
- 00:07:37,700 --> 00:07:42,290 Ну, например, подумай о грязном белье
- 00:07:42,330 --> 00:07:50,090 Она в первый раз увидит твое белье. Ты хочешь, чтобы оно было грязным?
- 00:07:50,630 --> 00:07:52,340 Нет
- 00:07:53,550 --> 00:07:56,510 Да, кстати, а смягчитель для ткани?
- 00:07:56,560 --> 00:08:00,270 А смягчитель чем тебе не угодил?
- 00:08:00,310 --> 00:08:04,190 Что? Он говорит, что я - чувствительная и теплая натура
- 00:08:04,230 --> 00:08:08,650 Как маленький пушистый мишка
- 00:08:08,860 --> 00:08:12,820 Хорошо, я куплю что-нибудь по дороге
- 00:08:16,120 --> 00:08:16,910 Спасибо
- 00:08:17,160 --> 00:08:21,000 Так как этот Боб хоть выглядит? Он высокий, он низкий?
- 00:08:21,040 --> 00:08:23,290 Ага
- 00:08:23,540 --> 00:08:24,790 Что?
- 00:08:24,830 --> 00:08:27,550 Что "что"?
- 00:08:27,590 --> 00:08:30,090 Ты никогда не видел Боба, да?
- 00:08:30,130 --> 00:08:31,220 Нет, но...
- 00:08:31,260 --> 00:08:35,680 О господи, Джои. По моему опыту, он запросто может оказаться...
- 00:08:35,720 --> 00:08:40,850 Таким красавчиком. Я уже молчу
- 00:08:44,060 --> 00:08:46,480 Где они? Где они?
- 00:08:46,520 --> 00:08:50,440 Как здорово. Мы никогда ничего не делали с тобой вдвоем
- 00:08:50,480 --> 00:08:55,110 Отлично. Завтра давай возьмем машину и задавим на дороге пару щенков
- 00:08:55,160 --> 00:08:57,950 Нет, этого я делать не хочу
- 00:08:59,160 --> 00:09:03,660 - Вот и она. - Отлично. Удачного тебе разрыва!
- 00:09:03,660 --> 00:09:07,460 - Привет, Дженис. - Боже, какое счастье, что ты позвонил.
- 00:09:07,500 --> 00:09:12,010 У меня был жутко дико страшный день
- 00:09:12,050 --> 00:09:14,590 Ой, я уже боюсь
- 00:09:14,840 --> 00:09:18,010 Можно мне "Эспрессо" и "латэ" сюда, пожалуйста!
- 00:09:18,050 --> 00:09:21,180 Мы получили пробные снимки с нашей овощной фотосессии
- 00:09:21,220 --> 00:09:22,430 Они никуда не годятся
- 00:09:22,480 --> 00:09:25,690 Так что я прогуляла полдня, пошла по магазинам...
- 00:09:25,730 --> 00:09:28,650 ...и - купила тебе...
- 00:09:28,900 --> 00:09:32,030 Ищу, ищу
- 00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:34,860 Опять ищу
- 00:09:35,110 --> 00:09:36,570 - Купила тебе... - Что?
- 00:09:36,610 --> 00:09:40,580 - Что? - Что... ты мне купила?
- 00:09:40,620 --> 00:09:43,290 Я купила тебе...
- 00:09:43,540 --> 00:09:45,500 ...их
- 00:09:45,750 --> 00:09:47,880 Носки с Бульвинклем!
- 00:09:47,920 --> 00:09:50,500 - Как это мило. - Ну, у тебя же есть Роки.
- 00:09:50,540 --> 00:09:52,840 Теперь ты сможешь носить Бульвинкля и Бульвинкля...
- 00:09:52,880 --> 00:09:56,130 ...или Роки и Роки, или мешать пары как угодно
- 00:09:56,180 --> 00:09:58,220 Хочешь - лося, хочешь - белку
- 00:09:58,260 --> 00:10:01,680 Кого захочешь
- 00:10:04,180 --> 00:10:09,440 Я возьму еще "эспрессо". Хочешь еще "латте"?
- 00:10:09,980 --> 00:10:15,650 Да нет. Дай бог с этим справиться
- 00:10:17,910 --> 00:10:18,950 И всё?!
- 00:10:18,990 --> 00:10:20,830 Да, это оказалось тяжело
- 00:10:20,870 --> 00:10:23,410 Ну да, объятие было таким страшным!
- 00:10:23,450 --> 00:10:26,250 Знаешь что? Тебя там не было!
- 00:10:28,080 --> 00:10:31,500 "Постирайка" Прачечная самообслуживания
- 00:10:37,630 --> 00:10:41,800 Дайте пройти! В сторонку, в сторонку!
- 00:10:45,180 --> 00:10:48,770 Извините! Эта машина была как бы моя
- 00:10:48,810 --> 00:10:52,400 Ага. А теперь она как бы не ваша
- 00:10:52,440 --> 00:10:55,530 Но я ее заняла. Поставила на нее корзину
- 00:10:55,570 --> 00:10:58,240 Ой, извините. Это ваша корзина?
- 00:10:58,280 --> 00:11:03,660 Какая красивая. К сожалению, я не вижу в машине загрузки!
- 00:11:03,830 --> 00:11:05,790 Что?
- 00:11:06,040 --> 00:11:11,080 Не загружена - не занята. Лады?
- 00:11:12,080 --> 00:11:13,710 Что здесь такое?
- 00:11:13,750 --> 00:11:17,760 Да ничего. Эта страшная баба заняла мою машину
- 00:11:17,800 --> 00:11:19,470 А наверху стояла твоя корзина?
- 00:11:19,510 --> 00:11:21,930 - Да, но не было загрузки. - Ну и?
- 00:11:21,970 --> 00:11:23,680 Ну, без загрузки - значит, не занято
- 00:11:23,720 --> 00:11:25,890 Без загрузки... Извини
- 00:11:25,930 --> 00:11:27,680 Секундочку!
- 00:11:27,730 --> 00:11:30,100 Это машина моей подруги
- 00:11:30,140 --> 00:11:32,520 Эй-эй-эй! Ее вещей не было внутри!
- 00:11:32,560 --> 00:11:39,150 Эй-эй-эй! Такого правила нет, сами знаете!
- 00:11:47,080 --> 00:11:50,370 Всё, спектакль окончен
- 00:11:51,580 --> 00:11:55,340 Глазеть больше не на что
- 00:11:57,000 --> 00:11:58,550 Теперь давай постираем
- 00:11:58,590 --> 00:12:02,590 Это было просто чудо! А я бы и суп назад не отослала
- 00:12:02,640 --> 00:12:08,970 Просто ты такая добрая, милая...
- 00:12:11,480 --> 00:12:14,900 Тебе понадобится порошок
- 00:12:17,320 --> 00:12:20,190 - Что это? - Юбервайсс!
- 00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:24,910 Новый. Немецкий. И очень крутой!
- 00:12:25,660 --> 00:12:29,200 Рэйч, а ты не разделяешь вещи?
- 00:12:29,250 --> 00:12:31,250 О боже
- 00:12:31,500 --> 00:12:34,080 Я что, полный профан в стирке?
- 00:12:34,130 --> 00:12:39,510 Неужели рубашки стирают в одной машине, а трусы в другой?
- 00:12:42,470 --> 00:12:44,800 Ты этого никогда раньше не делала?
- 00:12:44,840 --> 00:12:49,720 Сама - нет. Но я знаю людей, которые делали
- 00:12:49,770 --> 00:12:54,440 Ладно, ты меня поймал. Я в стирке девственница
- 00:12:54,480 --> 00:12:59,320 Ничего. Стирка в первый раз... это совсем не больно
- 00:13:02,280 --> 00:13:07,240 Значит так, в одной машине стирают белое
- 00:13:07,280 --> 00:13:09,740 А совсем в другой машине - цветное
- 00:13:09,790 --> 00:13:14,370 А в третьей стирают...
- 00:13:14,580 --> 00:13:17,460 ...деликатные вещи. То есть всякие лифчики...
- 00:13:17,500 --> 00:13:22,720 ...и прочее ниж... труси... ковые вещи
- 00:13:23,760 --> 00:13:26,140 Так. А вот, например, белые хабэшные трусы
- 00:13:26,180 --> 00:13:29,260 Их стирать как белое или как деликатное?
- 00:13:29,310 --> 00:13:33,480 Тут... случай сложный, решай сама
- 00:13:36,560 --> 00:13:39,900 Какой он симпатяга!
- 00:13:40,270 --> 00:13:42,190 Так где же вы, ребята, выросли?
- 00:13:42,230 --> 00:13:45,860 - На Бруклин Хайтс. - В Кливленде.
- 00:13:45,950 --> 00:13:47,870 - Как так получилось? - Боже мой!
- 00:13:48,120 --> 00:13:49,780 Что?
- 00:13:50,030 --> 00:13:52,500 Мне вдруг показалось, что я...
- 00:13:52,540 --> 00:13:55,500 ...падаю
- 00:13:55,540 --> 00:13:58,040 Но обошлось
- 00:14:07,010 --> 00:14:09,180 Так ты, в общем, с Анжелой?
- 00:14:09,430 --> 00:14:12,010 Ага. Типа того
- 00:14:12,060 --> 00:14:14,390 Повезло тебе
- 00:14:14,640 --> 00:14:16,890 Знаешь, по чем я больше всего в ней скучаю?
- 00:14:16,940 --> 00:14:20,360 Она так славно причмокивает, когда ест
- 00:14:20,400 --> 00:14:23,900 Как довольная маленькая белочка...
- 00:14:24,150 --> 00:14:27,200 ...или крыска
- 00:14:27,240 --> 00:14:28,820 Я даже и не замечал
- 00:14:28,860 --> 00:14:32,120 Да-да, ты прислушайся
- 00:14:32,160 --> 00:14:34,370 А Моника... Моника - чудо
- 00:14:34,410 --> 00:14:36,660 Да, точно
- 00:14:36,910 --> 00:14:40,630 Но это у нас ненадолго
- 00:14:40,790 --> 00:14:44,300 В кровати она для меня слишком
- 00:14:44,340 --> 00:14:46,880 В сексуальном плане
- 00:14:49,050 --> 00:14:52,140 Скажу тебе, Боб великолепен
- 00:14:52,180 --> 00:14:53,470 Ты заметила?
- 00:14:53,720 --> 00:14:56,810 Как хорошо быть с парнем умным, веселым...
- 00:14:56,850 --> 00:14:59,400 ...и с эмоциями не на уровне восьмилетнего пацана
- 00:14:59,440 --> 00:15:04,480 А еще, знаешь? Он - просто гигант в постели!
- 00:15:07,110 --> 00:15:12,740 А мой брат мне не рассказал даже о своем первом разе
- 00:15:13,330 --> 00:15:16,120 Как интересно
- 00:15:19,830 --> 00:15:23,000 Давай, ты сможешь. Это как повязку сдернуть
- 00:15:23,040 --> 00:15:27,260 Быстро дерни - и рана откроется
- 00:15:27,300 --> 00:15:30,340 Давай! Иди!
- 00:15:41,730 --> 00:15:44,360 Привет, Дженис
- 00:15:44,400 --> 00:15:48,320 Ну, все поехали - нам лучше будет расстаться
- 00:15:55,370 --> 00:15:58,290 Понятно
- 00:16:01,420 --> 00:16:03,750 Вот оно как
- 00:16:04,000 --> 00:16:07,170 Стоп, стоп, стоп
- 00:16:10,260 --> 00:16:13,430 Знаю, это прозвучит очень глупо...
- 00:16:13,680 --> 00:16:15,930 ...но я чувствую, что если смогу это...
- 00:16:16,180 --> 00:16:19,020 ...если я смогу сама себе стирать...
- 00:16:19,270 --> 00:16:21,850 ...то справлюсь и со всем остальным
- 00:16:22,100 --> 00:16:25,440 Это совсем даже не глупо
- 00:16:25,690 --> 00:16:29,820 Вот я... Когда я впервые сам готовил после ухода Кэрол...
- 00:16:30,070 --> 00:16:35,620 Извини, наше время вышло. В следующей серии "Росса"!..
- 00:16:35,740 --> 00:16:37,280 - О-о. - Что "о-о"?
- 00:16:38,660 --> 00:16:42,830 О-о, постиралось
- 00:16:43,080 --> 00:16:44,750 Это... это песня такая
- 00:16:45,000 --> 00:16:47,630 Такая себе прачечная песня
- 00:16:47,880 --> 00:16:51,970 О-о! ПостИралОсь!
- 00:16:52,220 --> 00:16:53,090 Росс, в чем дело?
- 00:16:53,340 --> 00:16:54,430 Ни в чем. Ни в чем
- 00:16:54,680 --> 00:16:56,220 Ля-ля, хорош стирать...
- 00:16:56,260 --> 00:16:57,560 Покажи мне
- 00:16:57,600 --> 00:17:03,230 Ты оставила красный носок в своем белом, и вот...
- 00:17:04,400 --> 00:17:08,020 ...теперь всё немного розовое
- 00:17:08,070 --> 00:17:09,650 Всё стало розовым?
- 00:17:09,690 --> 00:17:12,860 Кроме красного носка. Он остался красным
- 00:17:12,900 --> 00:17:15,610 Не страшно. Не беда. С каждым случается
- 00:17:15,660 --> 00:17:17,620 Не с каждым. А со мной!
- 00:17:17,780 --> 00:17:21,540 Господи, я вся буду как огромный зефир!
- 00:17:21,580 --> 00:17:23,620 Что я делаю? Что я делаю?
- 00:17:23,660 --> 00:17:27,000 Папа был прав! Я одна не проживу
- 00:17:27,040 --> 00:17:31,050 Я даже стирать не умею!
- 00:17:41,060 --> 00:17:43,140 Итак, с надувным Недопсом что-то случилось...
- 00:17:43,180 --> 00:17:46,690 ...ему почему-то не надули голову
- 00:17:46,730 --> 00:17:49,520 Такие дела, значит
- 00:17:49,570 --> 00:17:53,440 И его голова прохлопала по всему Бродвею
- 00:17:53,490 --> 00:17:55,530 Я себе и подумала:
- 00:17:55,780 --> 00:17:58,870 Какое неприглядное зрелище
- 00:17:58,910 --> 00:18:04,460 Что-то в глаз попало. Джои, посмотри на свет, будь любезен!
- 00:18:06,250 --> 00:18:07,880 - Господи! - Что?
- 00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:10,800 Аллё! За нашим столиком! Да такое...
- 00:18:10,840 --> 00:18:14,670 ...даже в шоу-бизнесе себе не позволяют
- 00:18:17,640 --> 00:18:18,680 Ну и что! Они просто близки
- 00:18:18,720 --> 00:18:22,560 Близки? Да ее язык у него в ухе!
- 00:18:22,600 --> 00:18:27,560 А типа ты никогда не баловалась с Россом
- 00:18:27,810 --> 00:18:32,320 Джои, это извращение. Это просто отвратительно...
- 00:18:32,360 --> 00:18:34,240 ...и это все неправда, да?
- 00:18:34,280 --> 00:18:36,150 Кто знает, что такое правда?
- 00:18:36,200 --> 00:18:37,490 Господи, чем ты думал?
- 00:18:37,530 --> 00:18:40,280 Ладно, мне самому стыдно, поняла?
- 00:18:40,320 --> 00:18:43,290 Ну, немножко
- 00:18:43,830 --> 00:18:45,870 - Я пошла! - Подожди, подожди! Ты чего?
- 00:18:45,910 --> 00:18:48,000 Тебе нужен он. Я хочу ее
- 00:18:48,040 --> 00:18:50,210 Он положил глаз на тебя
- 00:18:50,250 --> 00:18:52,130 - Правда? - Ну да.
- 00:18:52,380 --> 00:18:56,260 Слушай... Если объединить наши с тобой силы...
- 00:18:56,300 --> 00:18:59,930 ...мы их разведем
- 00:19:01,220 --> 00:19:03,640 Извини. Как же это так получилось!
- 00:19:03,890 --> 00:19:08,890 Ты так смешно рассказываешь о жизни великих людей!
- 00:19:13,690 --> 00:19:18,490 Официант! Еще тарелку куриных крылышек!
- 00:19:23,160 --> 00:19:25,830 Вот в чем все дело, Дженис. Мы разные
- 00:19:25,870 --> 00:19:29,080 Я типа "бим-бим-бим", а ты типа "бум-бум-бум"
- 00:19:29,330 --> 00:19:30,710 О господи!
- 00:19:30,960 --> 00:19:32,130 Извини, ради бога!
- 00:19:32,380 --> 00:19:34,710 Ты цела?
- 00:19:34,960 --> 00:19:37,550 Линза. Просто линза
- 00:19:37,800 --> 00:19:40,800 Я сейчас приду
- 00:19:41,640 --> 00:19:44,180 Я дал ей в глаз! Дал прямо в глаз!
- 00:19:44,220 --> 00:19:47,730 Это худший разрыв в истории человечества!
- 00:19:47,980 --> 00:19:51,270 Боже мой!
- 00:19:51,850 --> 00:19:53,310 Сколько их ты уже выпил?
- 00:19:53,560 --> 00:19:56,360 Не знаю. Миллион?
- 00:19:56,610 --> 00:20:02,450 Чендлер, спокойно, расслабься. Окажись в своем счастливом месте
- 00:20:03,410 --> 00:20:05,950 Порядок, порядок
- 00:20:05,990 --> 00:20:08,000 Непорядок. Она идет
- 00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:11,420 Жди здесь, ладно? Дыши
- 00:20:28,850 --> 00:20:30,390 Как это у тебя получается?
- 00:20:30,430 --> 00:20:34,020 Это у меня такой дар
- 00:20:35,150 --> 00:20:37,480 Нам надо всегда-всегда бросать кого-то вместе
- 00:20:37,730 --> 00:20:40,400 Какая хорошая мысль!
- 00:20:40,990 --> 00:20:44,280 Одежда теперь чистая - вот что главное
- 00:20:44,320 --> 00:20:49,250 Наверное. Только вся похожа на пижамы
- 00:20:53,790 --> 00:20:54,790 Не-ет, извините
- 00:20:55,040 --> 00:20:58,130 Прошу прощения, эта тележка была наша
- 00:20:58,170 --> 00:21:01,130 А у меня была талия 60 см. Мы всегда что-то теряем
- 00:21:01,170 --> 00:21:03,470 А теперь давай убирайся с дороги
- 00:21:03,720 --> 00:21:07,600 Извините, может, я плохо объяснила? Это была наша тележка
- 00:21:07,640 --> 00:21:09,810 Эй-эй-эй! В ней не было вещей!
- 00:21:09,850 --> 00:21:12,440 Эй-эй-эй! Хватит сочинять правила!
- 00:21:12,690 --> 00:21:16,310 Отпусти! Это моя тележка
- 00:21:16,310 --> 00:21:18,690 Слушай, корова - если хочешь тележку...
- 00:21:18,730 --> 00:21:22,820 ...тебе придется забрать с ней и меня!
- 00:21:28,580 --> 00:21:30,660 Ого! Ты это видел?
- 00:21:30,700 --> 00:21:31,870 Ты была неподражаема
- 00:21:32,120 --> 00:21:34,580 Родился новый человек, дамы и господа
- 00:21:34,830 --> 00:21:39,000 Спасибо тебе, без тебя я бы не справилась
- 00:21:42,630 --> 00:21:49,470 Так-так... А в сушилке ничего не осталось?
- 00:21:50,180 --> 00:21:53,850 Я в порядке, все нормально
- 00:21:55,890 --> 00:21:58,310 - Как ты? Точно все нормально? - Ага.
- 00:21:58,470 --> 00:22:02,020 - Все еще болит? - Ага.
- 00:22:03,100 --> 00:22:08,480 Идея - просто блеск! Вся одежда теперь подходит. Я тоже так сделаю
- 00:22:09,940 --> 00:22:11,150 Как все получилось?
- 00:22:11,190 --> 00:22:12,240 Отлично!
- 00:22:12,490 --> 00:22:17,740 Мы порвали обе пары и оставили куски себе
- 00:22:17,990 --> 00:22:20,870 Какая красивая история
- 00:22:21,830 --> 00:22:23,080 Кстати, я в полном порядке
- 00:22:23,330 --> 00:22:24,920 Ой, извини
- 00:22:25,170 --> 00:22:26,080 А где Чендлер?
- 00:22:26,330 --> 00:22:28,090 Ему нужно погоревать в одиночестве
- 00:22:28,340 --> 00:22:32,130 Я свободен! Я свободен!
- 00:22:32,670 --> 00:22:35,800 Наверное, уже отгоревал
- 00:22:37,930 --> 00:22:40,100 Перевод В.Бродового
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