Эпизод с сонограммой в конце
Описание
Кэрол, бывшая жена Росса, внезапно появляется у него на работе, чтобы сказать ему, что она беременна от него. Тем временем Моника в панике, так как её родители придут сегодня вечером поужинать, и она не хочет, чтобы они к ней придирались. В это время Рэйчел осознает, что потеряла обручальное кольцо Барри. Она и друзья начинают в панике искать его, так как вечером она встречается Барри, чтобы вернуть ему это кольцо. Рэйчел вспоминает, что могла обронить кольцо в лазанью. Моника расстроена, поскольку это была единственная работа, которую она доверила Рэйчел, и теперь обед для её родителей испорчен. Росс приходит и рассказывает всем, что Кэррол беременна, а Фиби находит обручальное кольцо в лазанье. Росс говорит, что Кэррол и её партнёрша Сьюзен хотят, чтобы он участвовал в воспитании, но только если он сам этого захочет. Кэррол и Сьюзен пригласили его завтра на свою первую сонограмму, а он понятия не имеет, что он собирается делать: он все ещё обдумывает тот факт, что он станет отцом, и не знает как можно воспитывать ребёнка с двумя лесбиянками. Во время ужина с родителями Моника подвергается очередной атаке критики от своей матери. Моника решает перевести внимание на проблемы Росса. В конце концов он рассказывает, что у Кэррол будет ребёнок. В Центральной кофейне Рэйчел и Росс говорят о Барри и Кэррол, и Рейчел просит совета у Росса как не расстроить Барри, а позже спрашивает «когда жизнь стала такой сложной?». Росс мечтательно смотрит на Рэйчел. Позже Росс идет в клинику, чтобы увидеться с Кэррол, а Рейчел идет к Барри, что бы отдать ему кольцо. Росс обсуждает с Кэрол и Сьюзан имя малыша и в ужасе узнает, что его ребёнок не будет носить его фамилию. Росс понимает, что он не готов участвовать во всем этом и пытается уйти, но когда появляется сонограмма с малышом, все трое счастливы. Вернувшись в стоматологический кабинет Барри, Рэйчел узнает, что Барри отправился в их медовый месяц на Арубу с Минди, лучшей подругой Рэйчел. Рейчел расстроена. В квартире Моники и Рэйчел собрались все друзья. Росс приносит копию сонограммы, и вся банда её рассматривает. Рейчел разговаривает по телефону с Минди. Она заканчивает разговор, тем, что желает им детей с волосами Барри и настоящим носом Минди.
Субтитры
- 00:00:02,877 --> 00:00:04,294 What you guys don't understand is...
- 00:00:04,504 --> 00:00:07,548 ...for us, kissing is as important as any part of it.
- 00:00:07,924 --> 00:00:09,508 Yeah, right.
- 00:00:11,970 --> 00:00:13,095 You serious?
- 00:00:14,139 --> 00:00:15,097 Oh, yeah.
- 00:00:15,306 --> 00:00:17,683 Everything you need to know is in that first kiss.
- 00:00:17,892 --> 00:00:19,768 - Absolutely. - Yeah, I think, for us...
- 00:00:19,978 --> 00:00:22,021 ...kissing is pretty much like an opening act.
- 00:00:22,230 --> 00:00:24,773 I mean, it's like the stand-up comedian you have to sit through...
- 00:00:24,983 --> 00:00:27,109 ...before Pink Floyd comes out.
- 00:00:30,363 --> 00:00:33,699 Yeah, and it's not that we don't like the comedian.
- 00:00:33,908 --> 00:00:37,077 It's just that that's not...
- 00:00:37,287 --> 00:00:39,288 ...why we bought the ticket.
- 00:00:40,707 --> 00:00:42,207 See, the problem is, though...
- 00:00:42,417 --> 00:00:45,002 ...after the concert's over, no matter how great the show was...
- 00:00:45,211 --> 00:00:48,672 ...you girls are always looking for the comedian again.
- 00:00:48,882 --> 00:00:50,883 I mean, we're in the car, we're fighting traffic...
- 00:00:51,092 --> 00:00:53,844 ...basically just trying to stay awake.
- 00:00:55,889 --> 00:00:58,932 Yeah, well, word of advice: Bring back the comedian.
- 00:00:59,142 --> 00:01:00,893 Otherwise, you're gonna find yourself...
- 00:01:01,102 --> 00:01:03,687 ...sitting at home listening to that album alone.
- 00:01:08,443 --> 00:01:10,778 Are we still talking about sex?
- 00:02:05,333 --> 00:02:07,209 ROSS: No, it's good. It is good.
- 00:02:07,418 --> 00:02:11,088 It's just that, doesn't she seem a little angry?
- 00:02:11,297 --> 00:02:13,006 Well, she has issues.
- 00:02:14,717 --> 00:02:16,218 Does she?
- 00:02:16,427 --> 00:02:18,637 He's out banging other women over the head with a club...
- 00:02:18,847 --> 00:02:22,683 ...while she sits at home trying to get the mastodon smell out of the carpet.
- 00:02:22,934 --> 00:02:25,978 Marsha, see, these are cave people.
- 00:02:27,021 --> 00:02:29,356 Okay, they have issues like:
- 00:02:29,566 --> 00:02:33,569 "Gee, that glacier's getting kind of close." See?
- 00:02:33,778 --> 00:02:35,863 Speaking of issues, isn't that your ex-wife?
- 00:02:36,072 --> 00:02:38,740 - No, no. - Yes, it is. Carol, hi.
- 00:02:38,950 --> 00:02:40,492 ROSS: Okay. Yes. Yes, it is.
- 00:02:40,702 --> 00:02:43,078 How about I'll catch up with you in the Ice Age?
- 00:02:57,969 --> 00:02:59,761 - Hi. - Hi.
- 00:03:06,936 --> 00:03:08,520 So...
- 00:03:09,355 --> 00:03:11,190 You look great.
- 00:03:11,983 --> 00:03:13,066 I hate that.
- 00:03:14,068 --> 00:03:17,362 Sorry. Thanks. You look good too.
- 00:03:17,572 --> 00:03:20,490 Well, you know, in here, anyone who...
- 00:03:22,076 --> 00:03:23,327 ...stands erect...
- 00:03:26,748 --> 00:03:28,624 - So, what's new? Still a... - A lesbian?
- 00:03:28,833 --> 00:03:30,417 Well...
- 00:03:31,502 --> 00:03:32,961 You never know.
- 00:03:33,171 --> 00:03:35,214 How's, um...? How's the family?
- 00:03:35,715 --> 00:03:37,799 Marty's still totally paranoid.
- 00:03:38,009 --> 00:03:41,094 - Oh, and... - Carol, why are you here, Carol?
- 00:03:42,513 --> 00:03:45,224 - I'm pregnant. - Pregnant.
- 00:03:52,857 --> 00:03:56,235 Oh. Looks like she didn't leave in such a hurry after all.
- 00:03:56,611 --> 00:03:58,695 I think this is the episode of Three's Company...
- 00:03:58,905 --> 00:04:01,198 ...where's there's some kind of misunderstanding.
- 00:04:04,118 --> 00:04:06,536 Then I've already seen this one.
- 00:04:08,081 --> 00:04:09,998 Are you through with that? Thanks.
- 00:04:10,208 --> 00:04:12,626 Yeah, sorry, the swallowing slowed me down.
- 00:04:14,128 --> 00:04:15,921 Whose little ball of paper is this?
- 00:04:16,130 --> 00:04:17,172 Oh, that would be mine.
- 00:04:17,382 --> 00:04:19,841 See, I wrote a note to myself, then I didn't need it.
- 00:04:20,051 --> 00:04:22,261 So I balled it up and now I wish I was dead.
- 00:04:22,470 --> 00:04:23,720 [SCOFFS]
- 00:04:24,847 --> 00:04:27,724 She already fluffed that pillow. Monica, you know, you already fluffed...
- 00:04:27,934 --> 00:04:29,768 But it's fine.
- 00:04:30,228 --> 00:04:31,186 Look, I'm sorry.
- 00:04:31,396 --> 00:04:33,855 I don't want to give them any more ammunition than they have.
- 00:04:34,065 --> 00:04:35,941 Yes, we know how cruel a parent can be...
- 00:04:36,150 --> 00:04:39,278 ...about the flatness of a child's pillow.
- 00:04:39,821 --> 00:04:42,281 Monica? Hi. Um...
- 00:04:42,865 --> 00:04:45,325 Monica, um, you're scaring me.
- 00:04:46,661 --> 00:04:50,247 I mean, you're, like, all chaotic and twirly, you know?
- 00:04:50,456 --> 00:04:51,665 Not in a good way.
- 00:04:53,543 --> 00:04:54,710 Yeah, calm down.
- 00:04:54,919 --> 00:04:59,214 You don't see Ross getting all chaotic and twirly every time they come.
- 00:04:59,424 --> 00:05:03,302 That's because, as far as my parents are concerned, Ross can do no wrong.
- 00:05:03,511 --> 00:05:05,554 You see, he's the prince.
- 00:05:05,763 --> 00:05:09,141 Apparently they had some big ceremony before I was born.
- 00:05:10,893 --> 00:05:12,561 Ew, ew, ew.
- 00:05:12,812 --> 00:05:15,439 - What? - Ugly Naked Guy got a ThighMaster.
- 00:05:18,067 --> 00:05:19,526 Ew.
- 00:05:20,528 --> 00:05:23,322 - Has anybody seen my engagement ring? - Yeah, it's beautiful.
- 00:05:28,870 --> 00:05:30,370 Oh, God. Oh, God.
- 00:05:30,580 --> 00:05:34,041 - Oh, God, oh, God, oh, God. - No, don't touch that.
- 00:05:36,461 --> 00:05:40,714 Oh, like I wasn't dreading tomorrow enough having to give it back to him.
- 00:05:40,965 --> 00:05:42,716 "Hi, Barry, remember me? I'm the girl...
- 00:05:42,925 --> 00:05:46,094 ...that stomped on your heart in front of your entire family"
- 00:05:46,304 --> 00:05:49,639 Oh, God. Now I'm gonna have to return the ring, without the ring...
- 00:05:49,849 --> 00:05:52,726 ...which makes it so much harder.
- 00:05:53,603 --> 00:05:55,562 Easy, Rach, we'll find it. Won't we?
- 00:05:55,772 --> 00:05:57,481 - Oh, yeah. MONICA: Okay, look.
- 00:06:00,151 --> 00:06:01,693 When did you have it on last?
- 00:06:01,903 --> 00:06:04,237 Doy. Probably right before she lost it.
- 00:06:06,574 --> 00:06:09,242 You don't get a lot of "doy" these days.
- 00:06:10,870 --> 00:06:13,705 I know I had it this morning.
- 00:06:13,915 --> 00:06:16,792 I know I had it when I was in the kitchen with...
- 00:06:17,001 --> 00:06:18,627 Dinah?
- 00:06:21,297 --> 00:06:24,049 Oh, don't be mad.
- 00:06:24,467 --> 00:06:26,885 - You didn't. - Oh, I'm sorry.
- 00:06:27,095 --> 00:06:29,388 I gave you one job.
- 00:06:30,598 --> 00:06:33,683 Oh, but look how straight those noodles are.
- 00:06:34,477 --> 00:06:38,522 Monica, you know that's not how you look for an engagement ring in a lasagna.
- 00:06:41,025 --> 00:06:42,609 I just can't do it.
- 00:06:43,861 --> 00:06:45,153 Boys?
- 00:06:46,030 --> 00:06:47,697 We're going in.
- 00:06:51,828 --> 00:06:53,245 [KNOCKING ON DOOR]
- 00:06:56,040 --> 00:06:57,416 Hi.
- 00:06:58,334 --> 00:07:00,544 Oh, that is not a happy "hi."
- 00:07:00,753 --> 00:07:02,254 Carol's pregnant.
- 00:07:02,463 --> 00:07:04,047 Oh, I found it.
- 00:07:06,217 --> 00:07:09,302 Well, what...? What?
- 00:07:09,720 --> 00:07:11,054 Yeah.
- 00:07:12,014 --> 00:07:13,348 Do that for another two hours...
- 00:07:13,558 --> 00:07:16,560 ...you might be where I am right about now.
- 00:07:17,603 --> 00:07:20,814 Kind of puts that whole pillow thing in perspective, huh, Mon?
- 00:07:23,151 --> 00:07:25,152 Well, now, how do you fit into this whole thing?
- 00:07:25,361 --> 00:07:28,447 Well, Carol says she and Susan want me to be involved.
- 00:07:28,656 --> 00:07:33,285 But if I'm not comfortable with it, I don't have to be involved.
- 00:07:33,578 --> 00:07:35,495 Basically, it's totally up to me.
- 00:07:35,705 --> 00:07:37,914 She is so great. I miss her.
- 00:07:43,171 --> 00:07:44,546 What does she mean by "involved"?
- 00:07:44,755 --> 00:07:47,340 I mean, presumably, the biggest part of your job is done.
- 00:07:49,594 --> 00:07:52,179 Anyway, they want me to go down to this...
- 00:07:52,388 --> 00:07:54,806 ...sonogram thing with them tomorrow.
- 00:07:55,016 --> 00:07:56,057 So, what are you gonna do?
- 00:07:56,267 --> 00:07:58,310 I have no idea.
- 00:07:58,519 --> 00:08:02,147 No matter what I do, though, I'm still gonna be a father.
- 00:08:02,523 --> 00:08:04,274 [JOEY CLANGING UTENSILS]
- 00:08:12,241 --> 00:08:13,909 Well, this is still ruined, right?
- 00:08:19,832 --> 00:08:23,835 Oh. Martha Lugwin's daughter is gonna call you.
- 00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:28,381 Mm. What's that curry taste?
- 00:08:28,841 --> 00:08:30,133 Curry.
- 00:08:31,344 --> 00:08:32,802 Mm.
- 00:08:34,472 --> 00:08:37,557 I think they're great. I really do.
- 00:08:37,767 --> 00:08:38,725 You remember the Lugwins?
- 00:08:38,935 --> 00:08:40,810 The big one had a thing for you, didn't she?
- 00:08:41,020 --> 00:08:42,771 They all had a thing for him.
- 00:08:43,648 --> 00:08:44,731 Oh, Mom.
- 00:08:44,941 --> 00:08:47,025 I'm sorry. Why is this girl going to call me?
- 00:08:47,235 --> 00:08:51,738 Oh, she just graduated, and she wants to be something in cooking or food...
- 00:08:51,948 --> 00:08:53,073 ...or I don't know.
- 00:08:53,282 --> 00:08:55,659 Anyway, I told her you had a restaurant, so...
- 00:08:55,868 --> 00:08:58,537 No, Mom. I don't have a restaurant. I work in a restaurant.
- 00:08:58,746 --> 00:09:01,414 Well, they don't have to know that.
- 00:09:04,669 --> 00:09:06,962 Ross, could you come and help me with the spaghetti.
- 00:09:07,171 --> 00:09:08,129 Yes.
- 00:09:08,339 --> 00:09:10,590 Oh, we're having spaghetti. That's...
- 00:09:10,800 --> 00:09:12,259 ...easy.
- 00:09:14,262 --> 00:09:17,347 I know this is going to sound unbelievably selfish on my part...
- 00:09:17,557 --> 00:09:20,767 ...but were you planning on bringing up the whole baby/lesbian thing?
- 00:09:20,977 --> 00:09:23,687 Because I think it might take some of the heat off me.
- 00:09:26,816 --> 00:09:30,652 What that Rachel did to her life. We ran into her parents at the club.
- 00:09:30,861 --> 00:09:32,821 They were not playing very well.
- 00:09:33,030 --> 00:09:35,282 I'm not gonna tell you what they spent on that wedding...
- 00:09:35,658 --> 00:09:38,034 ...but $40,000 is a lot of money.
- 00:09:40,997 --> 00:09:44,666 Well, at least she had the chance to leave a man at the altar.
- 00:09:47,837 --> 00:09:50,589 - What's that supposed to mean? - Nothing.
- 00:09:50,798 --> 00:09:54,092 - It's an expression. - No, it's not.
- 00:09:54,302 --> 00:09:55,468 Don't listen to your mother.
- 00:09:55,678 --> 00:09:57,637 You're independent and you always have been.
- 00:09:57,847 --> 00:10:00,307 Even when you were a kid, and you were chubby...
- 00:10:00,516 --> 00:10:03,351 ...and you had no friends, you were just fine.
- 00:10:05,146 --> 00:10:08,273 You'd read alone in your room. And your puzzles...
- 00:10:11,819 --> 00:10:15,780 Look, there are people, like Ross, who need to shoot for the stars.
- 00:10:15,990 --> 00:10:18,825 With his museum and his papers getting published.
- 00:10:19,035 --> 00:10:21,286 Other people are satisfied with staying where they are.
- 00:10:21,495 --> 00:10:25,165 I'm telling you, these are the people who never get cancer.
- 00:10:28,085 --> 00:10:32,213 And I read about these women trying to have it all, and I thank God...
- 00:10:32,423 --> 00:10:35,425 ...our little Harmonica doesn't seem to have that problem.
- 00:10:38,137 --> 00:10:40,847 So, Ross, what's going on with you?
- 00:10:41,891 --> 00:10:45,977 Any stories? No news, no little anecdotes to share with the folks?
- 00:10:46,187 --> 00:10:47,270 Okay, okay.
- 00:10:49,273 --> 00:10:54,027 Ahem. Look, I, uh... I realize you guys have been wondering...
- 00:10:54,236 --> 00:10:56,863 ...what exactly happened between Carol and me.
- 00:10:57,073 --> 00:10:58,865 And so, well, here's the deal.
- 00:11:01,911 --> 00:11:03,370 Carol's a lesbian.
- 00:11:05,623 --> 00:11:07,874 She's living with a woman named Susan.
- 00:11:09,835 --> 00:11:12,921 She's pregnant with my child.
- 00:11:13,464 --> 00:11:16,466 And she and Susan are going to raise the baby.
- 00:11:20,680 --> 00:11:22,180 And you knew about this?
- 00:11:36,904 --> 00:11:38,655 Your folks are really that bad, huh?
- 00:11:39,782 --> 00:11:42,325 Well, you know, these people are pros.
- 00:11:44,620 --> 00:11:47,163 They know what they're doing. They take their time.
- 00:11:47,373 --> 00:11:50,041 They get the job done.
- 00:11:51,836 --> 00:11:55,004 Boy, I know they say that you can't change your parents.
- 00:11:55,214 --> 00:11:58,341 Boy, if you could, I'd want yours.
- 00:12:00,302 --> 00:12:01,928 Must pee.
- 00:12:03,013 --> 00:12:04,764 You know, it's even worse when you're twins.
- 00:12:04,974 --> 00:12:07,142 - You're a twin? - Oh, yeah. We don't speak.
- 00:12:07,351 --> 00:12:10,145 She's like this high-powered, driven, career-type.
- 00:12:10,479 --> 00:12:12,313 - What does she do? - She's a waitress.
- 00:12:14,567 --> 00:12:17,527 All right. You guys, I kind of gotta clean up now.
- 00:12:17,737 --> 00:12:20,613 Chandler, you're an only child, right? You don't have any of this.
- 00:12:20,823 --> 00:12:24,159 Well, no, although I did have an imaginary friend...
- 00:12:24,368 --> 00:12:26,244 ...who my parents actually preferred.
- 00:12:28,539 --> 00:12:30,582 RACHEL: Hit the lights, please.
- 00:12:37,506 --> 00:12:38,923 How long was I in there?
- 00:12:40,718 --> 00:12:41,885 I'm just cleaning up.
- 00:12:42,636 --> 00:12:45,472 Oh, do you, uh...? Do you need any help?
- 00:12:45,681 --> 00:12:48,349 Um, okay, sure. Thanks.
- 00:12:49,977 --> 00:12:51,060 [SIGHS]
- 00:12:54,231 --> 00:12:55,690 Anyway...
- 00:12:56,358 --> 00:12:59,194 So you nervous about Barry tomorrow?
- 00:12:59,403 --> 00:13:02,155 - Oh, a little. - Mm-hm.
- 00:13:03,282 --> 00:13:05,200 - A lot. - Mm-hm.
- 00:13:05,910 --> 00:13:08,453 So got any advice?
- 00:13:08,662 --> 00:13:11,748 You know, as someone who's recently been dumped.
- 00:13:13,000 --> 00:13:16,461 Well, you may want to steer clear of the word "dumped."
- 00:13:17,880 --> 00:13:22,091 Chances are he's going to be this broken shell of a man. You know?
- 00:13:22,301 --> 00:13:26,346 So you should try not to look too terrific. I know it'll be hard.
- 00:13:29,850 --> 00:13:34,229 Or, you know, hey, I'll go down there, and I'll give Barry back his ring.
- 00:13:34,438 --> 00:13:38,775 And you can go with Carol and Susan to the OB-GYN.
- 00:13:41,028 --> 00:13:43,488 You've got Carol tomorrow.
- 00:13:44,323 --> 00:13:46,282 When did it get so complicated?
- 00:13:46,492 --> 00:13:47,784 Got me.
- 00:13:48,452 --> 00:13:51,079 - Remember when we were in high school? - Yeah.
- 00:13:51,288 --> 00:13:53,790 I mean, didn't you think you' were gonna meet someone...
- 00:13:53,999 --> 00:13:56,543 ...fall in love, and that'd be it?
- 00:13:58,462 --> 00:13:59,712 [SCOFFS]
- 00:14:01,590 --> 00:14:03,508 - Ross? - Yes, yes.
- 00:14:05,135 --> 00:14:08,805 Oh. Man. I never thought I'd be here.
- 00:14:09,014 --> 00:14:10,557 [ROSS CHUCKLES]
- 00:14:16,730 --> 00:14:18,398 Me neither.
- 00:14:35,624 --> 00:14:37,876 Hi. Sorry I'm late. I got stuck at work.
- 00:14:38,085 --> 00:14:41,546 There was this big dinosaur thing. Anyway...
- 00:14:42,631 --> 00:14:44,173 Hi.
- 00:14:44,758 --> 00:14:47,886 - Ross, you remember Susan. - How could I forget?
- 00:14:48,095 --> 00:14:49,262 Ross.
- 00:14:49,471 --> 00:14:52,098 Hello, Susan. Good shake, good shake.
- 00:14:54,018 --> 00:14:56,728 So, uh, we're just waiting for?
- 00:14:56,937 --> 00:14:59,230 - Dr. Oberman. - Dr. Oberman. Okay, and is he...?
- 00:14:59,440 --> 00:15:01,983 - She. - Of course, "she."
- 00:15:02,776 --> 00:15:07,196 She, uh, familiar with our special situation?
- 00:15:07,406 --> 00:15:09,240 Yes, and she's very supportive.
- 00:15:09,450 --> 00:15:11,534 Great. Okay, that's great. Heh.
- 00:15:13,162 --> 00:15:14,704 No, I'm...
- 00:15:15,706 --> 00:15:17,165 CAROL: Thanks.
- 00:15:31,680 --> 00:15:32,889 Quack, quack...
- 00:15:33,098 --> 00:15:35,099 ...quack, quack, quack.
- 00:15:35,309 --> 00:15:36,976 Ross?
- 00:15:37,311 --> 00:15:38,937 That opens my cervix.
- 00:15:45,778 --> 00:15:48,279 - Barry? BARRY: Come on in.
- 00:15:48,489 --> 00:15:49,447 Are you sure?
- 00:15:49,657 --> 00:15:52,116 BARRY: It's fine, it's fine. Robbie's gonna be here for hours.
- 00:15:52,326 --> 00:15:53,493 Huh?
- 00:15:56,705 --> 00:15:58,414 So how are you doing?
- 00:15:59,583 --> 00:16:01,250 I'm...
- 00:16:01,919 --> 00:16:03,753 I'm okay.
- 00:16:04,630 --> 00:16:05,797 You look great.
- 00:16:06,215 --> 00:16:07,256 Yeah, well...
- 00:16:08,008 --> 00:16:10,635 RECEPTIONIST [OVER SPEAKER]: Dr. Farber, Jason Greenspan's gagging.
- 00:16:10,844 --> 00:16:13,596 Be right there. I'll be back in a second.
- 00:16:18,686 --> 00:16:20,186 I dumped him.
- 00:16:21,522 --> 00:16:22,814 Okay.
- 00:16:31,365 --> 00:16:32,573 Oh!
- 00:16:37,496 --> 00:16:42,125 - Ross. - So, um...? So how's this going to work...
- 00:16:42,334 --> 00:16:43,918 ...ahem, you know, with us?
- 00:16:44,128 --> 00:16:47,046 You know, when, like, important decisions have to be made?
- 00:16:47,423 --> 00:16:48,715 Give me a "for instance."
- 00:16:48,924 --> 00:16:50,591 Well, I don't know. Okay, okay.
- 00:16:50,801 --> 00:16:53,136 - How about with the baby's name? - Marlon...
- 00:16:53,345 --> 00:16:57,181 - Marlon. ...if it's a boy. Minnie, if it's a girl.
- 00:16:59,268 --> 00:17:00,893 As in "Mouse"?
- 00:17:02,438 --> 00:17:03,813 As in my grandmother.
- 00:17:04,690 --> 00:17:07,734 Still, you say "Minnie," you hear "Mouse."
- 00:17:09,820 --> 00:17:11,404 How about, um...
- 00:17:12,072 --> 00:17:13,489 How about "Julia"?
- 00:17:14,366 --> 00:17:15,408 Julia.
- 00:17:15,617 --> 00:17:16,784 We agreed on Minnie.
- 00:17:16,994 --> 00:17:19,746 It's funny, um, we agreed we'd spend our lives together.
- 00:17:19,997 --> 00:17:22,790 Things change. Roll with the punches.
- 00:17:23,333 --> 00:17:25,251 I believe Julia's on the table.
- 00:17:27,337 --> 00:17:29,714 Oh. Sorry about that.
- 00:17:32,926 --> 00:17:35,344 So, what have you been up to?
- 00:17:35,554 --> 00:17:38,389 Oh. Not much.
- 00:17:38,599 --> 00:17:41,392 - I got a job. - Hey, that's great.
- 00:17:42,519 --> 00:17:43,936 Why are you so tan?
- 00:17:45,022 --> 00:17:46,189 Oh, I, uh...
- 00:17:46,899 --> 00:17:48,649 I went to Aruba.
- 00:17:48,984 --> 00:17:51,778 Oh, no. You went on our honeymoon alone?
- 00:17:51,987 --> 00:17:53,488 No.
- 00:17:55,407 --> 00:17:58,493 See, uh, I went with...
- 00:17:59,953 --> 00:18:01,412 - Now, this may hurt. - Me?
- 00:18:01,622 --> 00:18:02,872 No.
- 00:18:05,876 --> 00:18:06,959 I went with Mindy.
- 00:18:07,836 --> 00:18:09,462 Mindy?
- 00:18:10,047 --> 00:18:11,714 My maid of honor, Mindy?
- 00:18:11,924 --> 00:18:14,592 Yeah, well, we're kind of a thing now.
- 00:18:14,802 --> 00:18:16,052 [CHUCKLES]
- 00:18:16,470 --> 00:18:18,012 Well, I'm...
- 00:18:19,139 --> 00:18:20,973 You got plugs.
- 00:18:21,183 --> 00:18:24,018 Careful, careful. They haven't quite taken yet.
- 00:18:24,645 --> 00:18:26,979 And you got lenses.
- 00:18:27,231 --> 00:18:29,899 But you hate sticking your finger in your eye.
- 00:18:30,109 --> 00:18:31,818 Not for her.
- 00:18:32,903 --> 00:18:34,070 Oh.
- 00:18:35,697 --> 00:18:38,074 Listen, I really wanted to thank you.
- 00:18:38,742 --> 00:18:40,159 Okay.
- 00:18:41,078 --> 00:18:42,995 About a month ago, I wanted to hurt you...
- 00:18:43,413 --> 00:18:45,790 ...more than I've ever wanted to hurt anyone in my life.
- 00:18:45,999 --> 00:18:47,416 And I'm an orthodontist.
- 00:18:48,210 --> 00:18:49,710 Wow.
- 00:18:49,920 --> 00:18:53,506 You know, you were right. I mean, I thought we were happy.
- 00:18:53,715 --> 00:18:54,757 We weren't happy.
- 00:18:56,426 --> 00:18:58,261 But with Mindy...
- 00:18:59,138 --> 00:19:00,847 ...now I'm happy.
- 00:19:02,182 --> 00:19:03,307 - Spit. - What?
- 00:19:03,517 --> 00:19:05,268 Me.
- 00:19:07,104 --> 00:19:09,480 Anyway, um...
- 00:19:10,482 --> 00:19:13,860 I guess, uh... I guess this belongs to you.
- 00:19:15,028 --> 00:19:17,488 And thank you for giving it to me.
- 00:19:18,115 --> 00:19:20,533 Well, thank you for giving it back.
- 00:19:24,037 --> 00:19:25,746 Hello.
- 00:19:29,042 --> 00:19:31,085 Oh, please. What's wrong with Helen?
- 00:19:31,295 --> 00:19:32,420 Helen Geller?
- 00:19:33,797 --> 00:19:37,216 - I don't think so. - Hello, it's not gonna be Helen Geller.
- 00:19:37,426 --> 00:19:38,801 Thank you.
- 00:19:39,011 --> 00:19:40,761 No. I mean, it's not Geller.
- 00:19:41,597 --> 00:19:43,055 What, it's gonna be Helen Willick?
- 00:19:43,765 --> 00:19:48,936 No, actually, um, we talked about Helen Willick Bunch.
- 00:19:50,147 --> 00:19:52,773 Well, wait a minute. Why is she in the title?
- 00:19:52,983 --> 00:19:54,358 Because it's my baby too.
- 00:19:54,568 --> 00:19:57,862 That's funny. Really? I don't remember you making any sperm.
- 00:20:00,574 --> 00:20:03,159 And we all know what a challenge that is.
- 00:20:03,368 --> 00:20:05,203 - Uh-huh. See? - All right, you two, stop it.
- 00:20:05,412 --> 00:20:07,747 No, no. She gets a credit. Hey, I'm in there too.
- 00:20:07,956 --> 00:20:11,918 Honestly. You're not actually suggesting Helen Willick Bunch Geller.
- 00:20:12,127 --> 00:20:13,711 I think that borders on child abuse.
- 00:20:13,921 --> 00:20:17,715 Of course not. I'm suggesting Geller Willick Bunch.
- 00:20:17,925 --> 00:20:20,384 Oh, no. No, no, no. You see what he's doing?
- 00:20:20,594 --> 00:20:22,428 He knows no one is gonna say all those names.
- 00:20:22,638 --> 00:20:25,264 He knows they'll wind up calling her Geller. Then he gets his way.
- 00:20:25,474 --> 00:20:27,683 My way? You think this is my way?
- 00:20:27,893 --> 00:20:31,437 Believe me, of all the ways I ever imagined this moment in my life being...
- 00:20:31,647 --> 00:20:34,857 ...this is not my way. You know what? This is too hard.
- 00:20:35,067 --> 00:20:38,069 Knock, knock. How are we today? Any nausea?
- 00:20:38,278 --> 00:20:40,154 - A little. - Just a little.
- 00:20:41,949 --> 00:20:46,577 Well, I was just wondering about the mother-to-be, but, uh, thanks for sharing.
- 00:20:46,787 --> 00:20:47,870 Uh, lie back.
- 00:20:48,664 --> 00:20:50,289 You know what? I'm gonna go.
- 00:20:50,499 --> 00:20:54,502 Um, I don't think I can be involved in this particular family thing.
- 00:20:54,711 --> 00:20:56,754 [BABY'S HEART BEATING OVER SONOGRAM]
- 00:21:05,931 --> 00:21:07,348 Oh, my God.
- 00:21:07,557 --> 00:21:08,641 Look at that.
- 00:21:08,850 --> 00:21:10,309 I know.
- 00:21:21,071 --> 00:21:23,364 Well, isn't that amazing?
- 00:21:26,785 --> 00:21:28,494 What are we supposed to be seeing here?
- 00:21:30,330 --> 00:21:34,208 I don't know, but I think it's about to attack the Enterprise.
- 00:21:38,255 --> 00:21:41,173 You know, if you tilt your head to the left and relax your eyes...
- 00:21:41,383 --> 00:21:43,634 ...it kind of looks like an old potato.
- 00:21:44,761 --> 00:21:47,054 Then don't do that, all right?
- 00:21:49,224 --> 00:21:50,474 Monica?
- 00:21:50,684 --> 00:21:52,226 What do you think?
- 00:21:52,436 --> 00:21:53,894 Mm-hm.
- 00:21:55,063 --> 00:21:56,522 Are you welling up?
- 00:21:56,732 --> 00:21:57,982 - No. - You are.
- 00:21:58,191 --> 00:22:00,443 - You are. You're welling up. - No, I'm not.
- 00:22:00,652 --> 00:22:03,779 - You're gonna be an aunt. - Oh, shut up.
- 00:22:04,948 --> 00:22:06,407 Hi, Mindy.
- 00:22:06,616 --> 00:22:08,701 Hi, it's Rachel.
- 00:22:08,910 --> 00:22:12,705 Yeah, I'm fine. I saw Barry today.
- 00:22:12,914 --> 00:22:14,582 Oh, yeah, yeah, he told me.
- 00:22:14,791 --> 00:22:17,501 No, it's okay. Really, it's okay.
- 00:22:17,711 --> 00:22:21,380 I hope you two are very happy. I really do.
- 00:22:21,590 --> 00:22:24,759 And, Min, you know, if everything works out...
- 00:22:24,968 --> 00:22:29,096 ...and you guys end up getting married and having kids and everything...
- 00:22:29,306 --> 00:22:32,683 ...I just hope they have his old hairline and your old nose.
- 00:22:37,731 --> 00:22:40,983 Okay, I know it was a cheap shot, but I feel so much better now.
- 00:22:46,990 --> 00:22:48,991 [English - US - SDH]
- 00:00:02,870 --> 00:00:04,370 Вы, мужики, не понимаете
- 00:00:04,620 --> 00:00:07,450 Для нас поцелуй так же важен, как и все остальное
- 00:00:07,710 --> 00:00:10,750 Ну да, конечно!
- 00:00:11,960 --> 00:00:13,880 Что, серьезно?
- 00:00:14,130 --> 00:00:15,050 Еще бы!
- 00:00:15,300 --> 00:00:17,720 В первом поцелуе заключено все главное
- 00:00:17,970 --> 00:00:18,720 Именно
- 00:00:18,970 --> 00:00:21,470 А для нас поцелуй - это вроде ключа к замку.
- 00:00:21,720 --> 00:00:24,810 Типа говоришь "Сезам, откройся"...
- 00:00:25,060 --> 00:00:28,600 ...и открывается пещера чудес.
- 00:00:30,390 --> 00:00:33,560 Ну, крикнул ты этот "Сезам" один раз.
- 00:00:33,810 --> 00:00:36,030 Главные-то дела все равно...
- 00:00:36,280 --> 00:00:39,820 ...будут твориться в пещере
- 00:00:40,740 --> 00:00:44,990 Проблема в том, что после сказочного похода в пещеру...
- 00:00:45,240 --> 00:00:48,750 ...вам, девчонкам, опять нужны эти "Сезамы"
- 00:00:49,000 --> 00:00:52,080 А мы сидим в машине, пробираемся через пробки...
- 00:00:52,330 --> 00:00:55,380 ...и вообще пытаемся не заснуть
- 00:00:55,920 --> 00:00:58,760 Ну так вот вам совет: не забывайте про "Сезам"
- 00:00:59,010 --> 00:01:05,180 А то в следующий раз будете строить пещеры чудес собственными руками
- 00:01:08,430 --> 00:01:11,770 Мы все еще про секс говорим?
- 00:01:12,690 --> 00:01:18,030 1-й сезон, 2-я серия: "Поход на УЗИ"
- 00:02:02,030 --> 00:02:03,860 "Музей доисторической истории"
- 00:02:05,330 --> 00:02:07,250 Нет, нет, все хорошо. Отлично
- 00:02:07,500 --> 00:02:11,090 Но по-моему, она немного сердится?
- 00:02:11,340 --> 00:02:14,550 Ну, у нее есть на что
- 00:02:14,760 --> 00:02:16,260 Правда?
- 00:02:16,510 --> 00:02:18,800 Пока он где-то лупит других баб дубиной...
- 00:02:19,050 --> 00:02:22,680 ...она пытается вывести из ковра запах мастодонта
- 00:02:22,930 --> 00:02:26,770 Марша, понимаешь, это пещерные люди
- 00:02:27,020 --> 00:02:29,440 А проблемы у них примерно такие:
- 00:02:29,690 --> 00:02:33,190 "Ой-вэй, ледник приближается!" Поняла?
- 00:02:33,440 --> 00:02:36,780 - Кстати о проблемах - твоя бывшая? - Нет, не она.
- 00:02:37,030 --> 00:02:38,610 Она, она. Привет, Кэрол!
- 00:02:38,860 --> 00:02:40,530 Действительно, она
- 00:02:40,780 --> 00:02:44,620 Иди, встретимся в ледниковом периоде
- 00:02:57,970 --> 00:03:01,010 Привет
- 00:03:06,980 --> 00:03:09,310 Ну вот...
- 00:03:09,390 --> 00:03:11,730 Ты здорово выглядишь
- 00:03:11,980 --> 00:03:13,820 Меня это добивает
- 00:03:14,070 --> 00:03:14,980 Ну извини
- 00:03:15,230 --> 00:03:17,400 Спасибо. Ты тоже неплохо смотришься
- 00:03:17,650 --> 00:03:21,660 Ну, в этом-то окружении любой...
- 00:03:22,070 --> 00:03:24,870 ...прямоходящий...
- 00:03:26,740 --> 00:03:28,160 Что новенького? Все еще...
- 00:03:28,410 --> 00:03:31,120 Лесбиянка? Да
- 00:03:31,500 --> 00:03:33,000 Ну, мало ли что бывает
- 00:03:33,250 --> 00:03:35,500 Как семья?
- 00:03:35,750 --> 00:03:38,510 У Марти все еще паранойя
- 00:03:38,760 --> 00:03:42,090 Кстати, Кэрол, зачем ты пришла?
- 00:03:42,510 --> 00:03:43,510 Я беременна
- 00:03:43,760 --> 00:03:46,260 Беременна!
- 00:03:53,770 --> 00:03:56,360 Похоже, не так уж она торопилась
- 00:03:56,610 --> 00:04:02,740 Тупая блондинка, шутки про секс. Новаторский сюжет.
- 00:04:04,120 --> 00:04:07,740 Я уже видела. Убийца - таксист.
- 00:04:08,120 --> 00:04:09,790 Ты закончил?
- 00:04:10,040 --> 00:04:13,880 Извини, если глотать - получается медленнее
- 00:04:14,130 --> 00:04:15,960 Чья это смятая бумажка?
- 00:04:16,210 --> 00:04:19,880 Моя. Я написал себе записку, потом решил, что она не нужна
- 00:04:20,130 --> 00:04:23,800 И смял ее, а теперь думаю - да, я недостоин жить
- 00:04:24,890 --> 00:04:30,140 Она ее уже взбивала. Моника, ты уже... Ну ладно
- 00:04:30,390 --> 00:04:33,810 Понимаете, ребята, я не хочу давать им в руки оружие
- 00:04:34,060 --> 00:04:36,150 Ой, родители бывают так жестоки...
- 00:04:36,400 --> 00:04:39,230 ...к невзбитым подушкам детей
- 00:04:39,480 --> 00:04:42,650 Моника? Приветик!
- 00:04:42,900 --> 00:04:46,450 Моника, ты меня пугаешь
- 00:04:46,700 --> 00:04:50,250 Ты просто ураган какой-то
- 00:04:50,500 --> 00:04:53,160 И не в хорошем смысле
- 00:04:53,540 --> 00:04:54,620 Да, успокойся
- 00:04:54,870 --> 00:04:59,340 Вот Росс не делает... ураган из каждого их прихода
- 00:04:59,590 --> 00:05:03,340 Потому что для моих родителей Росс - идеал
- 00:05:03,590 --> 00:05:05,510 Понимаете, он у них - принц
- 00:05:05,760 --> 00:05:10,720 А меня, наверное, даже на его коронацию не пропустили бы
- 00:05:12,850 --> 00:05:16,940 - Что? - Гадкий Голый Дядька качает ляжки.
- 00:05:20,530 --> 00:05:24,820 - Видели мое обручальное кольцо? - Да, такое красивое!
- 00:05:28,870 --> 00:05:31,910 Боже мой! Боже мой!
- 00:05:32,120 --> 00:05:35,540 Нет, не трогай!
- 00:05:36,460 --> 00:05:40,710 Мало мне того, как я вчера боялась идти возвращать кольцо
- 00:05:40,960 --> 00:05:42,960 "Барри, помнишь меня? Я - та девушка...
- 00:05:43,210 --> 00:05:46,130 ...которая растоптала твои чувства перед всей твоей семьей"
- 00:05:46,380 --> 00:05:49,470 А теперь нужно возвращать кольцо, что без кольца...
- 00:05:49,720 --> 00:05:53,390 ...становится намного труднее
- 00:05:53,640 --> 00:05:56,390 Спокойно, мы его найдем. Ведь правда?
- 00:05:56,640 --> 00:05:59,020 Так, разберемся
- 00:06:00,150 --> 00:06:01,650 Когда оно было на тебе?
- 00:06:01,900 --> 00:06:05,740 Как бы перед тем, как потерялось
- 00:06:06,570 --> 00:06:10,780 Ты забыла добавить "на самом деле"
- 00:06:10,910 --> 00:06:13,580 Я помню, что надела его утром
- 00:06:13,830 --> 00:06:16,830 И оно было на мне в кухне, где я...
- 00:06:17,080 --> 00:06:19,960 Готовила мужу завтрак?
- 00:06:21,340 --> 00:06:24,260 Ой, не сердись
- 00:06:24,510 --> 00:06:26,760 - Только не это! - Ну извини.
- 00:06:27,010 --> 00:06:30,350 Я дала тебе ровно одно поручение!
- 00:06:30,600 --> 00:06:34,270 Зато посмотри, какие ровные макароны!
- 00:06:34,520 --> 00:06:40,190 Знаешь, Моника, а ведь кольцо в лазанье ищут совсем не так
- 00:06:41,020 --> 00:06:43,610 Я просто не могу
- 00:06:43,860 --> 00:06:45,780 Ребята!
- 00:06:46,030 --> 00:06:48,950 Мы заходим!
- 00:06:56,040 --> 00:06:58,410 Привет
- 00:06:58,790 --> 00:07:00,540 У-у, это не привет счастливого человека
- 00:07:00,790 --> 00:07:02,210 Кэрол беременна
- 00:07:02,460 --> 00:07:05,420 Ой, я его нашла!
- 00:07:09,720 --> 00:07:11,800 Вот-вот
- 00:07:12,050 --> 00:07:13,640 Делай так еще два часа...
- 00:07:13,890 --> 00:07:17,390 ...и будешь в том состоянии, в каком сейчас я
- 00:07:17,640 --> 00:07:22,360 Теперь проблема с подушками приобретает особое значение
- 00:07:23,150 --> 00:07:25,650 А какое место отводится тебе?
- 00:07:25,900 --> 00:07:28,490 Карол и Сьюзан хотят, чтобы я участвовал
- 00:07:28,740 --> 00:07:33,320 Но если мне это неприятно, то я не обязан
- 00:07:33,580 --> 00:07:35,490 В общем, на мой выбор
- 00:07:35,740 --> 00:07:39,460 Она классная. Я по ней скучаю
- 00:07:43,170 --> 00:07:44,590 Так что означает "участвовать"?
- 00:07:44,840 --> 00:07:48,880 Мне кажется, основную работу ты уже проделал
- 00:07:49,590 --> 00:07:52,180 Ну, они хотят пойти со мной...
- 00:07:52,430 --> 00:07:54,850 ...завтра на УЗИ или как там его
- 00:07:55,100 --> 00:07:56,100 Что будешь делать?
- 00:07:56,350 --> 00:07:58,350 Не представляю
- 00:07:58,600 --> 00:08:03,810 Во всяком случае, я не откажусь от отцовства
- 00:08:12,280 --> 00:08:15,450 Она все равно испорчена, правда?
- 00:08:20,460 --> 00:08:25,290 О, дочка Марты Лагвин хочет тебе позвонить
- 00:08:26,540 --> 00:08:28,630 М-м, от чего этот привкус карри?
- 00:08:28,880 --> 00:08:31,550 От карри
- 00:08:34,470 --> 00:08:37,560 Очень вкусно! Правда-правда
- 00:08:37,810 --> 00:08:40,810 Помнишь Лагвинов? Их старшая по тебе вздыхала
- 00:08:41,060 --> 00:08:43,390 Они все по нем вздыхали!
- 00:08:43,650 --> 00:08:44,650 Ну мама!
- 00:08:44,900 --> 00:08:47,070 Прости, а зачем ей звонить мне?
- 00:08:47,320 --> 00:08:51,740 Она закончила школу, хочет иметь отношение к кулинарии
- 00:08:51,990 --> 00:08:53,150 Что-то в этом роде
- 00:08:53,400 --> 00:08:55,070 Я сказала ей, что у тебя ресторан
- 00:08:55,320 --> 00:08:58,580 Нет, мама, у меня нет ресторана. Я работаю в ресторане
- 00:08:58,830 --> 00:09:02,120 Это им знать не обязательно
- 00:09:04,670 --> 00:09:08,170 Росс, помоги мне со спагетти, будь любезен
- 00:09:08,420 --> 00:09:10,510 О, у нас будут спагетти. Это так...
- 00:09:10,760 --> 00:09:13,680 ...просто
- 00:09:14,300 --> 00:09:17,350 Я знаю, с моей стороны это страшный эгоизм...
- 00:09:17,600 --> 00:09:20,680 ...но ты собираешься поднимать детско-лесбийскую тему?
- 00:09:20,930 --> 00:09:24,270 Это ослабило бы давление на меня
- 00:09:26,860 --> 00:09:30,690 Боже, что натворила Рэйчел! Мы встретили ее родителей в клубе
- 00:09:30,940 --> 00:09:32,860 Играли они посредственно
- 00:09:33,110 --> 00:09:35,280 Не скажу, сколько они угрохали на свадьбу...
- 00:09:35,530 --> 00:09:39,580 ...но 40 000 долларов - это большие деньги
- 00:09:41,040 --> 00:09:46,210 Но у нее хотя бы было кого бросать у алтаря
- 00:09:47,830 --> 00:09:49,040 Как это понимать?
- 00:09:49,290 --> 00:09:50,800 Никак
- 00:09:51,050 --> 00:09:54,130 - Это поговорка. - Ничего подобного.
- 00:09:54,380 --> 00:09:57,720 Не слушай ее! Ты всегда была независимая
- 00:09:57,970 --> 00:10:00,310 Даже толстым неуклюжим ребенком,
- 00:10:00,560 --> 00:10:04,890 совсем не имея друзей, ты держалась здорово
- 00:10:05,140 --> 00:10:09,810 Ты читала в своей комнате, складывала головоломки...
- 00:10:11,820 --> 00:10:15,740 Есть люди типа Росса, которые хотят звезд с неба
- 00:10:15,990 --> 00:10:18,820 У него этот музей, и печатные работы выходят
- 00:10:19,070 --> 00:10:21,160 А другие довольствуются малым
- 00:10:21,410 --> 00:10:26,660 И скажу тебе, именно у них никогда не бывает рака
- 00:10:28,080 --> 00:10:32,250 Бывают женщины с такими амбициями, но слава богу...
- 00:10:32,500 --> 00:10:36,970 ...у нашей маленькой Гармоники нет ничего подобного
- 00:10:38,180 --> 00:10:41,680 Ну, Росс, а как дела у тебя?
- 00:10:41,930 --> 00:10:48,230 Есть что рассказать? Поделись новостями, байками из жизни
- 00:10:50,100 --> 00:10:53,570 Насколько я понимаю, вам интересно...
- 00:10:53,820 --> 00:10:56,860 ...что же произошло между мной и Кэрол
- 00:10:57,110 --> 00:11:00,320 Вот как все получилось
- 00:11:01,950 --> 00:11:04,910 Кэрол - лесбиянка
- 00:11:05,620 --> 00:11:09,460 Она живет с женщиной по имени Сьюзан
- 00:11:09,870 --> 00:11:13,210 Она беременна моим ребенком
- 00:11:13,460 --> 00:11:18,010 И они со Сьюзан собираются его растить
- 00:11:20,720 --> 00:11:23,720 Ты знала, а нам не сказала?!
- 00:11:36,900 --> 00:11:39,570 Так ваши родители - и правда такие сволочи?
- 00:11:39,820 --> 00:11:43,860 Знаете, они просто профессионалы
- 00:11:44,660 --> 00:11:47,160 Они знают, что они делают
- 00:11:47,410 --> 00:11:51,620 Они точно рассчитывают время и бьют без промаха!
- 00:11:51,830 --> 00:11:55,080 Конечно, говорят, что родителей не выбирают
- 00:11:55,330 --> 00:11:59,880 Но я бы охотно выбрала твоих
- 00:12:00,340 --> 00:12:02,670 Надо пописать!
- 00:12:03,010 --> 00:12:04,760 Еще хуже, когда вы близнецы
- 00:12:05,010 --> 00:12:07,100 - Ты близнец? - Да. Мы не разговариваем.
- 00:12:07,350 --> 00:12:10,270 Она властная и амбициозная карьеристка
- 00:12:10,520 --> 00:12:13,850 - Кем она работает? - Официанткой.
- 00:12:14,600 --> 00:12:17,520 Все, ребята, мне пора убирать
- 00:12:17,770 --> 00:12:20,690 Чендлер, ты единственный ребенок. У тебя этого нет
- 00:12:20,940 --> 00:12:24,280 Нет, хотя у меня был воображаемый друг
- 00:12:24,530 --> 00:12:27,780 И родители больше любили его
- 00:12:28,530 --> 00:12:32,200 Свет, пожалуйста
- 00:12:37,540 --> 00:12:40,460 Сколько же я там был?
- 00:12:40,710 --> 00:12:42,380 Просто уже пора убирать
- 00:12:42,630 --> 00:12:46,800 Так что... помощь нужна?
- 00:12:46,970 --> 00:12:49,890 Конечно, спасибо
- 00:12:54,230 --> 00:12:56,140 Так о чем это я...
- 00:12:56,390 --> 00:12:59,820 Ты нервничаешь насчет завтра и Барри?
- 00:13:00,070 --> 00:13:02,980 Слегка
- 00:13:03,320 --> 00:13:05,650 Очень
- 00:13:05,900 --> 00:13:08,410 Посоветуешь что-нибудь?
- 00:13:08,660 --> 00:13:12,740 Как мужчина, которого недавно бортанули
- 00:13:12,990 --> 00:13:17,670 Посоветую избегать слова "бортанули"
- 00:13:17,920 --> 00:13:22,090 Он может чувствовать себя опустошенным. Знаешь что?
- 00:13:22,340 --> 00:13:27,880 Не будь слишком красивой. Это убивает
- 00:13:29,850 --> 00:13:34,180 Или я могу пойти к Барри и отдать ему кольцо
- 00:13:34,430 --> 00:13:40,610 А ты пойди с Кэрол и Сьюзан - будет чисто женская консультация
- 00:13:41,020 --> 00:13:44,110 А, у тебя же завтра Кэрол!
- 00:13:44,360 --> 00:13:46,280 Почему все так сложно?
- 00:13:46,530 --> 00:13:48,450 И я о том же
- 00:13:48,700 --> 00:13:51,200 Помнишь, как мы вместе учились в школе?
- 00:13:51,450 --> 00:13:53,870 Разве ты не мечтал встретить кого-то...
- 00:13:54,120 --> 00:13:58,080 ...влюбиться, и чтобы насовсем?
- 00:14:06,550 --> 00:14:10,390 Никогда бы не подумала, что так получится
- 00:14:16,730 --> 00:14:19,440 Я тоже
- 00:14:35,660 --> 00:14:37,750 Извини, задержался на работе
- 00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:42,330 Там такой динозаврище, короче...
- 00:14:42,580 --> 00:14:44,500 Привет
- 00:14:44,750 --> 00:14:49,090 - Росс, помнишь Сьюзан? - Как можно забыть?
- 00:14:49,340 --> 00:14:53,430 Привет, Сьюзан. Крепкая рука, крепкая
- 00:14:54,010 --> 00:14:56,680 А кто еще должен быть?
- 00:14:56,930 --> 00:14:59,270 - Доктор Оберман. - Так он...?
- 00:14:59,520 --> 00:15:02,980 - Она. - Конечно, как же иначе.
- 00:15:03,190 --> 00:15:07,190 Она знает о нашей специфике?
- 00:15:07,440 --> 00:15:09,280 Да, и поддерживает нас
- 00:15:09,530 --> 00:15:13,070 Отлично! Правда, отлично!
- 00:15:13,200 --> 00:15:15,450 Нет, спасибо. А!..
- 00:15:15,700 --> 00:15:18,200 Спасибо
- 00:15:37,310 --> 00:15:40,480 Это для открытия шейки матки
- 00:15:45,400 --> 00:15:46,230 Барри?
- 00:15:46,480 --> 00:15:48,400 Заходи
- 00:15:48,650 --> 00:15:49,900 Правда, можно?
- 00:15:50,150 --> 00:15:54,450 Все нормально. Робби здесь на много часов
- 00:15:56,740 --> 00:15:59,330 Как твои дела?
- 00:15:59,580 --> 00:16:01,660 Я...
- 00:16:01,910 --> 00:16:04,420 Я в порядке
- 00:16:04,670 --> 00:16:07,340 Здорово выглядишь
- 00:16:08,000 --> 00:16:10,510 "Доктор Фарбер, Джейсон подавился"
- 00:16:10,760 --> 00:16:15,140 Я сейчас. Я отойду на минутку
- 00:16:18,680 --> 00:16:21,060 Я его бортанула
- 00:16:38,950 --> 00:16:42,200 Так как мы теперь будем...
- 00:16:42,450 --> 00:16:43,870 ...ну, со всем этим?
- 00:16:44,120 --> 00:16:47,210 Как будем принимать важные решения?
- 00:16:47,460 --> 00:16:48,710 Какие, например?
- 00:16:48,960 --> 00:16:50,710 Ну, я не знаю
- 00:16:50,960 --> 00:16:54,380 Например, имя ребенка?
- 00:16:54,630 --> 00:16:58,720 Марлон, если мальчик. Минни, если девочка
- 00:16:59,300 --> 00:17:02,270 Как Минни-Маус?
- 00:17:02,470 --> 00:17:04,480 Как моя бабушка
- 00:17:04,730 --> 00:17:09,270 Все равно, после "Минни" просится "Маус"
- 00:17:09,820 --> 00:17:11,820 А как насчет...
- 00:17:12,070 --> 00:17:14,150 К примеру, "Джулия"?
- 00:17:14,400 --> 00:17:15,400 Джулия
- 00:17:15,650 --> 00:17:16,820 Мы решили - Минни
- 00:17:17,070 --> 00:17:19,740 А мы решили прожить вместе жизнь
- 00:17:19,990 --> 00:17:23,080 Все меняется. Мало ли что бывает
- 00:17:23,330 --> 00:17:26,790 Не будем исключать и Джулию?
- 00:17:28,330 --> 00:17:31,250 Извини, задержался
- 00:17:32,920 --> 00:17:36,590 Ну, что у тебя новенького?
- 00:17:36,840 --> 00:17:38,510 Ничего особенного
- 00:17:38,590 --> 00:17:39,590 Нашла работу
- 00:17:39,840 --> 00:17:42,090 Отлично!
- 00:17:42,340 --> 00:17:45,310 Откуда такой загар?
- 00:17:46,560 --> 00:17:48,600 Я был на Арубе
- 00:17:48,850 --> 00:17:51,690 Как? Ты поехал на медовый месяц один?
- 00:17:51,940 --> 00:17:54,650 Нет
- 00:17:56,610 --> 00:17:59,530 Видишь ли...
- 00:17:59,780 --> 00:18:03,030 - Тебе может быть больно. - Мне?
- 00:18:05,700 --> 00:18:07,450 Я поехал с Минди
- 00:18:07,700 --> 00:18:09,620 Минди?
- 00:18:09,870 --> 00:18:12,710 Моей свидетельницей Минди?
- 00:18:13,380 --> 00:18:16,750 Мы сейчас встречаемся
- 00:18:19,010 --> 00:18:20,800 Пересадка волос!
- 00:18:21,050 --> 00:18:24,220 Осторожно. Они еще не прижились
- 00:18:24,470 --> 00:18:26,850 И контактные линзы
- 00:18:27,100 --> 00:18:29,810 Ты же не любишь лазить пальцем в глаз
- 00:18:30,060 --> 00:18:33,020 Ради нее я готов
- 00:18:35,560 --> 00:18:39,400 Слушай, я хочу тебя поблагодарить
- 00:18:40,900 --> 00:18:42,990 Месяц назад я хотел сделать тебе больно
- 00:18:43,240 --> 00:18:45,660 Больше, чем кому-либо в жизни
- 00:18:45,910 --> 00:18:48,790 А я ведь стоматолог
- 00:18:49,830 --> 00:18:51,250 Знаешь, ты была права
- 00:18:51,500 --> 00:18:53,330 Я думал, мы были счастливы
- 00:18:53,580 --> 00:18:56,130 А на самом деле нет
- 00:18:56,290 --> 00:18:58,750 Но с Минди...
- 00:18:59,000 --> 00:19:01,760 ...теперь я счастлив
- 00:19:02,010 --> 00:19:03,180 - Сплюнь. - Что?
- 00:19:03,430 --> 00:19:05,890 Это мне
- 00:19:06,970 --> 00:19:09,930 Ну ладно...
- 00:19:10,350 --> 00:19:14,600 Я думаю, это принадлежит тебе
- 00:19:14,850 --> 00:19:17,690 Спасибо, что предложил его мне
- 00:19:17,940 --> 00:19:21,860 Спасибо, что вернула его
- 00:19:23,860 --> 00:19:26,820 Аллё!
- 00:19:28,870 --> 00:19:30,950 Да ну! Чем плохо "Хелен"?
- 00:19:31,200 --> 00:19:33,370 Хелен Геллер?
- 00:19:33,620 --> 00:19:34,790 Нет уж, спасибо!
- 00:19:35,040 --> 00:19:37,080 Не будет никакой Хелен Геллер
- 00:19:37,420 --> 00:19:38,550 Спасибо
- 00:19:38,800 --> 00:19:41,300 В смысле, не Геллер
- 00:19:41,550 --> 00:19:43,890 Она будет Хелен Виллик?
- 00:19:44,140 --> 00:19:49,900 Вообще-то мы думали насчет Хелен Виллик-Банч
- 00:19:50,060 --> 00:19:52,730 Подождите. Причем тут она?
- 00:19:52,980 --> 00:19:54,820 Это и мой ребенок
- 00:19:55,070 --> 00:19:59,320 Да? И много ты спермы дала?
- 00:20:00,490 --> 00:20:03,660 Ой, как страшно ты перетрудился!
- 00:20:03,910 --> 00:20:05,330 Эй вы, прекратите!
- 00:20:05,580 --> 00:20:08,500 Если даже она участвует, то и я там тоже не лишний!
- 00:20:08,750 --> 00:20:13,670 Что? Хелен Виллик-Банч-Геллер? Это на грани насилия над детьми!
- 00:20:13,920 --> 00:20:17,710 Нет, конечно! Я предлагаю Геллер-Виллик-Банч
- 00:20:17,960 --> 00:20:20,930 Нет-нет! Он знает, что столько фамилий не помнят
- 00:20:21,180 --> 00:20:25,100 Ее станут называть "Геллер", и все выйдет, как он хочет
- 00:20:25,350 --> 00:20:27,350 Как я хочу? Вот это - как я хочу?
- 00:20:27,600 --> 00:20:31,190 Знаете, вот это меньше всего похоже на то, как я этого хотел.
- 00:20:31,440 --> 00:20:35,110 Как угодно, только не так. Какой-то бред получается
- 00:20:35,360 --> 00:20:37,940 Тук-тук! Как у нас дела? Тошнит?
- 00:20:38,190 --> 00:20:41,660 - Немного. - Есть такое дело.
- 00:20:41,860 --> 00:20:46,700 Я спрашивала будущую маму, но спасибо за откровенность
- 00:20:46,950 --> 00:20:48,330 Откиньтесь
- 00:20:48,580 --> 00:20:50,370 Знаете что, я пойду
- 00:20:50,620 --> 00:20:56,170 Не хочу я "участвовать" в этих вот семейных делах
- 00:21:05,890 --> 00:21:07,060 Боже мой!
- 00:21:07,310 --> 00:21:08,560 Посмотрите!
- 00:21:08,810 --> 00:21:11,770 Вот это да!
- 00:21:20,990 --> 00:21:24,530 Разве это не чудо?
- 00:21:26,740 --> 00:21:29,950 А что мы должны там увидеть?
- 00:21:30,250 --> 00:21:35,580 Не знаю точно, но по-моему оно готовится напасть на звездолет
- 00:21:38,170 --> 00:21:41,130 Если наклонить голову и расфокусировать зрение...
- 00:21:41,380 --> 00:21:44,630 ...то будет похоже на старую картофелину
- 00:21:44,890 --> 00:21:48,100 - Тогда не делай так, ладно? - Хорошо.
- 00:21:50,850 --> 00:21:53,770 Моника, что скажешь ты?
- 00:21:55,020 --> 00:21:57,020 - Комок в горле? - Нет.
- 00:21:57,270 --> 00:21:58,110 Да, точно
- 00:21:58,360 --> 00:22:00,530 - У тебя комок в горле. - Нет.
- 00:22:00,780 --> 00:22:04,700 - Ты будешь теткой. - Да иди ты!
- 00:22:04,950 --> 00:22:06,530 Привет, Минди!
- 00:22:06,780 --> 00:22:08,700 Это Рэйчел
- 00:22:08,950 --> 00:22:13,540 Да, нормально. Я сегодня была у Барри
- 00:22:13,790 --> 00:22:17,790 Он мне сказал. Нет, все в порядке. Правда-правда
- 00:22:18,040 --> 00:22:21,550 Желаю вам счастья. Честно
- 00:22:21,800 --> 00:22:25,380 И знаешь, Минди, если у вас все получится...
- 00:22:25,630 --> 00:22:29,300 ...если вы поженитесь и нарожаете детей...
- 00:22:29,550 --> 00:22:34,140 ...хоть бы у них были его волосы и твой старый нос!
- 00:22:37,690 --> 00:22:43,030 Знаю-знаю, это дешевка, но мне так полегчало!
- 00:22:44,280 --> 00:22:46,570 Перевод В.Бродового
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